This incredibly skewed result is, I should point out, thanks to a very major donation. That said, even without that major donation, the results would still be strongly favoring me being The Hammer’s domestique this year. The contest is still young, however, and this vote could still be overturned with either a major donation or many small donations.

I think it’s amazing that not a single person has voted that I should race singlespeed, for myself.

Regardless, I will abide by the result of this vote, and plan to bring both my geared and singlespeed hardtails to Leadville. And unless things change drastically, it looks like I need to choose a 34×20 gearing for my singlespeed, with an eye toward pulling The Hammer.

The Hammer Vs. Monster question is much closer:

Based on how readers are voting with their dollars, people believe that this mother-daughter battle is going to be close.

I’ll update again tomorrow…when I post a new episode of the Rockwell Relay Race Report. Because, yes, we’ve crossed the $2500 story-hostage threshold. Thank you!

A Note from Fatty About the Rockwell Relay Story: The Rockwell Relay Story is being held hostage. It will be released as soon as I have raised the $2500 I have promised to NICA. Read on to find out how you can help read part 13 soon. 

A Note From Fatty: I’m planning to do three fundraisers this year. Right now begins the first — for The National Interscholastic Cycling Association (NICA). I’m really excited about this one because I love what NICA stands for, and because of the very cool prizes I will be offering, and because I’ll be doing some very fun and weird things for this contest.

These fun and weird things are:

1. I will give you the opportunity to win something based on a future event.
2. I will give you the opportunity to make the two most critical decisions regarding how I approach the Leadville 100 for me, and I will abide by those decisions whether I want to or not.
3. I want this fundraiser to succeed, but The Monster needs it to succeed. She’s racing the Leadville 100 in a few weeks in a charity slot for NICA. So when you donate, you’re making me happy, you’re NICA very happy, and you’re making The Monster extra double-happy.

All or Nothing
by Melisa “The Monster” Rollins 

I am—and have always been—an “all or nothing” kind of girl. If you have been following my past year of riding and racing, you wouldn’t find this too hard to believe.

To fill those of you in who haven’t been following, I didn’t particularly start off my endurance biking career easily. In March of this year, I finished my first-ever mountain bike race, the True Grit Epic: fifty brutal miles of the most technical trails in Southern Utah.

A little later, I raced the Six Hours of Frog Hollow. Then, just over a week ago I finished my third monstrous mountain bike race, the Crusher in the Tushar [Story on that coming soonish. - FC], and am looking forward to next month where I’ll be racing the Leadville 100.

OK. I lied.

True Grit Epic was actually my second ever mountain bike race. My first was just under three years ago, when I decided to try joining and racing with my high school’s NICA mountain biking team.

The NICA race happened to be held just a few miles away from my house, and because I can’t even count on two hands the number of bikes in my garage, I figured I might be able to wrangle up a bike for an hour or so.

Though it was fun, my day ended in a massive wreck:

Three years ago

That, to be honest, is probably not a surprise for those of you who have followed my story. Things haven’t changed much:

Three months ago

Three days ago

At the time, I decided that this sport would be placed in my designated “nothing” category.

For the time being, my “all” would go elsewhere.

My All

During high school, almost the entirety of my identity revolved around playing soccer. If there wasn’t a ball glued to my feet, it could have only meant one of two things: the administrators at school had taken it away for disrupting the hallways, or both of my legs were broken [Her legs were never actually broken; she’s just being dramatic. - FC].

While friends were out enjoying their teenage years on Friday nights, I was down at the park practicing until my feet blistered.

Timpanogos High School is known for two things: its 95% pass rate on the country-wide AP Calculus test, and its high number of soccer girls whose hands are decorated wit state rings.

Desiring to be a part of this crowd, I ramped up my practicing, and made it my number one goal to be a part of this team. This meant two-a-day practicing for the entirety of the summer, and the best fitness I had ever had. Because of this, it wasn’t much of a surprise that I ended up making the team, but the number of minutes I spent on the field during games might shock you.

This number was zero.

No, I did not bust an ankle or a knee or a collarbone. I just simply “wasn’t good enough” to be put in the game.

And back then I just took this message from my coach without a second thought. I didn’t obsess over the fact that I was putting in twice the amount of time as any other girl on the team; in fact, it made me work harder.

Only now—after placing my dedication into a different sport—do I realize how wrong this was.

Only now am I really appreciating that there has been an organization all along that encourages people to participate no matter what their level. One that includes everyone in the competitions, and where everyone can feel like they contribute to the team’s success.

This organization is NICA, and this sport is mountain biking.

No One Gets Left Behind

I only participated in one NICA race, and every one of the coaches knew my name and cheered me on at the end of the event. Not once did they tell me— or anyone— that they weren’t good enough to participate in the race; they did not punish hard work with time outs.

And this matters. I love NICA’s “no one gets left behind” philosophy and it makes me really happy to see them succeed.

NICA people are good people—and their numbers are growing quickly—but because they are a non-profit, they are having a hard time keeping up.

That’s why this year when I go to Leadville, I’m going to be racing on behalf of NICA. I am also going to be fundraising for them.

And that’s where I need your help.

[And it’s also where I — Fatty — step back into the picture.]

The Contest

Since this contest is happening right before my annual biggest race of the year — The Leadville 100 — and is what The Monster is fundraising for in order to gain entry into the race, I wanted to center the fundraising / contest question around two questions that are the absolute dead center of most of the conversations we are having at my house.

In just a moment, I’ll talk about those questions and how you can help settle them — predictively in one case, and definitively in the other — for us while doing a lot of good for an organization that is making a tremendous difference to a lot of kids in the US.

But first, let’s talk about the prizes you can win by participating.

Grand Prize 1:Ultimate Cycling Wardrobe from DNA Cycling

I don’t even know how to describe what a huge fan of DNA Cycling I’ve become. The quality of pretty much everything they make just blows me away.

And for the first grand prize I’m giving away, the CEO of DNA, Joe Sepulveda, is going to give you a call, talk with you about what kind of riding you like to do, where you ride, how you like your gear to fit, get your measurements, and then personally set you up with all the cycling clothes you could possibly need for the kind of riding you do.

Jerseys, socks, shorts, jackets, vests, bibs, knickers, gloves, everything you need for a complete, beautiful cycling wardrobe. 

You’ll note that I’m not getting super specific about exactly what this gear entails. That’s because the ultimate cycling wardrobe would be different for a mountain biker than for a roadie. It would be different for a man than a woman. It would be different for someone who lives in Florida than for someone who lives in Alaska.

But I will tell you this: Joe’s going to open up his candy shop, and you are going to get all the gear you need for the kind of riding you do in the place where you live.

Imagine: a prize that is literally crafted for you. How awesome would that be?

Well, someone will find out.

Grand Prize 2: A Year’s Supply of GU Energy Gel / Roctane

One of the important reasons The Monster is doing so well in this, her first year of racing, is that she’s a serious student. When The Hammer and I give her guidance on endurance racing, she listens and takes us seriously. As a result, she’s managed to leap over a lot of rookie endurance racing mistakes.

In particular, she’s wholeheartedly adopted our race nutrition strategy: A GU energy gel  or GU Roctane energy gel, every half hour. 

