FatCyclist.com 2014 Gear Pre-Order Starts NOW!

07.8.2013 | 9:01 am

A Note from Fatty for People Who Just Want the Link: If you’re in no mood to read and read and read just to find the links to the 2014 FatCyclist.com gear, you’ll find all of it on my very own page at Twin Six

And here’s a quick bullet list of links for what’s available, for you impatient types:

Remember, the pre-order ends on July 16. Everything will ship in September.

Usually, I start with a lot of jibber-jabber. And no small amount of hyperbole.

I try to build some excitement, try to tease you a little, try to build a little buzz. I figure that if I get you worked up a little bit, you’ll be as enthused about the FatCyclist.com jerseys, shorts and other gear as I am.

But for the 2014 FatCyclist.com gear, what I really want to do is just show you. Because I simply cannot imagine that you won’t think this is a monumentally cool-looking jersey.

So. Check it out (women’s version too!):

Men's Front

When you first look at it, you can’t help but love the subtlety of it. The understated elegance. And then you look a little closer:


Yep, an infinite field of pie, bratwurst, and the FatCyclist.com logo. The very concept of it is just so…so…perfect

And here’s the equally perfect back of the jersey:


A few details: 

  • This is available in both men’s and women’s sizing. For what it’s worth (not much!) I wear a size Medium when I weigh less than 165; I wear a Large when I weigh 165 – 180; I wear an XL when I weigh 180+. 
  • The zipper is full-length. And it’s hidden, so as to not disrupt the beautiful pattern.
  • There are 3 pockets. Each of them is deep and large enough to hold a couple bratwurst. Or a slice of pie. Although I’d think carefully about packing pie on a ride. 
  • “Fight Like Susan” is on the inside collar, as it is every year.
  • Made in the USA. In fact, all the FatCyclist.com clothing items are made in the USA. 
Long-Sleeve Jersey (Men’s and Women’s)

It may be difficult to imagine right now — with temperatures in the low ten-thousands — but someday it’s going to be Autumn again. Indeed, one might say that Winter is coming. 

So maybe you should have something nice and cozy for those cold days on the bike. May I recommend the thermally-soft-and-warm FatCyclist.com long sleeve jersey?


It has the same design as the short-sleeve jersey, with the same pockets and fit, but the inside is nice and fleecy and warm. This is the jersey you’ll wear more often than any other from October through March.  

That’s half the year. Almost. And it feels like 2/3 of the year

It seems to me that you deserve a nice jersey for the cold half (almost) of the year, too. 

Bib Shorts (Men’s and Women’s)

I wear Twin Six bib shorts on pretty much every ride — both road and mountain biking. That includes hundred-mile mountain bike races or training rides with 13,000 feet of climbing. And I never need any kind of chamois cream. Is this because I am an uncharacteristically hardy man, able to withstand extraordinary pain? 


It’s because these are really good bib shorts, at a price way below the price of most really good bib shorts. And here’s what the FatCyclist bib shorts are going to look like this year:


It’s a little tricky to crack the code on this illustration, so I’ll help you out. The Pie / Bratwurst / Horse pattern is on the suspenders, for you and you alone to admire as you check out your fabulous physique in the mirror prior to donning your jersey. 

The “WIN” logo goes right above your butt. People behind you will think it’s a challenge. You, of course, know better.

Wind Jacket

The wind. It scares me. It slows you down and — on a cool day — freezes you. And while this wind jacket won’t do anything about the “slowing you down” part, it can help you not be anywhere near as miserable. 

Note that the wind jacket — unlike jerseys — does not have back pockets.

I’ve also used this jacket for the rain. And while it’s by no means waterproof, it does a pretty darned good job of keeping out everything but a full-on downpour. 

And when you don’t need to wear it, it rolls up nice an small, fitting into one of your jersey pockets.

Ta da.

Wind Vest

It’s like a wind jacket! But without arms! Because sometimes, you just need a little something to protect your core. 


The FatCyclist.com wind vest is exactly that something. 


I am a simple man, with simple needs. And one of those needs is to not have to have one kind of sock for riding my bike and another kind of sock for those unfortunate moments during which I am not riding my bike. 

Which brings us to the new FatCyclist.com sock:


This is a sock that looks exactly right when you’re on the bike, but stealthy enough that you can wear as business socks, or wherever. Including with sandals. In fact, especially with sandals. A 5″ cuff looks awesome with sandals, and don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise.

Cycling Cap

You can’t be dressed head-to-toe in FatCyclist.com gear unless you’ve actually got something on your head. This tech cycling cap — which means it wicks really nicely and is fantastic for wearing both off and on the bike — should do the trick nicely.


