A Note About Ordering Fat Cyclist Gear: Twin Six has been working their butts off to get all the 2010 Fat Cyclist pre-orders out the door. If you haven’t gotten your pre-order yet, you will sometime this week.
So if you didn’t pre-order, your chance to order is coming this Friday, 8:00am CST. The remaining stock of 2010 jerseys and shorts will all be for sale, along with the newly-designed 2010 Fat Cyclist T-Shirts, which will feature the cool design you see to the right.
You should know that there are not a lot of extra jerseys; if you delay, you’ll likely miss out.
You’ll find all the Fat Cyclist Gear over at Twin Six starting this Friday, at 8:00am CST.
Buy A Garmin-Slipstream Bottle, Fight Cancer
Early this year, I poked fun at Team Slipstream-Garmin here. They responded by…becoming an incredibly generous partner with Team Fatty in our fight against cancer, sponsoring the 100 Miles of Nowhere race.
And now they want to do more in that fight.
From now until December 15 — plenty of time for Christmas delivery, in other words — Garmin-Slipstream is going to donate 50% of the gross of their sales from their Podium Bottles to the Huntsman Cancer Institute.
Yes, that’s right. 50%. Basically, all the profit.
Why the Huntsman Cancer Institute? Because I asked them too, for one reason. And why did I choose the Huntsman Cancer Institute? Well, those of you who have been with my blog for a while know that they took incredible care of Susan when she needed to have her hip replaced.
And they don’t just take care of people with cancer. The Huntsman Cancer Institute does a lot of vital research for cancer treatment.
So, here’s the deal: Click here to go buy Garmin-Slipstream bottles — they’re the Camelbak Podium bottles I prefer over any other kind of bottle. Buy some for yourself, and maybe buy some for your riding friends — a fourpack of bottles makes a really great gift for a cyclist. Plus, when you buy four or more, they’re $8.00 each instead of $11.00 each.
Regardless of how many you buy, Garmin-Slipstream will donate half your purchase to the Huntsman Cancer Institute. That kicks butt.
And while you’re at it, check out the other Garmin-Slipstream holiday special offers. There’s some good stuff there.
There are surprisingly few absolute truths in the universe, and fewer still absolute truths in the world of cycling. This fact, which I just discovered upon making it up, startled me because it implies that cycling is a subset of the universe, as opposed to the entirety of said universe. Which I find disconcerting and unpleasant.
I’m rambling. It happens.
The point to which I am leading is that with the paucity of touchstone truths in the universe, one should make a note of whatever important truths one discovers.
And, to my delight, I have discovered three such truths in recent days.
I will now educate you.
1. If You Don’t Use It, You Will In Fact Lose It. I feel a little bit bad about leading off with this truth, because it’s something you may have heard before, except for the “You Will In Fact” part, which makes it original and copyrightable.
I’m pretty sure that this cliche (because until I added the “You Will In Fact” part, it was nothing but a cliche) originally meant that if you don’t use an acquired skill or capability, your proficiency at said skill will degrade over time, until you reach a threshold of no longer having that capability at all.
Which is probably true, but not very interesting.
I now assert, however, that this axiom (yes, I’ve promoted it from cliche to axiom, concurrent with my copyrighting aforementioned axiom) applies to stuff. Specifically, if you don’t use something, you’ll forget where it is.
This happens to me twice each year, as I go from wearing summer cycling clothes to winter cycling clothes. I simply cannot find the winter gloves I bought for riding last year. Nor the insulated tights. Nor the high-tech beanie that fits snugly between my helmet and head.
I haven’t used it. Ergo, I’ve lost it.
As I get older (which seems to be happening more or less all the time), I’ve noticed an acceleration of this axiom, which makes me think there’s a corollary in order:
Corollary: as time passes, you will lose more stuff more quickly.
To illustrate, I have two pair of Oakley biking glasses I really love: My Flak Jackets, and my Jawbones. The Flak Jackets are terrific, but I prefer the Jawbones. So I use the Jawbones more often.
After using the Jawbones exclusively for about a week, I wanted to use the Flak Jackets, just to mix things up a bit.
But I cannot find them anywhere. (I’m not dead certain why I typed “anywhere in that last sentence.” It seems that if I can’t find them, the “anywhere” part is unnecessary. I.e., if I can’t find them in most places but can find them in one or more other place(s), then the whole “I can’t find them” statement falls more or less apart. I need to be more careful with my language, I think.)
And in short, I have not used them, and therefore have in fact lost them. QED.
2. If You Can’t Talk, You’d Better Be Racing, Cuz You’re Not Having Fun. Brad and I were riding a couple weeks ago, going up Clark’s, in Corner Canyon. The whole way up, we were riding a good, hard pace — but we were talking, too. At one point, Brad asked how I was doing. “I’m having fun,” I replied. “I can still talk, but just barely.”
At which point, Brad uttered this axiom: “If you can’t talk, you’d better be racing, cuz you’re not having fun.”
The enormity of this truth stunned both of us. Seriously, the ability to converse on the bike seems to be the dividing line between riding for fun and riding to prove something.
Try it for yourself: Go on a ride with someone. At first, ride at such a pace that you can talk. Consider whether you are having fun.
Then, ride hard enough that you can no longer talk.
After a couple minutes of this, ask yourself the following question: “Am I having fun?” Compare the amount of fun you are (not) having with the fun you were almost certainly having when you could talk.
I submit it will be less.
3. If Your Recipe Contains Eggs, Cheese, and Bacon, It Cannot Fail. Yesterday, I made quiche. Now, people over 35 always make a crack about “Real Men Don’t Eat Quiche,” but those people are usually dumb, and also have not tried my quiche.
Here’s how my quiche is made: get a pie crust, add a lot of cheese, a lot of bacon, and a lot of tomato, avocado, onion, peppers, and mushrooms. Push it all down to make it fit in the crust. Make an egg concoction out of eggs and half-and-half. Pour over the cheese / bacon / vegetable pile.
As I enjoyed this quiche, it occurred to me that I could have made an equally delicious batch of scrambled eggs with the same ingredients. Or an exquisite omelette. Or a casserole.
The fact is, the only difference between all these things is what shape they take as they’re cooked. The truly important thing is that they all have eggs, cheese, and bacon, the perfect triumvirate of comfort food. As long as you use a lot of all three, it’s going to come out delicious.
Corollary: sour cream should go on top.
PS: If, when making quiche, you let some of the egg goop bubble up and over the pan onto the bottom of the oven, for the love of all that’s good in the world, please remember to scrape that stuff off the bottom of the oven before using again, or you will find out whether your smoke alarm works. If you don’t die of asphyxiation, I mean.
PPS: Anyone have a good idea for how to make everything I own stop smelling like smoke?