Race Report: The 2013 Crusher in the Tushars

07.15.2013 | 3:52 pm

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A Note from Fatty: Tuesday, July 16, is the final day for you to pre-order the 2014 FatCyclist.com gear. And bear in mind, when you order a jersey, a total of $40 gets donated to World Bicycle Relief, thanks to Trek’s donation matching program this month.

But that’s not all. Noooo. When you buy a jersey, you also get five chances in the contest to win a new Trek Project One Madone 7 Series, with ENVE wheels and cockpit, not to mention SRAM Red components.

Calling this a dream bike is an understatement. For reals.

Read here for details, and then go buy yourself a jersey. ‘Cuz we’re down to the last day, and then it’s too late. And that would be almost too sad for words.

Race Report: The 2013 Crusher in the Tushars

There’s nothing I enjoy writing so much as a race report. I feel like I have a gift for it, too. Somehow, as I race, even as I ride myself into the Cave of Pain, I store away the interesting moments. I recognize the highlights and dramatic moments; I see the focal point around which the rest of the race revolves.

That’s certainly true for last weekend’s race: The Crusher in The Tushar, an incredibly intense course in Beaver Utah, 69 miles long with around 10,000 feet of climbing, with a mix of both paved and dirt roads.

Without question, when the dramatic crux of my race occurred, I recognized it as such, and knew that it was the focal point of my own personal story.

Unfortunately, that moment was when I had to put my bike down, shuffle down the side of a mountain, undress more or less completely, and…

Well, I’m getting ahead of myself. But be warned: it’s exactly what you think. Which means maybe you might want to take a pass on reading this particular race report. I won’t hold it against you.

For now, though, let’s start at the beginning.

Drama at the Starting Line

Last year, I did the Crusher on a cyclocross bike, which was not a great idea, for the following list of reasons:

  1. I had no experience riding cyclocross bikes.

For that reason — among others, I’m sure, but mostly because of that reason — I didn’t do so great at the Crusher last year.

Hence, this year I went with something a little more familiar:

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“Fatty Looks Into the Future,” courtesy Zazoosh Media

Yep, this year I raced on my Specialized Stumpjumper SingleSpeed (AKA the SSSS). 

The Hammer would also be racing on her SSSS — one of only two women (Heather was the other) brave enough to race the Crusher in the Tushar on a singlespeed.

Which meant that lining up at the starting line was more of a social event than usual: Heather, Kenny, The Hammer, me, my good friend Bry, and about ten other people would be racing in the SS division. 

Kenny and I had agreed: we’d do our best to stay and work together during the race. 

The race went off in stages. First the pros, then the women. Then we — the singlespeeders — rolled up to the starting line.

Which is when Kenny discovered his rear tire was entirely flat.

While Kenny quickly dug out a CO2 canister, I looked up to the announcer and asked, using my impossible-to-resist superpower of asking people to do things, “Could you please give us an extra minute before sending our group off.

“OK,” he said. “One minute.”

Kenny got his tire inflated, although we all wondered whether it would hold.

We took off, riding the first ten miles of pavement in a cruel mockery of a pace line — pedaling our singlespeeds as fast as our legs would go, but still unable to go faster than 16mph.

Within a mile, Kenny’s tire had gone flat again.

The First Big Climb

Some races take a lot of study to understand and plan for. The Crusher is not one of them. It is, quite frankly, the simplest-to-remember race I can think of. Let me explain:

  1. Climb up for a really long time
  2. Descend for a little while
  3. Climb up for a really long time
Honestly, that’s pretty much it. Some of it’s on pavement. Some of it’s on dirt. The descending (step 2) is over in what feels like a few minutes (it was horrible for me last year, but much much better for me on a mountain bike, especially with my brand new RockShox fork). The rest of the day looks like this:

00796 01 1187
“Fatty Looks at His Front Tire,” courtesy Zazoosh Media

During this first climb, I felt wonderful. Which is my way of saying that I felt like I was about to die, but in a good way. I stood, pedaled, looked around, passed a bunch of people, and got passed by others.

I wasn’t sure, but I figured I was in fifth or sixth place, singlespeed-wise. 