And a little tip for the guys: these caps cover baldness really really well. Not that I would know anything about baldness.


Hydroflo Bottle With Watergate Cap

I am pretty much completely obsessed with water bottles. I like the bottles to be reasonably big. I like them to stay put in their cage. I like them to be easy to squeeze. i like them to not retain the taste of the last thing that was in them. I like liquid to come out when it should, and to stay in when it should.

These are all reasonable wants. But there is only one bottle that actually does this. And that is the Specialized Hydroflo bottle with the Watergate cap. It is, without question or exception, the best bottle there is. 

Here’s how much I like them: I bought twenty for myself last year. It’s one of the best bike-related purchases I’ve ever made, too, because now I no longer have to use bottles that are hard to squeeze with valves that have ridiculous locking mechanisms or lids that dribble liquid out. 

I’m not saying you should buy twenty of these. But you know, maybe you should buy a couple. You’ll see.

Pre-Order Week Starts Today!

Every year, I put my FatCyclist.com gear up for pre-order, for just a few days. This year, the pre-order goes July 8-16. So be sure to not wait to place your order. 

If you’ve got any questions, ask them in the comments box; I’ll do my best to answer them ASAP.


PS: A huge thanks goes out to Twin Six for — once again — outdoing themselves with a fantastic design.

PPS: Congrats to Nancy S, who won the complete FatCyclist.com kit by randomly being selected from the folks who bought a Twin Six T-Shirt of the month subscription. Email me, Nancy!


  1. Comment by NYCCarlos | 07.8.2013 | 9:33 am

    wowzers! after a nearly 3 month absence from reading the blog (it’s not you, it’s me!), I’m happy I’m back today! This kit is definitely getting purchased in its entirety. Definitely their best work yet.

    Fatty and Fatties… I missed you guys!

  2. Comment by Micha O | 07.8.2013 | 10:13 am

    I think that I saw a spectator at Stage 9 of the TDF wearing Fatty Cyclist jersey. Seriously!

  3. Comment by Ian | 07.8.2013 | 10:40 am

    After the little tease a couple days ago, I was properly excited for some new gear.

    But… after taking a look at stuff this morning, I’m just not really enthused about it. :( Dunno why, but I’m thinking that while the pattern is cool (really cool, btw), overall its just too much black.

    Maybe perusing it again through the week will change my mind.

  4. Comment by eclecticdeb | 07.8.2013 | 10:57 am

    Love the kit design (bratwurst??? PIE???? !!! ), not wowed by the color (especially for women’s). Would have been awesome if the clydesdale and “fatcyclist.com” was pink. I have one of the first jersey’s — and I love it.

  5. Comment by Sam Dalton | 07.8.2013 | 11:26 am

    Ordered a jersey and some socks for delivery all the way to the UK. Will be repping Fatty with pride :)

  6. Comment by Jenni | 07.8.2013 | 11:28 am

    I think it’s gorgeous. Way to go TwinSix! The little orange horse is my favorite part…awesome!

  7. Comment by Andrew | 07.8.2013 | 11:31 am

    Wow. I love the mini bratwurst and pie in the design.

  8. Comment by Davidh-Marin,ca | 07.8.2013 | 11:43 am

    @NYCCarlos. Congratulations and welcome back. Did you win your appeal or was it good behavior that got you back so soon? Either way, happy return. We expect to see you next year in Davis in your new kit, if you are allowed to travel out of state by then. Oh! That’s not where you’ve been? My bad, sorry.

    Fatty. Great kit, though I suspect the all black kit is a ’set up’ for Rockwell 2014. You’ll power along as usual (being an award winning comedic mastermind) being motor-paced by an oversized dump truck filled with ice, while us coastal types cook in the sun like a brat on the grill in our stylish new kits. But style is everything after all.

    Thank you also for the simplicity of the bibs and socks. I can now match older FC jerseys to the new bibs, and I can replenish my sock supply that has been decimated by constant use, and our puppy. (Trust me you don’t want to wear your socks again after they’ve been through a puppy)

    Lastly, kids wear: please query your 11 y.o.’s. girls. I am thinking about getting a kit for my 12 y.o. Daughter (who is quite tall), but am not sure if she would wear something that said Fat Cyclist What’s their opinion?

    Great job Twin Six and Fatty.

  9. Comment by Bryan (not that one) | 07.8.2013 | 11:51 am

    Love the design.

  10. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.8.2013 | 12:35 pm

    So, How many orders would we need to be able to add youth sized kits to the mix?