Here in the Fatty Family, we’re all very sold on how GU works. And some lucky winner is going to find out for themselves, by getting a committed cyclist’s year’s supply (12 boxes, with 24 gels per box)  of GU / GU Roctane energy gel.

And I will be happy to even provide suggestions on which twelve flavors to get, because I recently ordered twelve boxes of GU / GU Roctane for my own family (of course, for three actively racing cyclists, this won’t last close to a year):

• Cherry Lime Roctane: This, would be an amazing sherbet flavor and is my second-favorite GU flavor of all time. I love the little punch of tartness the lime gives it.
• Salted Watermelon: This is The Hammer’s favorite flavor of all time, and my fourth-favorite flavor. Salty is good, and these taste a lot like Jolly Rancher Watermelon candies.
• Chocolate Coconut Roctane: This is incredible: it tastes just like a Mounds bar. Just like it. It’s the most candy-like flavor of all the GUs. It’s my third-favorite flavor of all time.
• Cucumber Mint: I was amazed to find that I really love this. It’s mild, it’s different, it’s refreshing. It’s not on my top-five list, but it’s definitely going in a jersey pocket anytime I’m on a four-plus hour ride and at some point am going to need a gel that tastes clean and minty and refreshing.
• Strawberry-Kiwi Roctane: A classic. 
• Pineapple Roctane and Lemonade Roctane: I’m always so happy when I pull a yellow GU out of my pocket during a ride, because I know it’s going to be either Pineapple Roctane or Lemonade Roctane. And both are tied for being my fifth-favorite GU flavor. 
• Sea-Salt Chocolate Roctane and Caramel Macchiato: I am not sure why, but these are my absolute favorite GU flavors when the weather’s cool (below 70 degrees), but I don’t really go for them when the weather’s hot (85+ degrees). I’ve asked other people about this, though, and I’m pretty certain this is a “it’s just me” kind of thing.
• Big Apple: It’s tart and delicious and perfect. 
• Vanilla Orange: This is The Hammer’s favorite flavor of all time and is probably my sixth-favorite flavor. Either way, it’s a creamsicle, and there’s nothing bad in the world about it.

Strangely, my favorite GU flavor in the world — Root Beer — is being discontinued, and so is not on this list. But since I still have Cherry Lime, Salted Watermelon, Chocolate Coconut and Cucumber Mint, I’m not too broken up.

The value of this prize? $720.00. That’s a lot of gel, and is guaranteed to be the most useful prize you ever win.

4 First Prizes: GU Stroopwafels

GU has just started shipping GU Energy Stroopwafels, and they are so good (as an important member of the press, I got some before they were released to the public). They come in four fantastic flavors: Caramel Coffee, Salty’s Caramel, Wild Berries, and Salted Chocolate.

These are just amazing — the best thing to eat when you’ve just killed yourself on a big climb, need some calories, and want to reward yourself for the effort with something truly delicious. 

Plus they stay nice and flat in your jersey pocket, helping your figure stay all nice and bulgeless.

Four lucky winners will win a box (16 Stroopwafels per box) of Stroopwafels, in the flavor of your choice.

So if I have done my math correctly — and I have — that’s six extremely awesome prizes you can win in this contest.

And you don’t even know how the contest works yet. So let’s correct this problem right now. And then you can get out your Paypal password (or wallet or whatever) and hopefully win one of those fabulous prizes.

Contest Question 1: What Should Fatty’s Goal At Leadville Be This Year? 

At the end of my race last year — my fastest ever, with a finish time of 8:12 — I vowed to try to finish in 2016 in under eight hours. 

As I get close to race day, I know that’s unlikely to happen. I’ve needed to emphasize other things: job hunting, interviewing, getting settled in my new employment, and a new constant companion — a chronically painful hernia.

So for me, this year I’m just grateful to TrainerRoad that I’m in any shape at all. That in spite of all this, I am in good enough shape that I can still race.

But the sub-eight-hour dream is out the window for this year. 

Which leaves me in an interesting quandary: what should be my objective in the Leadville 100 this year? I can think of three good possibilities, all of which sound interesting, and could give me a great sense of satisfaction at the end of the race. 

• Race it as originally planned. I have a beautiful geared hardtail — a Felt Nine FRD frame built up with Enve M 50-Fifty wheels, a Rock Shox RS-1, and a SRAM XX1 drivetrain. It is, I believe, the best no-compromise XC racing hardtail a person could own for the Leadville 100. And I could race it with all my legs, lungs and heart to see if, even in my not-so-great shape, I can still finish in under nine hours. I think maybe I could.
• Race singlespeed. I love riding and racing singlespeed. And now my lightest, fastest singlespeed — my Stumpjumper singlespeed — has been upgraded with an RS-1 fork (can you tell I’m sold on the RS-1?), making me faster on the downhills than I’ve ever been. Could I win this category again? That of course depends on who else shows up. But I could at least make an attempt at the podium.
• Be The Hammer’s Domestique. The Hammer is the Leadville 100 women’s singlespeed record holder with a time of 9:50. This year, she hopes to set a new PR, which (unless there’s someone else faster than she is) would also be a new women’s SS record. And if I committed to riding with her, encouraging her and giving her a draft when I could, I think make a difference in her finish time. With my help, I think she could do it in under 9:30, to be honest. And also, we’d be adorable racing our matching singlespeeds.

Which will I do? Well, that will be up to you. How? By voting, of course. Specifically, by voting with your dollars. 

How? Simple. Below, just specify which you think I should do: race with gears, race singlespeed, or race for The Hammer. Then choose how much you’re willing to donate. The more you donate, the more votes you get (and as you’ll notice, the more you donate, the cheaper each vote is).

And here’s the thing: I hereby commit that, provided we fundraise at least $2500 for NICA here, I will abide by the results and will do as is specified here. As in, I will treat this vote as binding.

OK, let’s do it: 

What Should Fatty Focus on at Leadville?

Race on a Geared Bike Race on a Single Speed Be The Hammer’s Domestique

How Many Votes Do You Want to Place?

1 Vote: $5.00 USD 3 Votes: $10.00 USD 10 Votes: $20.00 USD 50 Votes: $50.00 USD

Question 2: How Close Will The Hammer’s and Monster’s Finishing Times Be?

There’s a friendly ongoing discussion at our house: how fast is The Monster? She’s  been riding in earnest for less than a year, but has done ridiculously well at each of these races.

• In her first race (True Grit Epic), The Monster finished just a few minutes behind The Hammer.
• In her second race (6 Hours of Frog Hollow), The Monster finished ahead of The Hammer.
• In her third race (Crusher in the Tushar), The Monster finished about an hour behind The Hammer.

Of course, The Hammer is The Hammer, and has not just years of base fitness, but also race savvy and endurance. So I personally think that The Hammer will finish right at an hour faster than The Monster (9:30 vs 10:30).

The Hammer thinks she’ll finish a little further ahead. The Monster thinks they’ll be closer than that.

I’d like you to settle this dispute, by voting below (as with the other contest, the more you donate, the more your vote is worth): do you think The Hammer will be at least an hour faster than The Monster, or will The Monster be less than an hour slower than The Hammer? 