The Second Big Climb

It’s really pretty amazing how certain things get built up in your head as impossibly difficult, only to wind up being not that bad. Which is my way of saying that the big washboarded dirt road descent was as easy for me this year as it was difficult for me last year. In fact, I passed a few people on the downhill, which is a bit of a rarity for me.

Of course, they all passed me back once we got onto the road section of the descent.

As I began the second climb — the climb that would go on, essentially, for about 22 miles, to the end of the race — I passed another singlespeeder; now I was in fourth place. Or maybe fifth. But I was doing pretty well.

Shortly after, the cramps began. 

First, the hamstring on my left leg. Then the hamstring on my right. Then some muscle that I wasn’t even aware of. Cramps so bad they would make me cry aloud.

Eventually, I was forced off my bike. I leaned forward, hard, stretching my legs as I walked, until I could ride again.

This happened perhaps three times. People would ride by, knowingly asking, “Cramps?”

“Yep.”

And there was really nothing to be said after that.

The Moment of “Drama”

Somehow, though, I managed to get past the hardest part of the climb. I got to about mile 58. Maybe mile 59. 

And then — without any particular warning — I suddenly knew I had a problem. I shall endeavor to be as genteel as possible in the description of said problem, so as to not offend the sensibilities of those who are of a sensitive disposition.

Which is to say, I stood up to fart and — partway through that fart — discovered there was much more to this fart than I originally suspected.

How am I doing with the “genteel” thing?

Not so good?

Sorry. 

You should be aware, however, that it’s going to get worse. I recommend that if you prefer to avoid the remarkably unsavory details of what came next, you just look at a few of these really nice pictures of The Hammer as she raced, and then skip on to the “At The Finish Line” section.”

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“The Hammer in the First Ten Miles,” courtesy Zazoosh Media

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“The Hammer Gaps a Racer on a Brutal Climb,” courtesy Zazoosh Media

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“The Hammer Battles The Incredibly Steep Finishing Straight,” courtesy Zazoosh Media

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“The Hammer Finishes,” courtesy Zazoosh Media

There. Now you should probably skip on over to “At The Finish Line.” Or you’ll be sorry.

Unsavory Details

I clenched, willing that which wanted out to stay put. To go back up. To stay dormant, for just ten more miles. Less than an hour. That’s all I needed. I was, after all, on track for a finish right around 5:30, which I figured would not put me on the podium, but it would get me pretty darned close.

And, for a moment, it worked. I continued riding. But biology will have its way. And in this case, the way was out.

So, I dropped my bike on the side of the road and scrambled about down the steep mountainside — the only way I could do what I had to do out of site. 

I found a felled tree laying on the ground, knew that I would find no better seat in the near future, and commenced to strip.

By the time I had my jersey off (it had to come off because I was wearing bib shorts), I had begun to shake. My body somehow knew that I was giving in to its demands, and had lit a fuse.

A very short fuse.

I didn’t know if I was going to get seated in time, to be honest.  

But I did. Barely.

And there I sat for the next ten minutes. Each minute thinking I was maybe done, and each minute knowing that I wasn’t. 

And, over and over, as rider after rider went by, I was forced to answer the calls of “You OK down there?” with the cry of “Just fine!” 

And also, I spent quite a bit of time wondering how in the world I was going to clean up. If you’ll look at the photo of me early in the race and the ones that follow, you should be able to tell what my solution was. Hint: there were no leaves about of sufficient size to do any good whatsoever.

Finally, I was done. I scrambled back up the mountain, and took off, one urgency replaced with another.

At The Finish Line

Eleven minutes (according to Strava) had elapsed. How many singlespeeders had passed me? I didn’t know. Had Kenny gone by? I didn’t know. All I knew was that I only had eight or so miles to go, and I was going to go my hardest.

Five last miles of dirt flew by. Then two miles of pavement. Then the final turn, leading to a mile of extraordinarily steep climbing. So steep I had to paperboy it until I was in sight of the finishing line.

Trust me, I am not hamming it up in these photos (all courtesy Zazoosh Media):

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00796 01 3071

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And then, finally, this:

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My finishing time: 5:45:42. Which was good enough for sixth place. 

In other words, two singlespeeders passed me while I sat naked on a log during the final eight miles of this race.

Very soon after, Kenny came across the line. “Have you been here long?” he asked. 

“About two minutes,” I said. 

“Dammit,” he replied.

