Comments on: News Flash: Floyd Landis to Face “Attractive Nuisance” Class Action Lawsuit

By: Unknown

Unknown — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 15:38:19 +0000

I read this about 30 seconds after reading the Floyd may have tested positive for drugs during that stage. Kind of lost the funny after that.

By: barry1021

barry1021 — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 12:56:06 +0000

Uh-oh to the 100th power on potential bad doping news…..

B21

By: Tom Stormcrowe

Tom Stormcrowe — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 11:57:17 +0000

Fatty this has to be the best "Fake News" post you’ve ever done! That’s a;; I can say!

By: BIg Mike In Oz

BIg Mike In Oz — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 11:47:46 +0000

The Phonak legal team have been awaiting this day for years. The chance to finally reveal the true origins of their naming entity.

Mr Maviva would be well warned to carefully research all aspects of this case before proceeding. There are dark and powerful forces at work here that he is not in a position to fully comprehend. And he is also not in a position to sell his soul for a favourable verdict. Lawyer… soul… you work it out.

It is important at this juncture to remember that almost every word, in every modern language, is derived from a similar sounding word in a different more ancient group of languages. Such is the case with Phonak.

I call your attention to the ancient greek phrase – fhun knackerd. The word phonak was derived from a contraction of that phrase. To better understand the ancient phrase it is necessary to look at 2 other modern words derived from the ancient – phun… fun, knackerd… knackered. Fun needs no explanation. Knackered is more of an English word than American and means tired, stuffed, exhausted. It is a mild interpretation of a much harsher word. In ancient manuscripts it translates as dead or killed.

Thus it is shown that the warning that Mr Maviva contends is missing, is in fact right in front of our faces. Phonak literally translates to FUN CAN KILL. Floyd was wearing the warning on his jersey every turn of the pedals. If the viewing public was too ignorant to investigate the source of such an unusual word, the team can not be held responsible.

You can only put so many labels on a bottle of arsenic, it’s up the individual whether they believe or ignore the warnings.

Floyd trained for years to build up his tolerance to the deadliness of a seemingly enjoyable pass-time. But without that conditioning he would be just as susceptible as the next man. The nausea mere mortals feel climbing a long steep road is a warning and if individuals try to emulate Floyd and go twice as fast the nausea turns into any number of far worse symptoms, including drowning on dry land.

Surely (or surly, or both) Mr Maviva realises the futility of commencing an action against such a solid defence. But if he chooses to proceed I say bring it on, I’ve been banging my head against a brick wall as training for just this moment.

yours sincerelyMr Sven Ghali Esq.Phonak Senior Legal Counsel

By: Jane

Jane — Thu, 27 Jul 2006 04:38:43 +0000

So, how DOES one become a MSN Best Of darling? Just curious – Jane

By: Tammy

Tammy — Wed, 26 Jul 2006 21:48:02 +0000

I’d vote for you, but I lost to a cyclist about a month ago. Sorry.
-From Utah

By: barry1021

barry1021 — Wed, 26 Jul 2006 19:18:32 +0000

AshbyGirls

Hmmm, you sure don’t want to break your promise to the TDF Gods, they are very powerful (Al. M is on their Board of Directors). Several possibilities here.

1. Refrain from the Wild Thing until August 1.
2. Did you promise them it would be the First name?
3. Dilute it. Call him Elden-Floyd or FattyCyclist-Floyd. No one will even notice the Floyd part.
4. Foreign-ize it. Jean-Floyd, or Louis-Floyd. You can pronounce it differently ("excuse me, it’s pronounced Floo-eede")
5. Explain to the Gods your promise was based on the Hebrew calendar. ("I didn’t mean July, I meant Nisan").
6. Borrow my 16 year old daughter for a week. Your desire to procreate will vanish (Zero Population Growth cover child).

Geez and what if its a girl?? Floydetta??

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By: Unknown

Unknown — Wed, 26 Jul 2006 17:06:48 +0000

Inspiring though it may have been there is little chance Mr. Landis will repeat his TdF victory in 2007. A group of investors backing the Earwax-Vegemite team has discovered a young man raised in the confines of a strict Dervish household who will have both ankles replaced during the Tour itself. His chronic shoulder bursitis will go untreated. "Everybody feels pain," he says. "For some reason my body is just able to interpret it as a really good time." A rumor that Landis will defect to the T-Mobile squad will also affect his reputation, as he’s almost certain to be ridiculed as "Pink" Floyd if he doesn’t give us a reprise of Stage 17 heroics. Sad how this stuff pans out.

By: Ashbygirls

Ashbygirls — Wed, 26 Jul 2006 16:58:21 +0000

Floyd is the man. Unfortunately I made the mistake of promising the TdF gods after stage 16 that if Floyd could come back and win the tour, and if I get pregnant this month, that I would name my child Floyd. I don’t know if the TdF gods have any special fertility powers, but let’s just say I’m a little nervous.

By: barry1021

barry1021 — Wed, 26 Jul 2006 16:26:01 +0000

Ah to the good old days, when FC was not as big a star and wasn’t getting spammed. The price for success.

I have now taken Floyd’s perfomance to a whole new level. Last night my wife came home and asked me why I had not made the salad for dinner as I was supposed to. My reply: "Sorry Honey, I just Stage Sixteened and forgot". And my six month review at work was a record for briefness-"Boss, it’s been a stage sixteen since January, I admit, but I am gonna stage seventeen from here on out". Living in Boston, I expect the Mass Transit Authority will come out with their "oops, it was our stage sixteen" to explain the collapsing roof in the Big Dig any day now.

Al–M. Kitchen Sinkewitz?? Oh man, at the very least, you owe me clean-up renumeration for peanut butter sandwich spittle in my keyboard. I really have to remember not to be eating or drinking when I read your posts.

But the best stuff cannot be made up–how cool was the picture of Floyd’s parent’s house–a big sign "To God The Glory" (obviously the "official" sign), and then a little sign stuck in the dirt "Floyd’s The Man". Very cool.

B21