Honestly, I can imagine it going either way. Let’s see how the voting goes…and then we’ll test that whole “wisdom of crowds” thing after the race.

Is Hammer MORE or LESS than 1hr Faster than Monster?

HAMMER More than 1hr Faster MONSTER Less than 1hr Slower

How Many Votes Do You Want to Place?

1 Vote: $5.00 USD 3 Votes: $10.00 USD 10 Votes: $20.00 USD 50 Votes $50.00 USD

How Prizes Are Drawn

For every vote you buy, you’ll also get a chance on my magically random spreadsheet. It’s that simple. Then, once this fundraiser is complete, we’ll do random drawings for the total number of chances/votes. No matter which contests you vote in or how you vote, you’ll be eligible to win in all of the prizes.

So: while the voting part is fun, it’s all to help NICA, and no matter what you’ll still have a chance to win. And I will email you when the contest ends, which will be August 8, the first day I’m in Leadville this year.

Updates Soon, and Frequently

I suspect that people will be interested in how the vote is going, long before the results are final. And that’s cool. I will do updates on where the results stand at least once a day, and more often than that when results change dramatically. 

Oh, and finally: yes, I was serious about holding my Rockwell Race Report hostage ’til we hit the $2500 mark. 

Hey, I’ve got to use the leverage I’ve got, right?

Thanks for your donation!

Now we waited.

Now we strategized.

“What order should we ride in?” I asked. Then, partially answering my own question, I said, “Levi should obviously go first.”

“Then you,” said Jeff. “I go third.”

“That sounds good,” said Levi.

“OK, what next?” I asked. “What’s our next tactic in our team strategy?” 

“Uh, go really fast?” Levi offered.

“And don’t fall down or get lost?” Jeff added.

“Is that all we’ve got?” I asked. “That’s the entirety of our strategy?”

“Hey, is that the new Apple Watch you’re wearing” Levi replied. OK, so it wasn’t really a reply. It was more just the next thing he said.

“Yes it is,” I said. “Here, try it on and let’s get your heart rate.”

So here, for the record, is Levi’s heart rate while waiting for dinner, immediately after an intense race strategy planning session:

“My resting heart rate has never been very low,” explained Levi.

For comparison, here’s Greg’s heart rate, taken six minutes later:

Oh, and because I know you’re curious, here’s mine, right now:

Evidently, I’m feeling pretty mellow as I type this (even mellower than I was feeling nine minutes ago, apparently).

Also, because I know you’re interested in every little detail in my life, I had the ravioli.

Plans, Altered

All that was really left to do before heading off toward Boggs (I don’t know why this forest is called “Boggs,” but it really is; it’s not just a silly nickname because of someone hilariously misspelled a forest that happened to contain a number of bogs) the next day was to go grocery shopping.

We just needed to decide whether to do that shopping the following morning, or take care of it that evening, after dinner.

For reasons that I shall never even attempt to understand, this was the most hotly-debated topic of the evening. Here, allow me to show you, via a pie chart:

After considerable and intense discussion (which I stopped following after the first couple minutes, due to being happy to do whatever, whenever), we agreed that we would get together the following morning to do the grocery shopping.

At which point we parted ways, Greg giving Jeff and me a ride back to our hotel, Levi headed elsewhere.

Two minutes after we began driving, Levi had caught us at a red light.  “Let’s do the shopping tonight,” he shouted.

So we headed to a grocery store. One of those grocery stores that  specializes in products that are similar to products you might find at a regular grocery store, except they’re marginally better for you and three times more expensive.

Guys Should Not Shop

The three of us (Greg, sensibly, wanted no part of this) got a grocery cart. We began walking up and down aisles, everyone too polite to actually put something in the cart, for fear it would meet the others’ disapproval.

Ten minutes in, we had put in bananas. And nothing else.

It began to look like this could take a while.

Finally, I said it. “I’m afraid to shop with you, Levi. I’m afraid that the overlap between what I consider food and what you consider food is an empty set.”

(No, I didn’t actually use those words. Figuring out how to phrase it this way took me twenty minutes.)

“Get whatever you want. I’m going to get whatever I want,” Levi replied. “One of the reasons I still ride every day is so I can eat how I like.”

Relieved, I grabbed a jar of Creamy Jif peanut butter.

Levi recoiled. “You’re not seriously going to get that, are you?”

I allowed that until now, I had in fact intended to get it.

Levi warily regards a pasta salad.

“It’s full of corn syrup!” Levi assured me, and we swapped the Jif out for a natural peanut butter, which remained unopened for the weekend.

Eventually, we bought chicken meatloaf (which was really good), enough water that we could each drink a gallon per hour for the entire eight-hour race, ten pounds of sliced turkey, five pounds of provolone, and some white bread. 

I consider the white bread my greatest victory. 

Oh, and I snuck in a jar of Nutella toward the end, too.

The Next Morning

“Jeff,” I said, as we ate breakfast the next morning, “Now that Dad’s not here, we need to re-grocerize.”

“Yeah,” said Jeff. 

Which is how we finally came to be in possession of a large bag of chocolate chip cookies, a twelve-pack of Coke Zero, another twelve-pack of Coke, and a four-pack of Starbucks Doubleshots.

Now we were ready to make the trek to Boggs.

Except I was far from ready. So far. So very very far. 

And in the next installment of this story, I’ll explain why. 

I do not ask for your pity, but I do ask for your understanding as today I do one very important thing, which I shall conveniently list for you:

1. Introduce you to the winner of the World Bicycle Relief fundraising contest, with the Specialized S-Works bike of your choice, outfitted with ENVE components.

Now that we have a plan, let’s get started, shall we?

Meet Tim W

I got up early on Friday, excited to build the spreadsheet for the drawing. I take this job seriously…and with no small amount of pleasure. I know that a lot of you would participate in these fundraisers even if there weren’t prizes, but that doesn’t mean they’re not fun to give out.

Then, when I got to Boggs forest and met Dave Thompson — my co-ambassador for WBR — I had him use random.org to pick a random number based on the rows in the spreadsheet.

Here’s that moment, captured forever (courtesy of Dave H):

The number? 2940. 

And that number corresponded to Tim W, who has been contributing to fundraisers I’ve been doing for years. Here he is, with his lovely wife Deedee:

I called Tim (many of the entries had corresponding phone numbers) and left a voicemail:

“Hi Tim. This is Fatty. If you like really nice bikes and vacations, you should give me a call back.”

And then I sent him an email saying essentially the same thing.

Then I went racing.

Later that evening, Tim called me. “Is this a prank? Is this real or are you punking me?” he asked.

“It’s real,” I said. “What bike are you going to pick?”

“I don’t know yet,” Tim said. “I need to do some serious thinking.”

However, since Tim does live in Northern California and loves visiting Utah (once, during a vacation they were taking to Zions National Park, Tim and Deedee came and watched The Hammer and me race a couple laps of 24 Hours of Frog Hollow), he does plan to visit Utah. 

So that much is certain. One tough decision down, one extremely tough decision to go!

