Let’s Help A Cancer Doctor Fight Cancer In A Very Unusual Way

05.1.2009 | 8:47 am

UPDATE: The voting has evidently ended, so I’m de-linking this post. However, on Monday you’ll definitely want to check the Kona site to see the final verdict.

A Note from Fatty: In a very longwinded way, today I’m going to ask you to go to this contest page on the Kona site and vote for Cadabra as the name for their new bike. There’s a great story behind why, but if you’re in a hurry, just trust me and go to the Kona site, scroll to the bottom of the page, and vote for Cadabra. Thanks.

A Big Thanks from Fatty: The 100 Miles of Nowhere registration is now over. And now that it is, I’d like to admit something: When I started it, I did not think anyone would sign up. I mean, seriously: Ask people to pay $75 for the privilege of riding either their trainer or a very short course for a hundred miles? Why would anyone do that?

Well, the answer, of course, is that you would do it to help fight cancer. And because evidently you have the same twisted sense of humor that I have.

And, of course, you want the very cool stuff that the very cool sponsors are providing. So, I want to again thank Twin Six, DZ-Nuts, Banjo Brothers, Garmin-Slipstream, CarboRocket, ProBar and Clif for making an irresistable schwag bag.

Now, guess how many people signed up? C’mon, guess.

OK I’ll tell you: 421. Yes, that’s right. More than 400 of my readers have completely lost their minds. Please seek help immediately. It’s not too late. Well, maybe it is, actually.

And you know what, my crazy friends? You have used your insanity to raise more than $20,000 to fight cancer. Which doesn’t suck at all.

Let’s Help A Cancer Doctor Fight Cancer In A Very Unusual Way

Heather Gilbert is a doctor at the Huntsman Cancer Institute, specializing in the hematologic malignancies with an emphasis on lymphoma. She helped Susan when Susan was there for her hip replacement.

And Heather is also a self-admitted hardcore bikeaholic. Which I mean in the very nicest possible way.

In other words, Heather is the very best kind of person there is: A cyclist who has chosen to spend her life fighting cancer.

And she needs our help so she can do even more.

200905010839.jpgHelp Heather Name a Kona, Then Win That Kona

See, besides being a hardcore bikeaholic and cancer doctor, Heather is also very creative. She recently entered a contest to name a new bike Kona is coming out with. Her idea? Call it The Cadabra.

That’s a very cool name for a very cool bike.

And it’s also one of the finalist names in Kona’s “Name Our New Bike” contest.

So Heather has said that if she wins the contest — meaning she gets the bike she named — she will give it to me to raffle off to help Team Fatty raise money to fight cancer.

Let me recap: Heather — who fights cancer for a living — has a great chance to win a cool bike, thanks to her good idea. But instead, providing she wins, she’s going to give it to me to raffle off so one of you gets it, so we can raise more money to fight cancer.

Right this second I’m trying to think of something cooler than that, and I just can’t. There’s nothing cooler.

So let’s help her do that. Right now, go to Kona’s voting page, scroll to the bottom of the page, and vote for the Cadabra. It’ll take less than ten seconds.

At this moment, the two finalist names are tied right at 50%, so your vote is crucial. So go. Now. Shoo.

PS: Team Fatty Co-captain MikeRoadie has asked me to pass on the info for a fundraiser he’s doing:

From May 1st through June 30th, Hall Wines Napa will donate 25% of sale. Just enter code “livestrong” at checkout!

This is an opportunity for people to purchase some fantastic wines that are usually only available to the Hall Napa Wine Club members! Their incredible Cabernet Sauvignon is only $40!


  1. Comment by bradk | 05.1.2009 | 8:52 am

    Too cool of Heather, She rocks! Vote is in.

  2. Comment by eclecticdeb | 05.1.2009 | 8:54 am

    One more for “Cadabra”. Cool name, even cooler doctor. Coolest Fatty.

  3. Comment by philosoraptor | 05.1.2009 | 9:05 am

    It’s an shortening of “abracadabra”, right?