Someday, he and I will have a conversation about which of the two of us was waylaid longer, and therefore was actually faster during this race. My guess is he will not want to go into specifics.

Then, a few minutes later — with a time of 6:15 — The Hammer crossed the finish line. If she would have registered in her age group, 36 – 49 women, she would have podiumed. This time would have gotten her second place, in fact. The Hammer has officially broken through to a new level. 

And I…well, I need to buy some new gloves.

PS About Levi: Levi finished the race in 4:06. A new course record. Here he is at the finish line with race organizer Burke Swindlehurst:

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Courtesy Zazoosh Media

And another on the course, demonstrating that it can be lonely at the front:

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58 Comments

  1. Comment by Mark in Bremerton | 07.15.2013 | 4:10 pm

    For someone who is the fittest he’s every been (you said it, not too long ago), and winning even, you certainly haven’t figured out the “body management” part of it. Just sayin’… Great race, though – Bravo to you and The Hammer!

    Yeah, I am doing something wrong; I’ve had cramps entirely too often lately — and that’s new. I never used to get them. I kind of wonder if I’m getting them now because I’m able to go with a higher intensity and speed than I used to. – FC

  2. Comment by SteveB | 07.15.2013 | 4:24 pm

    I’ve heard of riders dumping their water bottles to save weight at the end of a race, but this is taking it to a new level.

  3. Comment by Nathaniel | 07.15.2013 | 4:41 pm

    Oh Fatty, a few squirts with the bottle would have sufficed. No need to drag your gloves into the mess.

    You know, that didn’t even occur to me. Though since the only thing I had in my bottles at that point was some kind of sports drink (whatever they were handing out at the aid stations), I might’ve just been exchanging one kind of mess for another much stickier mess. – FC

  4. Comment by yannb | 07.15.2013 | 4:46 pm

    OMG, that was hilarious. Great race report btw.

  5. Comment by DavisJason | 07.15.2013 | 4:58 pm

    “Slusher in the Tusher”?
    “Gusher from the Tusher”?
    I’m sorry, I can’t help myself.

  6. Comment by JL | 07.15.2013 | 5:26 pm

    Anyone else get a chuckle when they got to the bottom of the story and the headline from the previous story caught their eye?

    “Some Things Are Meant To Happen, And I’m Pretty Sure This Is One Of Them”

  7. Comment by SteveB | 07.15.2013 | 5:39 pm

    @JL absolutely. Also, the title of this one
    could well have been S*** Happens.

  8. Comment by eclecticdeb | 07.15.2013 | 5:40 pm

    Oh Fatty, unfortunately I’ve been there too. And unfortunately my story ended (or began) 2 days later with a nasty case of poison oak. In a VERY sensitive area. So bad that I could not sit or wear proper clothes for about a week. Thankfully I had a very understanding boss, all I had to say was “got poison oak on my a–” (didn’t even a chance to finish the word), and he said “Work from home, take all the time you need”.

    Fun times. Not.

  9. Comment by Nancy_in_MN | 07.15.2013 | 5:43 pm

    New contest idea for you, FC!

    Best (funniest, whatever) photo submitted of FC follower striking your pose in photo #1. No idea what the prize should be. Perhaps something commensurate with the effort involved…

    This picture:
    00796-01-0053.jpg

  10. Comment by Frank | 07.15.2013 | 6:13 pm

    Bummer!

  11. Comment by Larry | 07.15.2013 | 7:18 pm

    Never trust a fart (Jack Nickolsen – Bucket List)

  12. Comment by Carl | 07.15.2013 | 7:24 pm

    Great report and great ride by all of you guys. That photo of Levi doesn’t even look like him.

  13. Comment by Davidh-Marin,ca | 07.15.2013 | 7:37 pm

    Well that explains how The Hammer crushed you on that particular segment on Strava. Though we only have your word for the 11 minute time out. If you were able to find a “seat” to do your business, how do we know you didn’t find a magazine to read also? (We’re ‘guys’ after all). Maybe you just wanted new gloves(great ‘what’s missing ‘ quiz btw)

    @nancy in MN. Congratulations on mastering the image size today.

    @Fatty if we can get you out west for the Death Ride next year come prepared. There’s a lot of exposed areas without trees.