I asked Tim to send me an email telling me a little bit about himself: 

I could not believe the message that I received Friday night. I returned what I thought was a prank call, to get Fatty on the other end. He informed me of the fantastic luck I had. I was the winner of his latest fundraiser for WBR. My name is Tim. I live in Livermore, CA. and have been following The Fat Cyclist for years as well as participating in his fundraisers, never expecting to win, just knowing they were always for a great cause.

I do not race but ride quite a bit recreationally. The bike will be way beyond my abilities, whatever I get. Now I have some decisions to make.

Thank You Fatty for the entertaining blog posts that you do, keep up the good work, as well as Thanks to WBR, Specialized, ENVE and SRAM. 

I think that’s really well put.

Now, for all of you who are not Tim W, please take a moment to leave a note of congratulations to him, as well as bike / component mix you think he should get (i.e., what you would have gotten).

And don’t worry, folks. You may not have won this time, but the Grand Slam is coming. And the quantity and quality of prizes is going to be outrageous.

Believe me, there is nothing in the world that makes you quite as self-conscious as grocery shopping with Levi Leipheimer.

Anyway, the contest is over, and I’m working on the spreadsheet right now. You’ll be excited — as I am — to know that we raised $25,168 with this contest!

I’m taking care of making final adjustments to the spreadsheet, and then, as seems only proper, I’ll ask my fellow WBR Ambassador and co-owner of this contest Dave Thompson to pick a random number (using random.org) corresponding to the numbers I’ve assigned everyone in the prize spreadsheet.

And then, this evening, once the day’s racing is done, we’ll send out an email to the winner.

So, start watching your email tonight, OK? 

Of course, I have no idea whether I’ll get Internet, so if you don’t hear from us, that doesn’t mean all is lost.

Let me conclude with a big giant Thank you. Your generosity in this contest will put bikes under 171 students. With an average of three people being affected by each bike, that’s 513 lives you’ve just made better. In a measurable, meaningful, practical way.

So: on behalf of the 513 people who are going to have chances they never would otherwise had, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Once again, I am pretty much overwhelmed by the fact that I have the nicest, most generous friends a person could ever ask to have.

And you won’t just win a bike, either. You also will win a trip to — your choice — Utah or California, where you’ll receive your built-up bike, get custom-fitted for it, and then spend a weekend riding with my fellow WBR Ambassador Dave Thompson and me.

For this last day, I brought out the big guns. Specifically, Dave is going to describe if you choose to have your biking weekend in his neighborhood, Santa Cruz.

If You’re a Mountain Biker…

The Santa Cruz area offers a wide choice of rides, from beginner to the “sick edit” category.  

On the beginner side I would recommend Wilder Ranch: it offers some very nice trails through open meadows and trees that range from easy to moderate difficulty with nice views of the Ocean as you climb from the sea up into the mountains.  

Moving up the scale Demo Forest, located high up in the Santa Cruz mountains, offers moderately difficult climbs and a variety of singletrack decent options. One of the new trails, the Flow Trail, which is more than half complete, has a nice smooth descent through the redwoods with high banked turns, gentle rise and falls with no drops or big surprises.  

The Braille trail has loads of steep sections complete with jumps and teeter totters.  The nice thing about Demo is all the single track options start at the same place on the top and end at the same fire road on the bottom so you can easily ride back up and ride as many of them as you’d like. 

The most challenging is a short drive away and one of my favorite spots, Henry Coe Park.  The only problem with Coe is the climbing is a bit steep.  I took Carlos there a few weeks ago and we did a 32 mile ride with a bit over 6k feet of climbing. Carlos said it was the hardest thing he has ever done.  There is no real easy way to ride in Coe so I would only recommend this for the advanced rider or the young (like Carlos).  Coe is 87,000 acres so rides range from a short 10 miles to as far as you want to go. A nice collection of single track descents through forests of oak and Manzanita followed by brutal fire road climbs but with nice scenic views well worth the suffering.  

If You’d Rather Ride Road

In and around the Santa Cruz area there are many road rides to choose from.  One of my favorite easy rides is a bike/walking trail that winds along the bluffs of Santa Cruz with spectacular views of the ocean.  The trail starts in Santa Cruz, by the Boardwalk and takes you up to Wilder Ranch about a 12 mile ride round trip and almost dead flat. You are almost guaranteed to see surfers and sea lions as you pass the lighthouse.

For more difficult and longer rides all you need to do is head east up any of a number of great roads that climb up through the redwood forests in the Santa Cruz mountains.  

One of my favorites is Eureka Canyon, a small less traveled road that climbs gently up through the forest to Summit Road. From there you can take the optional additional climb up to Loma Prieta avenue were you are rewarded with spectacular views of the ocean, see pic “Loma Pieta”.  

From there you can head north along the top of the Santa Cruz mountain range and descend back down into Santa Cruz by a couple of options, depending on how long you want your ride to be.  There are so many great roads to choice from a day in the Santa Cruz mountains can be as long and hard as you want.  

Then there is also the beach. I’m sure we could get our hands on a few fat tire bikes; that would make for some fun.  

Something for Everyone

As for non biking, all these areas are also great for hiking and also range in difficulty accordingly.  There are also several good wineries in the area and the Monterey Bay aquarium is only a short drive away.   

As for the beach house we have rented this place — The Black Pearl — for the past several years:

Who doesn’t want to stay in a place with a pirate name?

It is walking distance to the harbor, several good restaurants and the house is overlooking the ocean. 

A Final Word From Fatty

No matter what bike you choose, or which components, or which place to go riding, this is a ridiculous prize, and having Dave along guarantees it’s going to be a great time. Dave — along with the whole Thompson family — is one of the nicest, best people you will ever meet.

Whoever wins this prize — which ends today — is going to be incredibly lucky. 

But you can’t win if you don’t enter. And how do you enter? Well, buy some Fat Cyclist gear, or make a donation to WBR. It’s that easy. You’ll be doing some good for the most practical, effective, instantly-life-changing charity in the world. You’ll be getting the best gear I’ve ever offered (if you’re buying gear, that is). 

And you just might win an incredible bike and vacation.

Good luck!

PS: I’m flying to San Francisco in 20 minutes, to meet up with Jeff D, who won another of my contests. I think it might be only fitting to have him do the drawing for this winner tomorrow.

I’m in Austin this week, doing work things, working as workers work when they’re at work. As proof of this, I offer a photo of the colossal, inseparable wad of  keys (2), key fobs (2), key rings (3) and pieces of garbage (1) the Hertz company makes me carry around as punishment for having rented one of their cars:

I do not show this as a sly way to ask for your pity. No, wait. Actually I do.

(Pssst. Hey you. Stick around for a minute. I’m going to try to bore the rest of the readers away to another page, so it’ll be just you and me.)

So. Anyway. With me being in Austin, and my bikes being in Utah, there’s not a lot for me to write about today. 

So maybe you should just head on over to Red Kite Prayer or Bike Snob NYC or something. I like those sites. In fact, I think I’ll go read them right now. You should too.

Kind Regards,

OK, is everyone else gone? You’re the only one who stuck around?

Good.

I’m going to tell you something, and it’s really important you don’t tell anyone else. (But first, I’m going to quit using these “whisper italics.”)