    Also, I was perplexed that Twin Six marketed the design as “hot dogs and pies”. Hot dogs? Surely they are brats, right? You have brat sponsors to keep happy dammnit :-)

  11. Comment by Clydesteve | 07.8.2013 | 12:45 pm

    This is a sock that looks exactly right when you’re on the bike, but stealthy enough that you can wear as business socks, or wherever. Including with sandals. In fact, especially with sandals. A 5? cuff looks awesome with sandals, and don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise…

    Bwaa Ha Ha Ha! I was in Italy most of last month on business. I saw an ~272 lb. American tourist in Rome rocking 8″ black business socks, black penny loafers, ultra-bright-red knee length shorts, and a Hawaiian shirt.

    It was a good look – for him.

  12. Comment by Jeremy | 07.8.2013 | 2:14 pm

    We have a good laugh in my house that the only times I get all matchy-matchy with my clothes is when I get the suit on for weddings or put on the Fatty kit for a ride. I’ve got my order in for the things I’ll use most. I love the pattern. Eat to ride, ride to eat.

  13. Comment by Al Pastor | 07.8.2013 | 2:34 pm

    How warm is the long sleeve? Compared to, say, the wool long sleeve jersey from a couple of years ago? I have that one and it’s too nice to ride in.

  14. Comment by Diane | 07.8.2013 | 2:35 pm

    Thank you very, very much Elden, and Twin Six.

    I am pleased to report my pre-order is complete and thus the painful longing to sport some FC gear and show my love for your blog is satisfied…
    Er, it will be satisfied, come September.

    Fantastic looking kit! Awesome design job, another thanks to the folks at T6 for making amazing quality gear in the USA, and thanks again Fatty.
    You guys rock.

  15. Comment by NYCCarlos | 07.8.2013 | 2:45 pm

    @Davidh – Darn near close to it… I was busy getting maarried! hahaha. I definitely plan on being in Davis next year!

  16. Comment by MattC | 07.8.2013 | 4:16 pm

    @NYCCarlos (& also Davidh)…so Carlos…instead of getting paroled, you’re saying you got a life sentence?? Sorry to hear that (JUST KIDDING! CONGRATS!) And I second that we missed u in Davis..(for the SECOND year in a row mind you)…at least you didn’t come thru w/ some lame excuse this year about your bike being lost/no flights available/blah blah blah)…It certainly was a grand time for sure!

  17. Comment by Doug (Way Upstate NY) | 07.8.2013 | 5:07 pm

    Fatty, my question is why? Why? Why? Why? Why so cool and stylish?

    (And do I really need another bike jersey????)

  18. Comment by SteveB | 07.8.2013 | 6:01 pm

    This is really growing on me… sort of ‘elegant and chic’… I think we have a challenger for the Rapha / Sky most elegant kit

    If only wearing it would make me climb like Froome.

  19. Comment by Carl | 07.8.2013 | 7:02 pm

    99% of the cycling attire I regularly wear is Team Fatty stuff. I have been eyeing up Twin Six’s new Standard kits in all black for those days when I want to be incognito. However, you have came through with the perfect Team Fatty kit instead. Thanks!

  20. Comment by leroy | 07.8.2013 | 8:20 pm

    and black is slimming. just sayin’.

  21. Comment by Dave | 07.8.2013 | 10:03 pm

    Do some of the proceeds go to a charity?

  22. Comment by Skaught | 07.8.2013 | 10:11 pm

    I for one really hope Fatty makes a pile of money for himself selling these jerseys, and sees it as confirmation that we appreciate the writing and fundraising he does for free the rest of the year.

  23. Comment by Road Bike Review Guy | 07.8.2013 | 11:23 pm

    As a fat cyclist i’m going to have to get some of this gear. looks awesome!!

  24. Comment by Lorraine | 07.9.2013 | 8:37 am

    Love it! Now to decide between the short and long sleeve jerseys…

  25. Comment by TMM | 07.9.2013 | 8:45 am

    In a world where 180+ is XL, can you really call yourself the FatCyclist? Those of us over 200 are left out in the cold.

  26. Comment by bacmapei | 07.9.2013 | 9:59 am

    Do you recommend +1 size for the windshell jacket or match the jersey size?

  27. Comment by New Zealand Ev | 07.9.2013 | 11:31 am

    Awesome!!!! Something to look forward to down here in NZ during this cold wet winter. Spring is coming and now my new FCC gear will be coming too!!! Bring on spring for thos of us in the Southern Hemisphere.

  28. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.9.2013 | 11:36 am

    BTW… too late for this year I am sure but for those of us who tend to pee a lot on longer rides, an option for regular shorts in the future would be awesome.