    On the other hand — and this is a big other hand — I wish that it didn’t sound so much like “cadaver”.

  4. Comment by Uphill Battle | 05.1.2009 | 9:09 am

    Hey, let’s go Team Fatty! The votes are now 52% Cadabra 48% the other name. Lets build that lead!

  5. Comment by Clydesdale | 05.1.2009 | 9:14 am

    Cadabra 52% takahwatchamacallit 48%

    Cool story from up here. Riding along the other day to do a loop of our famous parkway, presently closed to cars, until all the snow is gone, and is amazing, when a guy rides up behind and says “hey, Fat Cyclist water bottle, cool!” Turns out he had one also and some sweet Twin six Alpe de’Huez jersey and socks. Rode with him a bit. Pretty small world you have hold of Fatty!!

    Win Susan!
    Win Leona!
    40 down… 10 (the hardest 10) to go!!

  6. Comment by Rick S. | 05.1.2009 | 9:15 am

    Just voted.

  7. Comment by Hoggy | 05.1.2009 | 9:17 am

    Cadabra was the best name anyway and i would have voted for it even if it wasnt going to be a cancer fund raiser.

    ps fatty friends of mine raised their own $22 000 dollars today that is going to the starlight foundation (a chairty granting wishes to kids with cancer) Their strategy, hang out in a busy city train station at peak hours dressed in all sorts of costumes bugging commuters for cash.

    That is incredible. I love how creative people are in finding ways to do something good for others. – FC

  8. Comment by pipebaum | 05.1.2009 | 9:21 am

    53% to 47% The Cadabara is winning. Keep voting.

  9. Comment by Freddy Freshlegs | 05.1.2009 | 9:24 am

    “Kona, Kona, Kona, Kona, Kona Cadaa-aa-bra! You come and go! You come and go-oo-ooo-oooo!”

    (My apologies to Culture Club and anyone within earshot today.)

  10. Comment by Fatbikeracer | 05.1.2009 | 9:38 am

    Oh, that other name is good, but I voted like yinz told me.

  11. Comment by KanyonKris | 05.1.2009 | 9:44 am

    Cadabra pulls out to a 55% lead! Witness the power of the Fat side!

    Freddy – I like your jingle. Boy George is so under appreciated today.

    KK, you and I generally line right up, musicwise, but I’m afraid I just can’t side with you on this. In fact, I would like to posit that it is not mathematically possible to underappreciate Boy George. – FC

  12. Comment by Philly Jen | 05.1.2009 | 9:47 am

    As a two-time Kona owner, I’m totally into this contest.

    Both my Konas have syllable repeats in their names (Hahana, Nunu), so at first I read this as “Cacadabra.” Which make me think of capybaras, chupacabras, and poo-flinging monkeys — all of which are delightful!

    @ Freddy: At least you didn’t invoke the Steve Miller Band…

  13. Comment by graisseux | 05.1.2009 | 9:49 am

    “Kona, Kona, Cadabra…I wanna reach out and grab ya”

  14. Comment by Jamieson | 05.1.2009 | 9:52 am

    Voted twice. Have to find more computers.

    My Konas have alliteration. Dawg and Dew.

  15. Comment by bz | 05.1.2009 | 9:53 am

    Cadabra has jumped to a 56 / 44 lead. Will this break hold? Cadabra is digging deep into its suitcase of courage…

  16. Comment by Aaron | 05.1.2009 | 9:58 am

    Cadabra is pulling away!

  17. Comment by Rantwick | 05.1.2009 | 10:03 am

    Done and Done. Nice idea, that one.

  18. Comment by KanyonKris | 05.1.2009 | 10:08 am

    FC – Good retort, made me laugh. I admit I do have some Culture Club and get a little blast from the past when it shuffles in, but small doses only – anything more is toxic. And I’ve been listening to Jonathan Coulton, it’s been fun, I think I’ll do a post on it soon.

    graisseux – bingo!

    bz – love the Liggit-ism.

  19. Comment by GenghisKhan | 05.1.2009 | 10:10 am

    Voted. Cadabra at 57%!