Early this week, I launched what I consider to be the most ambitious fundraising contest I’ve ever launched. Your choice of the best version (S-Works) of any Specialized frame — arguably, in many cases, the best in their class. Your choice of the best wheels and cockpit in the world — anything from ENVE. Your choice of the incredible SRAM drivetrains and brakes.

And a fitting and vacation — Santa Cruz, Santa Rosa, or Utah — to get used to this amazing bike you’ve won.

Basically, I asked myself, “What would completely make people’s heads spin around, forcing them to have no choice but to sign up for this contest? What would be so compelling they wouldn’t be able to help but buy all kinds of gear and make a contribution to WBR to boot, just so they’d have a chance at winning?” And then I asked people and companies to help me build that contest. And they did. 

And here’s the good news for you, and you alone (since you’re the only person reading this): so far, the WBR contributions and Team Fatty Gear purchase numbers have been…moderate.

I’m not saying they’ve been bad, mind you. Hey, $7K+ worth of contributions in the first 48 hours of a contest is something most fundraisers would be happy to boast about.

Of course, most fundraisers aren’t showing off a prize that would retail at $15 – $20K (depending on what bike and wheels you choose, as well as where you travel and where you’re flying from). 

But see, that’s a good thing. For you. And for you alone. Because I have this idea, which I’m going to drop into whisper italics for, just so nobody overhears:

Buy the gear you want and / or make a donation, and then don’t tell anyone about it. 

And I won’t tell anyone, either.

Because right now, considering the hugeness of the prize and the relative moderate number of purchases and contributions made, this is quite possibly the best bet you’ll ever get on winning a mindbendingly incredible prize. 

Not to mention you’ll for sure make a big difference, thanks to the work you’re helping WBR do.

Not to mention the handmade Italian cycling gear you’ll be looking (and riding) so dashing in.

You’ll be doing something good for the world, wearing a really great-looking FatCyclist.com jersey, and…just maybe…getting the most outrageously perfect-for-you bike you can literally imagine.

Just keep it to yourself, OK? We wouldn’t want to wind up having this thing go big.

1. The first part of the prize is the dreamiest of dream bikes: any Specialized S-Works frame, paired with any ENVE wheels and cockpit, paired with your choice of SRAM components.
2. The second part of the prize is a trip. Either to Utah to ride the three mesas in the St. George area and stay at the Gooseberry Yurt; or to Santa Cruz, to stay on the beach and ride the road. Or to Santa Rosa and do a private version of Levi’s Granfondo.
3. You enter by either buying Fatty gear, or by making a donation. Either way (or any combination), each dollar gets you an entry. The contest ends at the end of April and the drawing happens soon after.

Want more details? Read the post I just spent four hours writing, smart guy.

Buy Gear, Make a Donation, Win the Ultimate Dream Bike and Vacation 

I have put together a huge prize to help raise money for World Bicycle Relief. 

Huge.

But more importantly — oh so much more importantly — than the fact that it’s a big prize is the fact that it’s a big prize that is going to be really truly customized to the winner.

So what the big prize will be depends on what kind of riding you like, and how you’d want your dream bike customized, and where you would want to ride it once you got it.

And of course, along the way we’re going to raise a fantastic amount of money for World Bicycle Relief. I’m going to talk more about the cause and how the contest works in a minute.

But first, let’s talk about the prize. Because I am so excited about it — both for what the ride is, and how it came together.

The Frame

The first question the winner of this contest is going to need to ask is, “Which of all the absolutely top-end bikes Specialized makes do I want?

That, however, may be too narrow of a question to start out with. You may want to broaden it to, “Do I want a mountain bike, or a road bike?”

If you want a road (or Tri bike), your answer might be the S-Works version of several amazing frames: The Tarmac (my choice), the Roubaix (The Hammer’s choice), or even the Shiv (both The Hammer’s and my choice).

Or maybe your answer is “mountain bike.” In which case maybe you should get  the S-Works version of the Epic. Or the Stumpjumper (on which both The Hammer and I have had our respective fastest Leadville times). Or the Enduro.

Really, you couldn’t go wrong with any of these; the “S-Works” version of their frames means it’s the lightest, strongest, best version of that bike that exists. (And also, these are just examples; maybe you want a Crux or an Amira or something else…and that’s just fine.) 

And now, for just a second, I’m going to ask you to join me in patting my own back. Because the Specialized frame you’ll be getting…well, I’m giving that to you, in a way.

How? Well, one of the really amazing perks WBR Ambassadors get is a bike from Specialized. But, between the two of us, The Hammer and I already have eight Specialized bikes. (And we love each of them. A lot.)

So I checked with WBR and asked if they’d check with Specialized and see if we could convert the bike I’d be given into an awesome prize for someone reading the contest. 

And Specialized, being an incredible WBR supporter, not only said “yes,” but  upgraded the bike donation beyond what I would have been given to the top-end S-Works version.

Nice.

The Wheels and Cockpit

In my most recent post, I talked about how much I love ENVE wheels and components. This is not even remotely hyperbole. My Tarmac SL4 has ENVE wheels, bar, and stem. And it is — and has been — the most perfect bike I have ever owned (the wheels have not needed to be trued even once in the two-plus years I’ve ridden them). It’s simply my own true dream bike. 

The same goes for my Specialized Stumpjumper singlespeed, with ENVE XC wheels, stem and bar: it’s just a perfect bike. Beautiful, light, and incredibly strong wheels. 

Seriously, I don’t believe there are better bike wheels made anywhere in the world.

You are going to love them as much as I do, whether you get super aero road wheels (like the SES 6.7s) or all-purpose racing mountain bike wheels like the M50 Fifty. Or something else.

ENVE has you covered.

And if you need a little help and conversation picking out wheels, I will be happy to spend countless hours on the ENVE website, obsessing over matching your bike to the perfect wheels for you. 

And I bet we can get Jake at ENVE to weigh in with an opinion, too.

The Components

I don’t even know where to start with SRAM. For one thing, they are outrageously generous with their support of World Bicycle Relief, and that wins them quite a few brownie points. 

But more importantly, have you seen how freaking amazing the XX1 drivetrain is? It’s changed everything about how I think about shifting gears on mountain bikes. Specifically, I no longer think of it as a dark art that sometimes works, but only if I’ve been a really good little boy. 

Here’s my point. SRAM is going to hook you up with a world-class, top-of-the-line drivetrain, and brakes, and everything else you need to go with your incredible road or MTB machine. 

You are going to be in bike heaven.

But we aren’t done yet.

Where Do You Want to Go?

What’s the point of having an amazing new bike if you don’t have an amazing new place to take it out for your first ride?

Oh, I think we can help you there. And — like with the rest of this contest — what you like is going to factor into what the prize is.

Suppose you choose a mountain bike, and you’d like to ride some of the most amazing trails you could ever imagine, against a beautiful desert backdrop.

In that case,  we are going to fly you to Salt Lake City, where your built-up bike will be waiting for you at Bountiful Bikes.

There, Taylor Felt is going to spend a couple hours with you fine tuning the fit of your new bike to you, using Specialized’s Body Geometry Fit System. And as someone who has had a bike fit using this system (as has The Hammer), I assure you: your bike will fit perfectly after Taylor is done.