    I know, TMI, but I’m excited to be able to order a FC kit and have it FIT at last. Only question in my mind is do I get an XL that fits now, or do I order smaller in hope that my incredible shrinking woman act marches on? ;-)

  29. Comment by DavisJason | 07.9.2013 | 12:11 pm

    Ordered, I’ll be repping Team Fatty at Levi’s Gran Fondo!

  30. Comment by Nancy_in_MN | 07.9.2013 | 12:24 pm

    @Skaught, I’m not sure this is a money making venture for FC, but you should check out the way TwinSix steps up and supports the causes FC loves. Check out the Livestrong Davis fundraising page for our fearless leader. T6 really came through!

    @Wife#1 I’m with you on the shorts vs. bib-shorts thing. While I agree that the bibs are far more comfortable than regular shorts, I’ve found the “bio breaks” excessively challenging. I’ve taken to only wearing my bib shorts when the ride is short enough that I might be able to avoid the hassle, but it’s the longer rides where the comfort of bibs would be nice.

    What’s a girl to do? Well here’s one idea:
    Seriously, the thing works (with practice!).

  31. Comment by Barb | 07.9.2013 | 12:26 pm

    I’m one of the few people that are disappointed with your new design. I would like to see something that doesn’t blend so well with asphalt so maybe car drivers can see me!

  32. Comment by Clydesteve | 07.9.2013 | 12:59 pm

    @TMM – I am 205, and I am always warm, even out in the cold – I think it is the warming fat layer. (XXL jersey & L bibs in T6 sizing.)

  33. Comment by Beaufort | 07.9.2013 | 1:34 pm

    Love the new gear but it seems a bit silly to wear black gear on a bike….like we need anymore reasons for the drivers not to see us…

  34. Comment by Davidh-marin,ca | 07.9.2013 | 1:44 pm

    6ft-4, 15.4 stone, 2xl bibs ((looser now) 2 xl Jersey So I don’t look like one of Fatty’s Brats. Also have XL Bibs that are more snug but fit great.

  35. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.9.2013 | 2:33 pm

    OMG @Nancy! LMAO! But HOW the hell do you get that thing all the way IN your bib shorts to use it? And out again without drippage? Your lycra must be a lot looser than mine! I wonder if there is a YouTube video on how to use it? I’m afraid to look because if there is one, I would need to actually watch it of course! Where would you carry it when you ride? The possibilities!

    That said, I think I would still prefer some non-bib shorts. :-)


  36. Comment by MattC | 07.9.2013 | 4:48 pm

    uhm, er…@Wife#1, I’m thinking if you tie a piece of string to it you could wear it kind of like a tiny “tin man” hat (aka Wizzard of Oz)? Just a thought…(either that, or…you get David to do his husbandly duty and carry it for you…sorry David!) I’m thinking the bibs are still a no go, no matter WHO carries it.

    I was kind of thinking that bibs for both guys and gal’s should have a ‘flap’ of some sort built into them…maybe using some space-age scientific static/ magnetic closure system rather than buttons or velcro to keep ur business where it belongs…

  37. Comment by Nancy_in_MN | 07.9.2013 | 8:47 pm

    @Wife#1, @MattC,
    Would it surprise you to learn that, at a post oral-surgery appointment, my ORAL SURGEON gave me a Go Girl to try? Crazy stuff, but, evidently, his daughters are big outdoors types and they were involved in the creation of the GoGirl.

    Craziest yet? I’d tried this thing a few years back and was not impressed. In fact, I threw the darn thing away. Then my MALE oral surgeon gives me one and passes on one little tidbit of advice, and PRESTO!!! The thing works! Honestly. I’ve not yet had the spheres to try this on the road, but it works at home… in privacy. How would it perform with bib shorts? Again, I believe privacy is required. And, given the chafing that COULD happen, the stakes are high!

    Meanwhile, bib-shorts are problem for grrrlz and I hope they go away.

    MattC, your idea about a magnetic closure system has me thinking. That’s all I want to say right now.

  38. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.9.2013 | 9:11 pm

    Isn’t @MattC an engineer? And brother Greg? If you two can do aerospace, this should be a snap. Pun intended.

    I say the Chapek Bros invent that closure system, patent it, and then have Twin Six produce them. They then becomes fabulously wealthy from the patent proceeds and buy us all a pair of his new “frequent bio break bibs”.


  39. Comment by Diane | 07.9.2013 | 11:43 pm

    Frequent bio break bibs! LMAO
    That may actually be patentable – I doubt any prior art has incorporated a chamois…

    Absent an astounding breakthrough in the engineering of bibs, I have just committed to memory the locations of all Starbucks in a 55 mile radius.