  20. Comment by RB | 05.1.2009 | 10:22 am

    up to 58%

  21. Comment by Jo | 05.1.2009 | 10:22 am

    Voted: my pleasure.

  22. Comment by TomE | 05.1.2009 | 10:29 am

    58% – 42%….they should just call it now!!!!

  23. Comment by Jonnie J | 05.1.2009 | 10:30 am

    Vote is in. Looks like Cadabra is running away with it.

  24. Comment by the Road Doc | 05.1.2009 | 10:33 am

    Just voted. Cadabra holding steady at 57%…

    Okay, I noticed that they had short descriptions on what each name was about. The Cadabra, as expected, is an abbreviated version of abracadabra. The Tanuki, is just, well, bizarre.

    “Literally, the Tanuki is a Japanese raccoon like dog or badger with monster nuts. Enough said. Japanese folklore, however, backs up this name suggestion by explaining how the legendary tanuki is reputed to be mischievous and jolly, a master of disguise and shape shifting. Basically, our new bike in a nut shell (pardon the pun). Fun, adaptability and super oversized cojones.”

    I thought this was all meant metaphorically. Oh NO, it is absolutely literal (maybe I should have picked up on that when they said “Literally”), and those Japanese sure do love to make statues of the critters.



    Also note that they “pardon[ed] the pun”

  25. Comment by Tim | 05.1.2009 | 10:34 am

    Voted. It is starting to look like a landslide victory for Cadabra!

  26. Comment by Big Boned | 05.1.2009 | 10:36 am

    Cadabra holding at 58%. Come on FOF (Friends of Fatty) it really did take LESS than 10 seconds – even if you are on dial-up it should take no more than that.
    You know how breaks go – the peloton always tries to reel you back in. This thing ain’t over.

  27. Comment by Scott | 05.1.2009 | 10:50 am

    Up to 59% baby! Cancer took my mom in 2003 at age 47. It feels good to fight back – thanks Fatty!

  28. Comment by Di | 05.1.2009 | 10:59 am

    59% Cadabra, 41% Tanuki

    I have to say that I am very impressed with the direction this blog has taken. The fundraising success and involvement is monstrous! Just incredible.

  29. Comment by anne | 05.1.2009 | 11:00 am

    59% to 41%! i’ll vote again at work when i get there.

    No, don’t do that. Let’s play fair. – FC

  30. Comment by LidsB2 | 05.1.2009 | 11:04 am

    Voted. Giddyup. Graisseux — many thanks for replacing in my melon Freddy’s musical abomination with something infinitely more tolerable!

  31. Comment by mikeb | 05.1.2009 | 11:12 am

    Done. Cadabra 60%

  32. Comment by Mike | 05.1.2009 | 11:12 am

    Tanuki. Seriously, how is this name even in the finals?

    Say it: Kona Tanuki, Tuh-new-key. Yuck.

    Kona Cadabra. Much better. The new Kona Cadabra. I like the sound much better.

    Man, to think that poor bike almost got stuck being called a Tanuki.

  33. Comment by Linda | 05.1.2009 | 11:13 am

    …and we’re at 60%!

  34. Comment by MOCougFan | 05.1.2009 | 11:36 am

    Voted. Cadabra’s pulling away. Heather gave me a nice smile at RAWROD. She looks like a nice cancer doc. Got to vote for her.

  35. Comment by gargoyle030 | 05.1.2009 | 11:38 am

    Done. And I just told my racing team to help out.



  36. Comment by Brian | 05.1.2009 | 11:50 am

    Now up to 61%.

    Can we go vote again from a different computer?

  37. Comment by 29er | 05.1.2009 | 11:59 am

    Thanks for supporting Heather- She is the most enthusiastic biker I know and it is great that so many people are helping her out!

    Win Susan! Win Heather!

  38. Comment by Weiland | 05.1.2009 | 12:28 pm

    Fatty says to ride 100 miles to nowhere, I ride 100 miles around the block. Fatty says to vote Cadbra, I vote Cadabra. I have 2 Fatty jerseys which he told me to buy, socks, shirts and a bottle which he just up and gave me. Was there something in the koolaid? Is this some kind of a Jedi mind trick?