Then we’ll swing by ENVE HQ, to show off your bike and get a tour of the place.

After that, we’re off to Hurricane, UT for a weekend at the famous Gooseberry Yurt, where my friend Kenny will act as your guide, mountain biking the three most amazing mesas you can imagine.

And you’ll have company: me (of course), and Dave Thompson, a Best Friend of Fatty, grillmaster extraordinaire, and fellow 2015 WBR Ambassador. 

And that’s not all Dave is contributing to this fundraiser. He’s the one who’s buying your plane ticket. 

Yup, we’re teaming up for this contest. We’re each giving up a little something to make this the most amazing contest we can.

And we are not done yet.

Because we understand that maybe you will want a road bike. And while you’re still welcome to come to Utah to pick it up and ride (in which case I will be happy to show you some of the best of what the Tour of Utah covers), maybe you might like to spend your first few rides on something a little more…coastal.

Like Santa Cruz. Or Santa Rosa.

Yes, if your preference is to get a road bike (or if you’d rather MTB in CA than in Utah), we will have your bike built close to one of these cycling meccas, get you fit there (in Santa Rosa, the top-notch NorCal sport will build your bike and fit you for it), and meet you there for a couple days of riding.

Here’s Dave, taking in the amazing scenery midride in Santa Cruz:

Oh, and here’s the view from the spot Dave’s got picked out to stay, should we go riding in Santa Cruz:

I have to say, he makes a pretty good case for that place.

Here’s the bottom line: I am going to work with Specialized, ENVE, and SRAM to get you the bike of your dreams. Then Dave and I are going to make sure you get it built and fit, and then take you on some incredible rides — whatever kind of riding you like. Mellow, fast, technical, relaxed, whatever sounds awesome to you.

Basically, we are going to set you up with the most amazing bike plus vacation we can, using all the resources we have.

So. To me it looks like the total prize value for this trip is around $15,000-$20,000, between the bike, the trip, the fit, the place to stay, and incidentals.

Have we got your interest?

Why This Matters

Here’s a set of questions worth asking: 

• Why am I willing to give up a bike? (Trust me, I’ve been dreaming of a Specialized Crux for a looooong time)
• Why is Dave willing to buy plane tickets or rent a cottage on the beach?
• Why is Specialized willing to give me one of their top-end frames, at a value between $3500 and $6000?
• Why is ENVE willing to give me around $7,000-worth of wheels and components?
• Why is SRAM willing to open the doors to their candy shop, setting you up with around $2000-$4000-worth of parts and components?

The “why” is pretty simple. We’re cyclists and bike companies; we love bikes and what they can do for anyone. Every single one of us is a believer in what World Bicycle Relief does and how they work.

I’ve been to Zambia and seen how a bike, given to a schoolchild, makes it possible for that child to stay in school. To get water for the family. To get a better job. To have a better life.

A Buffalo Bike in the hands of a healthcare volunteer means the ability to see more patients, to get them the attention and meds they need. To literally save lives.

These bikes — these tough, black, strong, beautiful, heavy, black bikes — improve people’s lives instantly. These bikes change the trajectory of their lives permanently.

If you’re looking for a charity that uses what you love to make a real difference in the world…well, here it is.

How The Contest Works

In keeping with the theme of choice in the rewards contest, how you enter is up to you. 

The first way is by buying any FatCyclist.com gear from my catalog site. You can buy a jersey, shorts, a vest, arm warmers, socks, a hoodie…anything and everything.

Each dollar of your purchase automatically gets you an entry into the contest.

So yes: If you buy a Race Fit Short Sleeve Jersey, Race Bib Shorts, and a pair of socks, you not only get an amazing kit that shows your support of Team Fatty and WBR, you also get 238 entries in the contest (237.85 actually, but I round up). 

So, if you’ve been kinda on the fence about pre-ordering Fat Cyclist gear this year…well, this might help nudge you in the right direction.

The second way is to simply donate at my Donation page. There, you can donate in the following increments:

• $10 Donation
• $25 – 1 Wheelset
• $50 – 1 Mechanics Toolkit
• $147 – 1 Bike
• $735 – 5 Bikes
• $1,470 – 10 Bikes

Of course, you can buy multiples of each or any of these options…so if you wanted to donate $100 (and get 100 entries in the contest), just get two of the $50 option. Easy!

And yes, you can mix and match: If you buy a t-shirt ($19.95) and donate $25 (enough to buy a wheelset), you get a total of 45 entries in the contest.

The third way is free. You can have an entry into this contest by sending me (email fatty@fatcyclist.com, subject line: Ultimate Dream Bike Essay) a 200-word essay on your favorite three things about me. You may enter as often as you like, because I love hearing people’s favorite things about me.  However, each essay must be unique, topical, and in reasonably-formed English. In other words, no auto-generated text. And don’t think I can’t tell. 

And be sure you get the subject line exactly right, or the email rule I have to gather these entries won’t work on your entry. And that would be sad.

Questions You Might Have

I don’t know for sure whether you might actually have these questions, but it seems possible, because I had these questions, and figure you are exactly the same as me. 

Q. When does this contest end?
A. It ends the last day of April, at the end of the day. I’ll do the drawing in the first week of May.

Q. I purchased Fat Cyclist Gear before this contest started. What happens to me?
A. Your purchase is automatically retrofitted into this contest. Congratulations, you may have won and you didn’t even know you were playing!

Q. I purchased Fat Cyclist Gear before this contest started…and now it looks like you’re extending the pre-order. Am I going to have to wait longer to get the stuff I ordered?
No, you won’t. We’ve ordered everything from the pre-order, and just did a bunch of multiplication-style math, adding on additional stuff in the proportions we think are smart.

This means that your pre-order stuff will still get here in late May as originally promised. And since we added stuff on speculatively, there’s a very good chance that if you order during this contest you’ll still get your stuff in late May (but it may be later if we have to extend the order again). 

Q. What if I win, but I am more of a casual cyclist and don’t want / need a super-nice high-end bike.
When we did a contest similar to this last year, it turns out that the winner, Heidi, liked hiking more than biking. And so we turned the prize into a weekend of hiking in Zions National Park.

If you don’t want the bike, I’ll bet you know someone who does. Or if you don’t, Dave and I will give NICA a call and we know for sure there will be someone there who can put it to good use. Either way, you’ve still got a great trip to a beautiful spot. Our objective is not to impress you with our riding skill and tear your legs off (unless that’s what you want).

And if you’re a woman and don’t really want to spend a weekend with a couple of smelly men, we can arrange to have you ride with The Hammer and / or Amy (Dave’s wife) instead. 

Our objective is to give you the bike / vacation combo that is what you want. And we’ll tweak and twist what the prize is ’til it’s perfect for you.

Q. You and Dave are working on this fundraiser together, but you each have separate fundraising pages for WBR. Where is the money earned by this fundraiser going — to Fatty’s page, or to Dave’s page?
To Dave’s page. I expect to do the fundraising for my page in July, when I kick off the Grand Slam for Zambia. 

If you have any additional questions, post them in the comments and I’ll be happy to get to them, either right in the comments or by amending this post.