  40. Comment by MattC | 07.10.2013 | 9:29 am

    @Wife#1…actually, both my bro’s (Greg and Dave) are mechanical engineers, I’m an ‘electronics tech’ (I redesign/fix and then attempt to keep running things my engineers messed up).

    As to the FBBB’s and the “bio hatch” (patent pending btw), I’m thinking something in manner of the static bond you see when you have a big piece of scotch-tape to put on something, and before you even get it close to where you want it sucks onto the very thing you are getting ready to tape but in the wrong place (and then you say bad words as you try to extricate it w/out destruction)…or another example is when the tape staticly adheres itsself together before you could get it into position. To harness that power into a trap-door on bibs would be a powerful idea (it would have to be thin, flexible, comfortable…and stay closed when you want it to, and open zippity-split quick when you need it).

    I don’t wear bibs often, and in fact only own one set: a Fatty 2010. They are very nice I must admit…however, on the VERY first time I wore them I had an, uhm, er, gastric compatibility event that came on quite quickly. Right there on the side of the road I had to IMMEDIETLY establish a clear line of sight for my #2 output port (if you know what I mean).

    Sheesh…I recall that was something of an ordeal (how fast can you get off all the cold-weather gear INCLUDING helmet AND leg-warmers, and not have any of it lying in the hugely abundent poison oak that was surrounding me). I haven’t been a huge proponent of bibs since. So I think it’s safe to say “I feel your pain”.

    I’ll get right on that ‘bio hatch’ design.

  41. Comment by GregC | 07.10.2013 | 9:41 am

    mmmmmm. tricky problem- closure of the trap door flap on the bottomside of the shorts/ bibs. I you would necessarily want to get the closure/ overlap interface away from the seat/ body contact area. if you can do this, why not a velcro type closure?

  42. Comment by GregC | 07.10.2013 | 9:48 am

    I hate it when some crazy keystroke combo sends my comment before I’m ready.

    mmmmmm. tricky problem- closure of the trap door flap on the bottomside of the shorts/ bibs. I would think you would want to get the closure/ overlap interface away from the seat/ body contact area. if you can do this, why not a velcro type closure? It would not be too hard (if you had a pair of shorts your willing to sacrifice) to mock this up and try it. I would think big (on the flat size) as opposed to small. You also have to weigh in the impact of a wardrobe malfunction while on the road. However I’ve seen professional cyclist continuing to race with scant material holding their shorts in place after a crash. Of course these people are being paid to ride their bikes and results takes precedence over modesty

  43. Comment by SteveB | 07.10.2013 | 10:21 am

    Well this is turning into a fairly epic comment thread. I’ll jump in… As I see it, the advantage of bib shorts is that they don’t have elastic about the waist (or not as much), making them more continuously comfortable. So how about something like a two piece ensemble with a zipper about the waist? Then its just a quick unzipping and you’re good to go? so we have ‘Frequent Bio Break Bib Shorts With Integrated Zipper’ – FBBBSWIZ (patent pending).

  44. Comment by T.J. Olaussen | 07.10.2013 | 11:06 am

    Very nice collection. Ordered everything but the jacket. Hopefully I will be able to get a few good rides in them (at least the long-sleeve) before the weather gets to chilly. Very happy that you included a windvest in the collection. Invaluable this far north. It’s gonna be a long wait until september.

  45. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.10.2013 | 1:16 pm

    Okay people – good work so far on the FBBBs+. I see a whole new product line emerging here. You can take the credit and the profits, I just want a pair for myself when you’re done. That GoGirl thing scares me.

    Of course Twin Six offering regular FC shorts during the product development period would be nice. I am clearly not the only one with bib short issues! :-)

  46. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.10.2013 | 1:22 pm

    @Nancy…. I can’t believe I didn’t think of this earlier, and I’m a little scared to ask, but can you explain how/why your surgeon suggested the GoGirl to you as a result of you having oral surgery? Can it be publicly disclosed how one related to the other?

    I’m intrigued mightily now that I thought of it!

  47. Comment by rk | 07.23.2013 | 2:56 pm

    just came across your site today, very sad i missed the pre-order…maybe next year.

    Sorry you missed it. Also, I’m kinda thinking I’m going to skip a year, jersey-wise. – FC

  48. Comment by zac_in_ak | 07.27.2013 | 10:53 pm

    Love the new design….but how about some real “fat” sizes I have lost and kept off 20lbs but still need at least one size larger to accommodate my ample girth and gut…please…

    Signed a real “fat” cyclist

    P.S. I haven’t been “only” 180lbs since high school


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