  39. Comment by Clay | 05.1.2009 | 12:33 pm

    Voted. Very quick, very easy.

    It’s not even fair anymore…62 Cadabra, 38 Tanuki.

  40. Comment by SurlyCommuter | 05.1.2009 | 12:51 pm

    I think Cadabra just gave Tanuki “the look” and took off!

  41. Comment by ScottP | 05.1.2009 | 12:56 pm

    Voted. I do like Cadabra better than Tanuki for the name as well. And now it’s running away at 63%.

    How does it feel to weld such power on the internets?

  42. Comment by Clydesteve | 05.1.2009 | 1:10 pm

    Weiland – Fatty will bring the Koolaid to the Livestrong Challenges – Make sure and sign up to the team of your choice – Seattle – so you do not miss out!

  43. Comment by GenghisKhan | 05.1.2009 | 1:10 pm

    63-37 for Cadabra–looks like FoF is layin’ down the Fatty Smack™!

  44. Comment by Weiland | 05.1.2009 | 1:15 pm

    Clydesteve – Dang there’s another one, he said to sign up for the Livestrong Challenge and I did. I’m a go for Austin.

  45. Comment by WheelDancer | 05.1.2009 | 1:18 pm

    I voted and it really does look like Cadabra is on the descent while Tanuki is laboring up the climb, thanks Fatty for wielding your power for good. I can’t imagine what kind of havoc you could wreak if you went to the dark side.

    So I’m wondering how “self-admitted hardcore bikeaholic” could be used in anything but the nicest way? But then having more bikes than fingers might make me a little biased…

  46. Comment by Bob | 05.1.2009 | 1:38 pm


    Cadabra with a commanding lead at 63%

  47. Comment by gregc | 05.1.2009 | 1:50 pm

    63 to 37- dont just beat someone if you can crush them!!

  48. Comment by Hoss rider | 05.1.2009 | 2:13 pm

    Cadabra is the gayest name for a bike i’ve heard in a while

  49. Comment by Uni Tom | 05.1.2009 | 2:30 pm

    64% to 36%.
    Hoss, I’m not sure that word means what you think it means.

  50. Comment by Cyclin' Missy | 05.1.2009 | 2:32 pm

    How can I not do something so little as vote for a bike name online to fight cancer?! One more for Cadabra! 64% when I voted.

  51. Comment by Angie G | 05.1.2009 | 2:32 pm

    It’s not name of the bike it’s what the name represents. Having watched my sister in law fight Hodgkins twice and emerge victorious after a bone marrow transplant, magic is exactly what it seems people like Heather wield.

    Cadabera is a perfect choice and has my vote. Up to 64% now.

    Go Heather!!

  52. Comment by sdcadbiker | 05.1.2009 | 2:37 pm

    Talking of “wielding power on the internets” have any of you purchased Clif Shot Bloks recently? Long term readers will remember that Elden criticised the packaging of his otherwise beloved trail food and… cadabra! Clif just changed the packet to his new spec.

    Elden, I hope that you got at least one free box of Cran Raz for this… :-)

    Win Susan!

  53. Comment by Mike Roadie | 05.1.2009 | 2:43 pm

    Kona Cadabra…………I wanna reach out and grab ya’


    BTW All, Hall Wines make a great Mother’s Day gift!!!

  54. Comment by Kathleen@ForgingAhead | 05.1.2009 | 3:38 pm

    Done! She’s at 64%!

  55. Comment by (California ) Matt | 05.1.2009 | 4:29 pm

    Ya got my vote too…great work Fatty (and Heather)! And to all of you who entered the ride to nowhere, that is just plain awesome! You’re a powerful man Fatty…you have the power to MAKE A DIFFERENCE! Look at your LiveStrong campaign….coming up on 200 THOUSAND $$!! That is just overwhelming! COME ON SAN JOSE area people…we NEED MORE MEMBERS!!!