  14. Comment by ScottR | 07.15.2013 | 8:53 pm

    I know Fatty has a personal relationship there, but I’d rather never see or hear from Levi or the other dopers again, unless they have something of actual value to add to the world.

    (And before allowing them that they’d have start with the truth, none of this ‘we all separately stopped in 2006′ idiocy…)

    Disappointing to see companies I like still sponsoring him.

  15. Comment by Dave T | 07.15.2013 | 9:11 pm

    Great race report sorry you had such a, well bad ending. Maybe strava will include a bodily function time correction in their next rev of the software.

    @nancy in MN. I like the photo contest idea.

  16. Comment by Davidh-marin,ca | 07.15.2013 | 9:46 pm

    Gives a whole new meaning to the term Carbo Rocket

    and because I’m coming up fast on my 3 a day rule what’s with the pictures? Does everyone get such great photo coverage, or just Award Winning Blogging Comedic Masterminds You seem do have a paparazzi following, what’s next TMZ?

    I second DaveT @Nancy in MN, and since it’s your idea we invite you to go first. ???

  17. Comment by AKChick55 | 07.15.2013 | 9:52 pm

    First: To @ScottR – Please stop reading Fatty’s blog. Please. He is friends with Levi and you will read about him again. For those of us who have moved on, please, please, please do not read Fatty’s blog any longer. Do not pass Go. Go not collect $200. Just stop. Or if you choose to read and when Fatty writes about Levi’s Gran Fondo, please mind your manners, show some class, and do not leave a rude comment. Just. Don’t. Thank you.

    Second: Yet another awesome racing report AND another amazing finish by The Hammer. The lady is EPIC!!! Also, as someone with the most delicate digestive system ever – I can relate! I have finally dialed in my nutrition for rides be they cold or hot so I don’t have the mid-ride panic though I did have to resort to going off course during the Tour de Cure because the PortaPotty was delivered to the wrong spot and was about a 1/4 mile in the wrong direction. I foolishly decided to bypass, but there was a major climb coming and by the time I got to the base, I knew I was going to pee my bibs if I didn’t find a spot to pee. This is in a well traveled area so finding a patch of woods wasn’t easy and the ones I did find were next to a church. Had someone driven down the road, they would have gotten flashed (I wasn’t naked but my jersey was up around my shoulders and my bibs were down). Next time, I’ll go back to the PortaPotty. I still have to be very careful what I eat afterwards – too much sugar or fat and my GI tract has a reaction very similar to yours midrace. I must be crazy, but I enjoy the poopy posts. They make me laugh. I’ll have to remember that the next time I get something new for my bike and my husband asks. Oh that? I had to get new ones because I had to use the last ones for toilet paper. :)

  18. Comment by AKChick55 | 07.15.2013 | 9:54 pm

    Sigh. I must remember to proofread. That should be “Do not collect $200.”

  19. Comment by Wife#1 | 07.15.2013 | 10:03 pm

    I TOLD YOU – BIB SHORTS ARE EVIL!

    Jes sayin’.

    Now, now can we please get some regular Fatty shorts? :-)

    Still laughing out loud… and at the comments as much as the story!

    Either that, or the FBBB+ engineering team really needs to take this to the next level of output possibilities.

    Outport?
    Breakaway bibs?
    What else?

  20. Comment by Davidh-marin,ca | 07.15.2013 | 10:13 pm

    If you’re like me….(and face it, we’re all like each other or we wouldn’t have so much fun here) I would go gather my single gloves (the ones i swear I’ll find the match to, one day) and send them to Fatty.

    If you need an address…..

  21. Comment by ScottR | 07.15.2013 | 11:43 pm

    @AKChick55 Wow, I’m not sure whether that was intended to be an example in ‘class’, but I think it missed its mark.

  22. Comment by ScottR | 07.16.2013 | 12:09 am

    Charity, done legitimately, would be an excellent example of adding value to the world.

    A charity ride like the Gran Fondo is an entirely different world than a doper setting a course record in a race where athletes put forth money to compete.

    I could have specifically said I’d rather not hear anything from the dopers related to (domestic) _racing_ (with an exclusion for races with donuts)…

    But the post being responded to was already about racing. And fecal matters.

  23. Comment by Nancy_in_MN | 07.16.2013 | 4:48 am

    Thanks FC and his commenters for my morning grins!

