Announcing a New FatCyclist / RKP Collaborative Project: The Paceline Podcast

02.5.2016 | 1:48 pm

You would think I’d learn. But I don’t learn. Or at least, I am not sure I learn the lessons I think I’m supposed to learn.

I have an example. 

I am currently about as busy as a human being can get. My day job has gotten me maxed out. Family stuff too. Training stuff too. And this blog. And the FattyCast. And I have a book I really need to get written.

So how about I take on another project?

Specifically, how about I partner up with the guys at Red Kite Prayer and do a weekly podcast about cycling with them, and call it The Paceline?

Like I said: not a good learner. But still: the fact is I really enjoy our chats, because I’m clearly by far the least-informed of the group. Plus since we have an actual radio guy hosting, we sound good at least a third of the time.

Give it a try. Subscribe on iTunesAndroid, or using the RSS feed ( Plus I’ve got a player down at the bottom of this post

And there are already three episodes ready to go.

Episode 1 (download MP3)
Disc Brakes, Peace Prize, Gravel Grinding, Podium Presentations

In this first episode, we try to have an argument about whether disc brakes are a good idea on road bikes. Unfortunately for the “argument” part, we all pretty much agree. That doesn’t prevent us from talking at great length about this, though.

Then we talk about whether the bike should receive the Nobel Peace Prize. I snort at the absurdity of this notion and then present a reasonable alternative. 

We talk about a couple of cool races coming up this year, and then end by talking about our pick for racer of the year. You’ll love my selection. Everyone agreed I was the winner. 

Episode 2 (download MP3)
Idaho Stop, Riding High, Winter Training, Debating Wheel Size 

In episode 2, we pretend to care about laws and whether we should feel bad about the fact that no cyclist has ever stopped for a stop sign in the history of stop signs. Except me of course, because I always abide the law.

We talk about riding while stoned, and I utterly fail to contribute anything meaningful because — and I am being absolutely honest here — I have never been high. Ever. Even once. I am a natural-born prude.

I do go on and on and on in the next segment, however, talking a lot about how much I’m digging my Kickr / TrainerRoad setup. Like, I think I go on for twenty minutes or so before I realize that I am a walking, talking TrainerRoad infomercial. 

Finally, I take a nap while the other two guys argue about which wheel size is best for mountain biking. 

Episode 3 (download MP3)

STC vs. IMBA, Sandbagging, New Bike Laws, Ride With Bono

This episode is kind of aggro, and I think that’s my fault. After all, the whole sandbagging part centers around something I wrote. I do, however, try to bring some levity to the show by speaking in a falsetto for the entirety of it. 

No, not really.

For realsies, I am proud of this show, and if you like podcasts and bikes, I have 92% confidence you will enjoy the Paceline.


Talking with The Cyclist Lawyer about Bikes, Racing, Life, and Bicycle Law

02.3.2016 | 8:46 am

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A “Vote for Colorado” Note from Fatty: It’s no secret that I’m a big fan of Camp Kesem. And I’m also a big fan of Colorado. And I would love to see a Camp Kesem at Colorado State. And you can help make that happen.

It’ll take just a minute.

You just need to go to the Camp Kesem Chapter Expansion campaign page and then scroll down to Colorado State, then vote for it. They’re in a serious underdog situation right now, so do me a favor. (Oh, and after you vote, if you post on Facebook or Twitter, you get a bonus vote, so do that too.)

Let’s get Camp Kesem over to Colorado State.

Talking with The Cyclist Lawyer about Bikes, Racing, Life, and Bicycle Law…on the FattyCast

Oh I know, let’s start start this post off with a lawyer joke: “How many lawyers does it take to do a podcast?”

Sadly, I have not yet come up with a clever punchline. I’m sure I will very soon, though.

Here’s the thing about my podcast with Megan Hottman, aka “The Cyclist Lawyer:” she’s an incredibly smart and nice person who loves biking about twenty times more than life itself and in fact pretty much shelved her law career to go be a pro cyclist.


She spends her time teaching cops how to respect people on bikes. She teaches bike safety to anyone who will listen. She teaches a spin class. She rides her bike to work every day, in spite of the fact that she lives way up in the mountains of Colorado, where the snow is currently eighty feet deep. She races more or less non-stop.

And she helps people who have bike-related problems, or bike-related businesses.

And in short, Megan Hottman is the lawyer all lawyers should want to grow up to be.


I’m going to call this episode of The FattyCast one of my favorites yet. It’s both fun and informative. And funny.

So do yourself a favor and listen to it on iTunes (please subscribe and review, for the love of all that’s good in the world), Stitcher, using my RSS feed (, or on Or, if you’re so inclined, just listen to it (or download it) below.

