Today, I shall begin by talking about something that has nothing to do with bikes, and then I will magically transition over to bikes. That is my game plan, such as it is.
I am currently a tangled snarl of stress, wrapped up in a burlap bag of stress, being pounded by Thor’s Hammer of Stress.
In fewer than ten days, I must turn in a report — a report that is the distillation of about three months of intense research and analysis.
It occurs to me: most of you would be surprised at what I do for a living. You’d be surprised at how intense of a job it is. You’d be surprised that I’m actually kind of respected for the quality of work I do. And more than anything else, you’d be freaked out at my methodology. Coworkers walk into my War Room — yes, I actually have my very own War Room — and are startled by the amount and quality of information confronting them. Some begin to experience vertigo and have to leave.
I’d post pictures, but then I’d start getting a bunch of unwanted job offers, and right now I just don’t have the time to fend off the hordes of headhunters.
Anyway, as I was saying: I’m down to ten days ’til that report’s due, and I’ve got tons left to do on it.
Except that ten days is really more like six days, because before I knew my due date would be October 15, I set up a nice little four-day family vacation, going from October 10-14.
Excuse me. I need to throw up.
Since I am so busy, I have hardly had any time for riding. I’m quickly falling out of shape, but I can live with that, because I know that staying in shape right now would be a futile effort. After all, once I have the shoulder surgery I’m going to be off the bike for a bit anyway. Not much point in trying to stay fast right now, is there?
So: now, when I am so busy I am staying up late each night, when I am so busy I don’t have time to ride, when I am so busy I am fully losing my mind, is a manifestly bad time for me to find a time-sucking work of genius: Bike Snob NYC.
And yet, I can’t stop reading this guy. He’s incredible.
I’ve been reading newest-to-oldest, so I may not have the context right, but Bike Snob NYC (BSNYC, as he calls himself) loves his fixed gear bikes, and has a healthy disdain for the fixie foppery fad that’s sprung up around him.
Here’s how far apart he and I are: I didn’t even realize there is a fixie fad. I just have one — my stock Pista — because back when I lived in Washington, I thought it would be fun to race track.
He laments top tube pads on fixies. I have never even seen a fixie top tube pad.
He has an encyclopedic knowledge of the urban fixed gear cycling scene and its foibles. I just think about whether I could possibly climb a big mountain on my fixie without my knees shattering.
He has a treatise on how and when cyclists should greet each other that frankly has me thinking of plagiarizing and submitting it to BikeRadar, so I can take the week off.
I’m gushing, I know. But Bike Snob NYC is that funny.
I admire him, and I fear him.
PS: I now fully expect at least fifteen comments telling me that I am the last person in the world to discover this blog, and that the rest of you have been reading him for months. In which case, thanks for telling me.