    WIN SUSAN!!!!

  56. Comment by BikeCopVT | 05.1.2009 | 5:01 pm

    Just voted. The people at Kona must know something is up, Cadabra is now at 65%. Fatty are you doing the Dr. Evil pose? You’ve got super powers!

    Win Susan!

  57. Comment by Kt | 05.1.2009 | 5:03 pm

    And… done.

    Cadabra pulling ahead, 65-35! Come on, Fatty’s Army! Let’s do this thing! :)

  58. Comment by Kt | 05.1.2009 | 5:04 pm

    Oh yeah, PS: missed the break for the 100 miles to Nowhere ride. I’m going to take whoever-it-was’s cue and also donate an extra $75 to my Livestrong page. :)

  59. Comment by kentucky joe | 05.1.2009 | 6:12 pm

    vote cast, check
    100 miles to nowhere, check
    Fatty Jersey, check

    All for such a great cause, thanks for making it a very easy choice on where to keep making my charitable contributions!

  60. Comment by Marla | 05.1.2009 | 6:43 pm

    Got my vote in!

  61. Comment by Yukirin Boy | 05.1.2009 | 6:56 pm

    vote in!

  62. Comment by Anonymous | 05.1.2009 | 7:06 pm

    Tanuki is a better name but I voted for Cadabra for you. Peace.

  63. Comment by Phil | 05.1.2009 | 7:24 pm

    Tanuki has strong geek appeal, but Cadabra it is!

  64. Comment by Heather G | 05.1.2009 | 8:13 pm

    As the self-admitted-hardcore-bikeaholic-meant-only-in-the-nicest-way cancer doctor in question, I am amazed to watch the responses to this post unfold. I knew that Fatty’s website was popular – but 1200 votes in a single day? Wow!

    Fatty is doing an amazing thing here with his advocacy for cancer support – and not just in terms of his fundraising, though that is pretty amazing all by itself. Even more than the money, though, Fatty’s blog informs the world that cancer is not the defining aspect of his or his family’s life. And it offers a tangible hope that even in the midst of grief and difficulty and loss, you can still choose to find joy, create laughter, and be fully alive.

    I am honored to be able to contribute, even in a small way, to such a worthy endeavor.

    Thank you, everyone, for your support.

    And, of course, WIN SUSAN!

  65. Comment by anonymous | 05.2.2009 | 5:48 am

    I voted! :)

    And if you get to raffle it, and I win, I would have to give it back to her as much as I would LOVE the bike—-she is doing great work daily and willing to give such a sacrifice to let you raffle it off—would she take the bike if I gave it back when I win?!?

  66. Comment by Julie | 05.2.2009 | 8:35 am

    Cadabra 57-43 this a.m.

  67. Comment by MTB W | 05.2.2009 | 9:58 am

    Just voted – it looks like Tanuki is making a comeback from a 65-35 deficit to 57-43. Keep up the voting!

  68. Comment by Bluenoser | 05.2.2009 | 12:17 pm

    It’s in there fatty.


  69. Comment by Kevin | 05.2.2009 | 12:58 pm

    Done, voted. You’re the best!

  70. Comment by John H. | 05.4.2009 | 4:36 pm

    So, it’s Monday, where are the results?

  71. Comment by Nancy | 05.4.2009 | 8:33 pm

    I don’t see any results yet, but I think you should tell Kona what Doctor Heather did to help fight cancer. Maybe they’ll give you another bike to raffle off, or some other cool thing, like match the dollars raised or something. You all rock. Give Susan a hug, Eldon.

  72. Comment by Dan O | 05.5.2009 | 8:29 am

    Cadabra WON!

    Win Susan

    life is good

  73. Pingback by Fat Cyclist » Blog Archive » Fight Cancer, Win a Kona Cadabra | 05.18.2009 | 12:50 pm

    [...] couple weeks ago, Fat Cyclist readers pitched in to vote for “Cadabra” as the name of Kona’s big-hit, high-end freeride [...]


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