On April 15, 2008 I was diagnosed with squamous cell carcinoma of the left base of the tongue. I had two chemo and 42 radiation treatments.

I’ll never be able to eat real food again. Thank God for Ensure.

But I’m alive and strong and, in many ways, a better person.

Cancer is unthinking and uncaring. I wouldn’t say anything to it.

What I would say is to those who love me most: I never knew the depth of your love before this challenge and I never knew the pain of causing you grief before. It was almost worse than the cancer.

I never want to bring this on you again.

I hate you. I hate what you made my child go through. I hate how you affected our whole family.

You suck oh, and you LOST!

I still have my beautiful daughter, though the cost was high.

Then in 1999, thirty years after getting rid of you, a young man with a bike and yellow jersy made me relize I was wrong to forget you, to deny you. I was not doing anything to fight you, to bring about your defeat. Now I want to force myself on you, dominate you, just as you did to me and are still doing to so many others. I started giving and participaing where I could to bring about you demise.

I finally discovered a very corageous group of people who have been fighting one of your tougher brothers. He goes by the name Multiple Myeloma and he is an especially tough competitor, he keeps winning, he never loses. These Multiple Myeloma patients are fighters, they are tough, and so are their families and their doctors and their nurses. Together they formerd a group called Miles for Myeloma to raise much needed money to fight you. I have joined their planning committee; this is where I want to fight you, this is where I want to make difference. After four years we have raised one million dollars to battle you. Every day now the paitients are staying in the fight longer.

Oh yes, two years ago you tried to make yourself my partner again, but you were quickly found out and with three more surgeries you have been beaten back once more. You and I have been going through this now for over fifty years. I no longer fear you as I did in the beginning; I know you can be defeated.

I’m going to keep helping my friends to fight your tougher brother, Multiple Myeloma. I really want to see them defeat you once and for all.

I grieve for the possibilities that will never be with people who are no more. I didn’t need to be aquainted with your friends Hate and Anger. How about I become the unpopular uncool person again, and you 3 go play with yourselves?