Thanks very much for your help. I know that Dave, Specialized, WBR, SRAM, ENVE, and I are all very excited about this contest. It was an exciting project to have so many companies and people come together and give something toward something we all truly believe in.

Click here for Team Fatty gear, or click here for the donation page.

A “Don’t Forget to Buy a Jersey” Note from Fatty: The 2015 Fat Cyclist gear pre-order is in full swing. But this isn’t just a pre-order. No indeed. This is a full-on awesome way for you to make a huge difference in people’s lives, because 50% of the proceeds of everything in this pre-order is going to World Bicycle Relief.

Yes, that’s right, you’re simultaneously getting some outrageously nice, Italian-made cycling clothes and you’re making it possible for a child in Africa to get to school, get water, and improve her job opportunities.

That’s pretty darned cool.

Click here for details on all the gear, or click here to go right to my gear catalog.

Karma

Like I do about thirty thousand times per day, I was checking my phone, deleting email that I had no intention of reading.

This email consists mostly of press releases about Kickstarters for revolutionary bike products, inquiries about advertising on the site, and pitches for “guest posts.” 

Almost none of this email, sadly, is offers to give me bicycles for free.

“Almost” being an important key word in the above sentence.

So this email caught my eye: 

Like many people, I had in fact entered a contest sponsored by RideBiker Alliance and Cannondale a few weeks ago. But I don’t win drawings. No. I’m the guy who tells other people they win.

So this had to be clever spam. Or some other kind of scam. Right?

Still, there was a phone number, and — after checking to make sure the area code wasn’t to some kind of offshore number where I’d be billed $17.95 per hour — I called, acutely aware for the first time that probably every single person who gets a “you won” email and phone number from me must go through the same set of suspicions.

But it was real. The guy on the other end of the line — who sounded as excited as I always feel when winners call me to find out if this is real — assured me that I had in fact been selected at random to win my choice of a Cannondale Scalpel or FS-I. 

I got off the phone and walked into the kitchen, stunned. 

“I’m pretty sure,” I said, “that I’ve just won a bike.”

And then I spent the night trying to decide which of these two bikes — the Scalpel 29 Carbon 3 and the F-SI Carbon 2 — I wanted more.

And to be honest, I am still not absolutely positively certain. I’ve given a tentative response, but have another day or two to change my mind. I welcome your suggestions in the comments.

Confirmation

I confess to harboring doubts. Even after the phone call, I thought it was possible that I had been fooled. That I had been tricked into revealing personal information I shouldn’t have and now was about to have my bank account drained. (Our family’s just a little sensitive on this issue because we actually were victims of identity theft on a pretty serious scale just a few months ago.)

But then, yesterday afternoon, friends started forwarding this email to me, along with the note “DID YOU SERIOUSLY JUST WIN A BIKE?” 

So yes, it’s officially official. The guy who gives away bikes (I no longer have any idea how many bikes I’ve given away in the lifetime of this blog, but would guess the number is close to 25 or 30) in drawings for good causes…just won a bike, in a drawing, for a good cause.

Karma is awesome.

I’m Keeping It

As you no doubt know, I’m an athlete ambassador for World Bicycle Relief for 2015, and so right now I’m putting pretty much everything I think of through the “how can I use this to help WBR?” filter.

For example, WBR athlete ambassadors get — as a very awesome perk — to pick out a bike to keep. But I’ll be giving that bike away as part of a contest (more about that soon).

So, as you can imagine, upon finding that I was about to get a brand new Cannondale Scalpel or F-SI, I asked myself, “Should I give this away, make it part of a contest?”

And then I remembered: several times, people who have won bikes from me have suggested that they were going to re-contest their prize bikes. And each time, I’ve asked them to please not do that. That when a bike manufacturer gives me a bike to give away, the thing they hopefully get out of that is great publicity from a happy winner.

So — winner’s guilt out of the way — I’m very happy to say that this bike will not be part of a contest. It’s mine. I’m keeping it.

And I’m incredibly stoked to get it and ride it.

One Down, Four to Go

The RideBiker Alliance is a pretty amazing program: get people and companies to work together to support bike clubs across the US. And Cannondale is being very awesome about supporting RideBiker by giving away five bikes with them (mine was just the first!). In fact, they’re giving one away in conjunction with the next four US Cup Pro XC races.

So allow me to recommend you take a moment to learn more about RideBiker, and to enter the contest:  Click here. 

PS: I seriously am still considering how amazingly surreal this is.

And I didn’t want to feel left out.

So, for the last few days of The Great Fatsby pre-order (now through Wednesday), you can use the FAT20 promo code to knock 20% off your pre-order. 

Not just on the book, either. On everything, including the bundles, which are already nicely discounted.

Which means, for example, that you could buy the Great Fatsby Super Bundle—a signed and inscribed book, the long-sleeve wool tec-merino jersey, and the t-shirt—for $123.96. 

Which, if you’re not too good at math, means that you’re getting the signed and inscribed book and the t-shirt for free. 

Killer.

And just in case you are wondering, yes, the FAT20 promo code will work on your whole order (with the exception of the $10 WBR donation — a $10 donation is still a $10 donation).

But Wait! There’s More! 

Even with the 20% discount, you’re still getting the cool stuff that makes this pre-order really awesome (besides the fact that you’re going to be getting around 350 pages of my very best work, newly edited and footnoted practically into oblivion).

• Chances at winning the Ibis bike of your choice: I don’t know if anyone else is giving away the Mojo HD3 that everyone is raving about (seriously, everyone is going nuts about this bike). Or you can get my personal choice, the Tranny 29. Or a Ripley 29. Or a Hakkalugi Disc. Whatever your pleasure, SRAM will gear it up with absolute top-end parts.
• Chances at getting into the Leadville 100. That’s right, you and I could be hanging out and freaking out over racing the hardest-to-get-into, highest-in-America mountain bike century there is. That would rock.
• 25% of the profits go to WBR: That is a serious donation. And the cool thing is, that 25% donation is going to get matched, dollar for dollar, turning it into a 50% donation. Killer.

Curious About the Jersey and How It Fits?

One of the things I’m really excited about in this pre-order is the Team Fatty Tecno-Merino Wool Long-Sleeve Jersey.

it’s an incredibly comfortable and beautiful jersey—something you could wear both on and off the bike.

Wear it with a base layer or right against the skin—either way works great.

And I’ve got a size for most everyone: all the way from XXS to 5XL. Those of you who haven’t been able to get a FatCyclist jersey before because I haven’t had sizes small or large enough…well, now you can.

And they’re made in Italy. Yeah. 

And with the FAT20 code, you can score one for under $100 now. Yes, a long-sleeve, high-quality, Tecno-Merino jersey for less than $100. 

But quite a few of you have wondered what size will fit you. And I wondered the same thing. So The Hammer went to DNA Cycling, my partner for these jerseys, and tried on a couple of jerseys with the same cut. These should hopefully help you make a decision.

For reference, here’s a little bit about how tall and heavy The Hammer and I are right now (and yes, we’re definitely moving into our off-season weight):

• Lisa (aka The Hammer): 5’7”, 128lbs.
• Me: 5’7”, 168lbs. (Yeah, yeah, I’ve put ten pounds on since September.)

