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October 7, 2008

Dontrelle Willis expelled following Game 3 no-hitter
Selig: “Doping Controls Work”

Tampa Bay: Baseball suffered another brutal setback today, with the shocking report in Sports Illustrated that Dontrelle Willis tested positive for a banned substance following Game 3 of the World Series last night. The Milwaukee Brewer pitcher had just come off a no-hitter victory over the Tampa Bay Devil Rays that many pundits already referred to as one of the greatest performances in World Series history. “I can not begin to say how disappointed I am,” said Milwaukee manager Gabe Kapler. “But I can assure you this is as far as it goes.”

According to sources within Major League Baseball, Commissioner Bud Selig is planning on suspending Willis and forfeiting Milwaukee’s 1-0 victory over Tampa Bay, but the team will be allowed to continue the series. In a press conference last night, Selig appeared to agree with Kapler’s sentiments, “It is inconceivable that any player would risk doping in the current environment, but clearly we can see that our new doping controls work.” In a written statement, Milwaukee owner Mark Attanasio said, “While I am saddened by this accusation, it is important that we protect the rights of this player, and that for the good of the game, that all sides remain calm, and allow the process to follow its due course.”

The positive doping test by Willis echoes the 2007 World Series Scandal, when the sudden death of Jason Giambi led to the exposure of a massive doping network and the expulsion of dozens of marquee players and the suspension of World Series winning New York Yankees for the entire 2008 season. A FBI investigation stemming from Giambi’s collapse during a three-homerun performance against the Boston Red Sox in game one of the 2007 American League championship series led to a raid of Yankees offices and arrests of the team doctor and training staff on narcotics charges in the days following the Yankees subsequent sweep of the Cardinals in the World Series. This prompted New York Michael Bloomberg to cancel the planned parade down the city’s Avenue of Heroes. Shortly thereafter, federal indictments were issued against 17 members of the Yankees championship squad and nearly 100 other players – including members of every other playoff contender. Commissioner Bud Selig responded by unilaterally banning the Yankees from playing in the 2008 season and gut the rosters of almost every team in baseball.

The MLB Player’s Association has demanded that the league reinstate Willis. “Once again, the witch hunt has taken precedence over due process,” said spokesman Greg Bouris. “How can we trust a lab or the commissioner when test results are being leaked prior to the verification process? This is not only unfair, but a violation of the collective bargaining agreement.” Bouris stated, referring to the so-called “emergency pact” negotiated following the sit out of the 2008 All-Star game, when players took the field but refused to play during the nationally televised event.

It is not clear how fans and advertisers will react to this latest scandal. Ironically, MLB showcased Willis’ performance this season, capped by yesterday’s no-hitter, to advertisers as an example of the sport’s success in overcoming the doping scandal. After the suspension of the Yankees, baseball’s most profitable team, and the expulsion of dozens of the most popular players, advertised defected in droves. However, Dontrelle Willis, a sinewy phenom who came across as the antithesis of the muscle bound doper, posted a brilliant season and appeared in advertisements for lucrative sponsors such as Miller and Pepsi. Executives at both firms stated that they are now questioning whether to pull their ads from the remaining games, and an unnamed source within Fox Sports, the broadcaster for the World Series, said that the network does not plan to renew its contract with MLB, which expires this year.

The World Series between Tampa Bay and Milwaukee, two small market teams whose rosters were unscathed by last winters bloodletting, was the lowest rated since the 1994 strike. Similarly, regular season ratings were down twenty percent from 2007. Internet chatrooms and bars across America seem to reflect the public’s growing ambilivance towards the national pastime – and dedicated fans’ growing suspicion of the process. “It’s a set up,” said Brian Kapellusch, President of Brewerfan.com. “The lab is based in Florida. The press found out before the commissioners office, and Bud [Selig] punishes Dontrelle [Willis] before he has even seen the evidence, or tested a B sample. It’s absurd.” A patron at Kelly’s Bleachers, a bar located within site of Milwaukee’s Miller Stadium, reflected the frustration of many fans, “How do I explain this to my kid?”