Asking for a Little Help

01.28.2016 | 11:41 am

I’ve talked a little about my son Brice before. Though not much, because he’s not that keen on me putting him up on a stage. Imagine that.

I could list the number of things that have been stacked against him, but I’d rather just say how incredibly proud I am of him for overcoming so many of these things (and how grateful I am for Lisa, who has been instrumental in helping him find a path).

He’s worked full-time for more than a year. He’s used his own money to go back to school, where he’s working toward being a pharmacy technician. He has aced nearly every assignment.

And he does all this without me hassling, prodding, or otherwise nagging him. In other words, he’s fully self-motivated.

He’s doing amazing. And now I’d like to ask a very particular subset of my readers to help him get started on the next part of his progress. 

Basically, if you have connections (or know someone who has connections) to a pharmacy in Utah County (from Provo to Alpine) or the South part of Salt Lake County (Draper, Sandy, etc.), I’d love it if you’d help Brice with get an inside track on a pharm tech externship, hopefully with a path toward a part- or full-time pharm tech position afterward.

Just email me ( with the subject line “pharm tech” and I’ll get you a copy of his resume, pronto. 

And if you include your name, address, and t-shirt size in the email, I’ll also send you a signed copy of both my books, as well as a Fat Cyclist t-shirt (assuming it’s a legitimate lead, not just a way to grab a couple books and a t-shirt). Regardless of whether it works out or not. 

Things are going great. Thanks much for helping them go even greater.

PS: I’m going to be out of town for a few days working on a very cool, very big, Secret Project, so will not be posting again ’til Tuesday. 





I Don’t Want to Brag, But…

01.27.2016 | 12:05 pm

I don’t want to brag, but my weight loss is going great this winter. In fact, I’ve already lost nine pounds. Which I suppose also means that I’ve gained way more than nine pounds. And also that nine pounds is pretty much the same three pounds I lose every week, then regain over the weekend. For the past three weeks in a row.

I don’t want to brag, but once I just totally walked by a bowl of M&Ms without taking a single one.

I don’t want to brag, but even at age 49.6, I can still fit into the same clothes I wore at age eighteen. Or I assume I could, if I had kept any of the clothes I wore when I was eighteen. Which I didn’t, so there’s no way you could prove this statement wrong.

I don’t want to brag, but it’s been at least ninety minutes since I’ve had a big spoonful of peanut butter.

I don’t want to brag, but even during this exceptionally cold and snowy Utah winter, I’m getting on my bike and riding every single day. OK, I’m not actually going outside to ride. I’m going into my basement and doing TrainerRoad while watching Netflix. But like I said, I’m not bragging.

I don’t want to brag, but about fifteen years ago, a bunch of my friends and I were riding our bikes around in a parking lot after a ride. There was a little curb divider in the lot, and on the other side of the curb, the lot was about eighteen inches lower. Or maybe twelve inches, it’s not important. What is important is that while my friends were watching, I rode up, jumped the curb, and landed it without even falling or squealing in terror. And you can never take that away from me.

I don’t want to brag, but I can look at a person and state, with startling accuracy, what air pressure they should be using in their tubeless mountain bike tires.

I don’t want to brag, but once not so long ago, I accidentally wrote a pun, then wrote “(no pun intended),” and then just went and took out the pun and the quasi-apology. Because puns should be eliminated whenever they’re identified, whether intentional or not.

I don’t want to brag, but I can shave my legs in under four minutes, and it’s been years since I’ve had a razor cut. In fact, I can now shave my legs faster than I can shave my head. To be fair, a big chunk of my head-shaving time is trying to figure out whether I have missed any spots on the back of my head.

I don’t want to brag, but last night I made chilli using turkey burger instead of regular hamburger, and it tasted nearly 40% as good. In fact, some members of my family said it tasted “not completely gross if you smother it with cheese and sour cream.”

And in short, my humility is breathtaking.

Austin McInerny of NICA on the FattyCast

01.25.2016 | 1:19 pm

Austin McInerny is the guy a lot of us wish we could be. He’s loved mountain biking more or less since there have been mountain bikes.

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He’s turned that love into NICA – National Interscholastic Cycling Association — a nonprofit geared toward getting high school kids on mountain bikes. We talk about riding, racing, advocacy, and the incredible consequences of wearing the wrong shoes at the wrong time on this episode of the FattyCast.

Find the FattyCast on iTunes, on Stitcher, my FattyCast RSS feed, or on Or you can listen to it / download it below:

Follow NICA on Twitter and Instagram, and be sure to check out their site at

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