Here’s The Hammer wearing a size Medium: 

As you can see, it’s a loose fit, even though she’s got a t-shirt underneath. She could easily wear a Small for a closer fit, which is probably what she’ll get for herself. That said, sizing up to a Medium means she can wear it more as a comfortable, loose-fitting sweater. 

(Unfortunately, DNA didn’t have any of the Small in stock, so I can’t show you how those would fit her)

And here I am, wearing a Medium: 

I’m wearing this right against the skin. It fits perfect for riding: not tight, but close-fitting.

If I were just wearing this casually, I’d want a size Large: 

Still fits great, but a more relaxed, looser feel. 

Oh, and just to give you a feel for what the back of the jersey looks like: 

There are three traditional jersey pockets, as well as a zipped additional pocket in the back for your phone. That little white rectangle in the bottom center is reflective. 

And here’s a close-up of the color and texture of the wool, as well as the nice easy-pull zipper (the zipper pull is on the left, in case you care):

Using the FAT20 promo code, you can get this jersey on its own for $99.96, with a signed copy of the book for $111.92, or with the Great Fatsby t-shirt and signed, inscribed copy of The Great Fatsby for $123.96.

Meet Dan Wuori

One last thing here: Dan Wuori, the hilarious genius behind the back page column in Velo magazine, has written the Foreword (along with a Middleword…and a Backword…which I’ll get to in another post) for The Great Fatsby. If you buy a book with a signed inscription today, I’ll get him to sign the book as well. 

Which, honestly, raises the value of the book to that of a fully-tricked-out Yugo. Easily.

Why Am I Doing This?

I haven’t traditionally done discounts, and I am a little bit nervous about this one. But here’s the thing: I’m self-publishing this, and the more books I order from the printer, the less each costs. At this point, I haven’t yet hit the 1000 book price break.

Which means that sales aren’t as awesome as I’d like them to be. Which bums me out just a titch, because I am outrageously proud of this book. It’s about 350 pages (yes, longer than I originally anticipated, thanks to a lot of footnotes) of what I consider to be some of my very best work.

And from a purely selfish, contest-oriented perspective, the lower sales combined with the fact that I’m giving away a bike and an entry into Leadville,  means that this might not be a bad thing for you to jump on, because your chances of scoring a bike in this contest are probably somewhat better than they usually are in my contests.

Regardless of whether you buy one thing, lots of things, or nothing, I do want to thank you for reading this blog. It’s been an awesome (almost) ten years.

A Note from Fatty: A few weekends ago, The Hammer, the twins and I got to spend a couple of days hiking and camping with Heidi, the winner of the contest The Hammer ran as a fundraiser for World Bicycle Relief. 

Heidi is awesome. Also, she dyes yarn for a living. If you’ve never known that yarn can be beautiful (I didn’t, for example), you should check out Heidi’s Etsy store: Grant Creek Yarns. 

Heidi agreed to write up the story from the weekend, giving me a nice little day off (for about the first time ever, I have had to do exactly no editing to this guest post).

Also, Heidi’s post gives me a great chance to remind you that I’ve got a new contest going on right now — a chance to come race on a team with Levi Leipheimer and me. This contest — which benefits Forget Me Not Farm — ends a week from today, so you better go donate soon.

Heidi’s Guest Post: The Gooseberry Yurt / Hiking Zions Weekend

Hi, I’m Heidi, the lucky winner of the Gooseberry Yurt Vacation, here to report on our grand adventure.

I was absolutely delighted to win this trip, and spending a weekend hiking in Zion was right up my alley. Lisa and Elden were brave souls to open their lives up to a complete stranger from Montana. I was tickled to hear that Elden’s twins would be able to join us; the more the merrier, and it was fun to hear their take on things.

Due to the timing of my flight along with the long (beautiful!) drive, it would have been fairly late by the time we reached the yurt. Rather than unpack and set up in the dark, Lisa switched up the plans and we spent the first night at an elegant home about an hour from Zion that was made available by her friends. There I learned fascinating, possibly little-known facts about Lisa and Elden: Lisa was a contestant on The Price is Right (we watched the video!), and Elden makes a kick-ass cup of French press coffee.

We packed a lot into the weekend. I had never been to Zion, and Lisa was excited to show it off. On Saturday morning, we hiked four miles up to Observation Point, gaining 2,100 feet in elevation. The website for Zion http://www.zionnational-park.com/ describes it well:

“Spend a few hours trudging up a steep mountainside to one of the best viewpoints offered by the list of Zion’s classic trails. This challenging path is complete with dizzying drop offs and eye popping scenery looking down into Zion Canyon. The maintained path zigzags its way up the steep mountainside beside familiar reddish Navajo sandstone before venturing through Echo Canyon, a deep gorge filled with water gnawed sandstone pockets. Near the top of the trek you will see white rock; this layer is known as the Temple Cap formation. Beyond Echo Canyon walls drop sharply, giving way to spectacular views. At the trails end, looking down into the canyon is a spectacular display of stone sculptures contrasted by the bluest of skies – thanks to the clean air of southern Utah.”

There was so much to see, and the views kept changing along the way.

Lisa pointed out that the four one-mile sections up alternated between comfortable and steeper/more challenging. It reached 93 degrees in the park that day, and I had to call breaks to catch my breath on the final mile (but I think the twins secretly cheered when I did). Lisa, of course, looked fresh as a daisy.

Here is the stunning view that awaited us at the top:

After lunch, we were ready to walk up the Narrows River. It was fun to watch so many people of different ages, shapes, sizes, and nationalities bobbing and laughing in the river. I was glad I took Lisa’s suggestion and used one of the walking sticks left by earlier waders, otherwise I might have ended up in the drink.

After picking up some fantastic brick oven pizza from the Pizza Wagon in the town of Hurricane, we headed to the yurt. It’s quite a ride in! It was later than anticipated, so we were fortunate to have an almost-full moon to light our way. The yurt is a camper’s paradise with very comfortable accommodations. (Thanks so much, Kenny and Heather! I’m sorry you weren’t able to join us, I would have loved to meet you.) Elden built an admirable fire; s’mores were consumed and we enjoyed a camp song the twins learned at Camp Kesem. The next morning brought a quick rainfall and Elden snapped a shot of this gorgeous rainbow:

Yup, it was pretty tough having to wake up to that view… Absolutely amazing. What a great place.

We returned to the park and hiked to the three Emerald Pools. Late in the season, they were lower than Lisa had ever seen them, but they were still very beautiful.

And then wham, bam, it was time to hit the road and get me back to the airport for my return flight to Missoula.

I can’t thank Lisa, Elden, and the girls enough for accepting me into their pack for a weekend and sharing this wonderful adventure with me. I was made to feel so welcome, and I came away with some lovely memories. Many, many thanks.

As a reminder for how my weekend came about… World Bicycle Relief made an excellent decision in choosing Lisa to be a Team WBR Ambassador. Lisa has surpassed her original fundraising goal of $20,000; her current total stands at $23,726, enough to buy 177 bikes. So many lives will be changed!