Comments on: Desperate Measures

By: Nancy S

Nancy S — Tue, 20 Sep 2011 21:26:19 +0000

I’ve been troving through your old blog posts to learn more about Susan, as I am a relative newcomer to your blog. Naturally, digging through the archives, I’ve run across a lot of fun stuff along the way. But I’ve tried to focus on learning the story.

This particular post, addressing the countless well-meaning people that suggest trying something they “heard about” is absolutely outstanding. You very concisely explain what effect it has on you, at the same time being charitable about people’s motives.

We are new to the world of cancer, my husband having been diagnosed only a few months ago, but I’ve already been frustrated (and annoyed, I’m ashamed to admit) by these suggestions. Thank you for saying clearly what must be on the minds of so many fighting the battle. You truly are gifted at written expression.

Nancy in Mpls.

By: Stewart Paterson

Stewart Paterson — Thu, 22 May 2008 18:20:22 +0000

Came here via Whiskey Before Breakfast.
I’m a cyclist too. Did Paris Brest Paris in 2003, will try and do it again in 2011 before I turn 50.
I’m a little bit fat.

I don’t pray, but I do feel. It’s crap isn’t it? Whatever we say will sound trite and lightweight. Hang in there.

By: Craig, The Fanders Fat Cat

Craig, The Fanders Fat Cat — Wed, 21 May 2008 15:43:14 +0000

Fat Cyclist,
Besides riding bikes and being at a less than optimal power to weight ratio, we also have another thing in common. My wife was also diagnosed with breast cancer last year. Thankfully, all has been going well, but it is still scary stuff. Just last week she went so far as to have all the top female (and nonessential)cancer offenders prophylactically removed from her person. Still she doesn’t really feel “safe.”
Another oddity is that my wife is a neurologist and I am a chiropractor; so, we see this thing from mainstream and alternative. Let me tell you that you are right to ignore most of these folk remedies, at least with regard to breast cancer. Although the FDA and the AMA can be a little…territorial, I can tell you that if there was a definitive cure for cancer that could be sold, by God they and the drug companies would be right on it. Everybody knows about the friction between the pharmeceutical giants and the proponets of natural cures. But, when irrifutable evidence comes along, they jump in with both feet. Look at Glucosamine for joints, Medico’s prescribe it all the time now and it is on the shelves everywhere. All the big boys are selling zinc now for colds. At the risk of having my pals beat me up, rest assured that you are doing the right things. Well paid people are out in the deepest jungles taste testing grubs and distilling exotic flowers looking for the next big thing in cancer. If somebody was sitting around in good ole Mexico with it, the heavy hitters would get it and sell it.

By: Mama Nabi

Mama Nabi — Mon, 19 May 2008 18:08:49 +0000

No miracle cures here… just that I’m keeping you in my thoughts, that I hope whatever time you have together, be it short or very very long, you get to spend as much of it together, loving each other and creating fantastically beautiful memories of each other. With lots of love and hope…

By: Joanna (Ireland)

Joanna (Ireland) — Mon, 19 May 2008 13:01:17 +0000

Hi. I’ve only discovered your blog today. I feel compelled to leave a comment, I can’t just close this tab and forget that I read all this. I am a full-time cyclist and a nurse who has worked in haematology and oncology. Everyday I saw husbands/wives just like you and my heart went out to them but I never got this close to fully understanding the sheer desperation that accompanies oncology treatments. I dunno what I’m trying to say here… All I hope for you right now is that your wife feels normal again soon and that the two of you can share some encredibly special moments together, today, tomorrow and in the future. Best wishes, Jo.

By: Suzanne

Suzanne — Mon, 19 May 2008 02:16:29 +0000

Wow, you so eloquently said what I had felt and attempted to explain to my husband and others when I was going through cancer treatment. I DO NOT WANT TO F*CK AROUND WITH ANY OF THESE SNAKE OIL CURES, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I’m fighting for my life so you betcha I’m going to go with “tried and true”! There is no conspiracy by doctors, pharmaceutical companies, government agencies, etc., etc., etc., to suppress knowledge or treatment that can effectively treat or cure cancer — what is out there (treatment) and available to the general public is what is safest and most effective for most people, so do not try to sell me on “miracle cures”! Most people in the medical profession DO genuinely care about helping people to get better! (I like to think positive and find that I usually get what I expect!) I think most people who are going through cancer treatment also do not want to f*ck around when it comes to getting cured! For those of you who have never had cancer, the reason that such strong methods are needed to kill cancer cells is basically because cancer cells are “evil” and immortal, so you have to attack with extreme prejudice in order to obliterate them. Which is why cancer treatment can be so hard on people, you have to kill some good cells in order to kill the bad ones. Another thing–don’t encourage people to disregard their doctor’s advice by taking supplements or things alleged to help with treatment, etc., as some of those things can actually interfere with treatment and/or cause other problems! So my advice? Offer up prayers and positive thoughts, support, and encouragement and trust that (in most cases) the doctors really do know best. (off my soapbox now, and the best to you and Susan!!!!)

By: Someone in the Wasatch Front

Someone in the Wasatch Front — Sun, 18 May 2008 15:06:45 +0000

My son died of a brain tumor and we went through EXACTLY what you are talking about. The most painful part of the whole experience was not what most people might think. We knew how to live life–the kindness of others meant everything to us, our faith got us through. His death was heartbreaking and beautiful. Truly the most horrible part was the pain and humiliation I felt as, at the end of his life, I fell for one of the hoax miracle cures. Facing the shoebox of “miracle medicine” after his funeral was so awful–I felt so used and gullible and embarrassed that even though I had been warned by my son’s doctors that people would come out of the woodwork with miracle cures that I should pay them no heed, I still fell for it. Seriously, that WAS the worst part of his death. Please stick to what you know now–and to what real doctors tell you. Don’t let the hucksters and liars add humiliation and regret to all of the other emotions you will be experiencing. God bless your family in this sanctifying time.

By: A.P.

A.P. — Sat, 17 May 2008 20:21:17 +0000

Came over from bsnyc. I was out on a ride today, took a fall and suffered a mild concussion, felt pretty sorry for myself because I had to go to the doctor, then home, surf the net with a headache and a dent in my pride instead of continuing on with the rest of the group.

Well, your post puts things in perspective, and I’m grateful for reading this today. As a final year medical student, it was also professionally interesting to get an insight into the onslaught of people with good intentions that face families with cancer. From my experiences with cancer patients, you’re doing the right thing. All the best for you from Finland.

By: Erica

Erica — Sat, 17 May 2008 07:18:52 +0000

Less than 6 degrees of separation between us–just a couple, as I’m drlogan’s mom, and his blog led me to yours. I’m praying for your family, and encouraging you all in my heart. When my dad was diagnosed with a brain tumor, well-meaning relatives suggested some of the cures you’ve mentioned. It was tough to read those emails. Tough, too, to see my dad’s frustration over losing various abilities at different times, but so good to see his strong spirit and his satisfaction with the life with which he’d been blessed.

Your taping idea is beautiful. What a treasure those recordings will be.

By: Leslie

Leslie — Fri, 16 May 2008 15:14:42 +0000

My husband’s the biker, so I usually read your posts but don’t necessarily comment. Today, as the cancer survivor myself, I have to take a minute to thank you for your post. You are kind to see people as well-meaning, but when you’re on the receiving end of endless “ideas” or “advice,” it is EXHAUSTING. Thank you for writing this, and for sharing so much of your experience. I think of you, Susan, and your family daily.