    @AKChick: Thank you for saying what many of us feel about the negative remarks regarding a tiny little Levi appearance on the blog. I agree that, if a blog’s content annoys you, then it’s time to move on. Blogs are, by their very nature, quite personal to the writer. In the case of the FC blog, the comment section has become a little community of fun-loving readers, so it rankles when someone pops in with a dig on FC. It certainly sounds like Scott wants to have his donuts and eat them too. Doesn’t work like that. We don’t get to control the content.

    Now, @AKChick, about this comment; “I enjoy the poopy posts.”
    I’m speechless!

    And Fatty, I would dearly love to see a side-by-side layout of the pictures of you and the Mighty Hammer taken during this race. HAHAHA!

  24. Comment by Fatty | 07.16.2013 | 6:30 am

    Everyone, I’d prefer we don’t attack one another. Scott’s angry at Levi and others who doped; that’s legitimate. I think Levi himself has said that’s something he has earned and has to live with.

    And Scott, for what it’s worth, Levi is – quietly – doing stuff about doping. In fact he had to postpone our ride in order to do some very specific things about it. I doubt you’ll hear anything about it in the press, but he is making amends.

  25. Comment by Justin L. | 07.16.2013 | 7:08 am

    Great to see Levi still has it, i wish i could make the fondo this year, tight on money, but sorry Elden, those are the saddest looking photos of you coming up to the finish line. That sounds absolutly horrible and i wish i had just skipped it like you said. My stomach hurts just thinking about it.

  26. Comment by MattC | 07.16.2013 | 7:58 am

    Still chuckling about the ‘missing item(s)’ at the end of the race. Fatty, I would have thought socks would be the choice…(gloves are more expensive). Unless they were old gloves on their last legs…(most gloves have only small spots that are any good at, well…you know). Maybe they were your special socks.

    Anyway, great race report Fatty, and as Wife#1 said: bib shorts are evil! (been pretty busy and haven’t done any design work on the emergency escape-hatch bibs yet).

  27. Comment by RodNeeds2Ride | 07.16.2013 | 8:10 am

    You have to take your shoes off to take your socks off, and the gloves were already off…geez do I have to draw a diagram here folks? :)

  28. Comment by Christina | 07.16.2013 | 8:46 am

    The Hammer looks like she smells nice.

  29. Comment by own | 07.16.2013 | 9:00 am

    you should have grabbed a stick and scrolled “pooping” across the dirt road in Le Tour fashion just to keep the questions down as riders passed by – somebody might of even tossed you down a glove who knows. Great story as usual and great results – congrats! I am happy to see Levi on a bike actually.

  30. Comment by Doug (Way upstate NY) | 07.16.2013 | 9:10 am

    Fatty is Lisa going for sub 9 this year at Leadville?

    No. She’s got a different objective this year. – FC

  31. Comment by BigShorty | 07.16.2013 | 9:25 am

    I would have gone with the socks…..cheaper and more surface area.

    Wish I’d have thought of that. – FC

  32. Comment by TK | 07.16.2013 | 10:43 am

    I wonders, how long will it take for gloves to decompose in the forest?

  33. Comment by Clydesteve | 07.16.2013 | 11:12 am

    I have used rocks before. But, then I am kind of a hard @ss.

    It takes a lot of rocks before the paperwork is done.

    So, and I am really wondering here, Fatty – You shill a bit for those individually wrapped wipes, but you do not carry them? with your er, poop predilections??

    In 20+ years of riding, I’ve had a poop emergency exactly twice. And this is the first time during a race. Thing is, during a race I carry as little as possible. Wise? Maybe not. – FC

  34. Comment by New Zealand Ev | 07.16.2013 | 11:34 am

    Great race report!!! Made my morning. I will be smiling Ll the way in on my morning commute to work. Thanks.

  35. Comment by BigJohn | 07.16.2013 | 11:51 am

    Thanks for the good laugh! Better a glove than a peanut butter sandwich.

  36. Comment by SteveB | 07.16.2013 | 12:09 pm

    yeah, I’m adding *something* to my little under-saddle bag.

  37. Comment by Superstantial | 07.16.2013 | 12:53 pm

    Wow, Fatty, that’s quite a natural break. You hear a lot of riders claiming they had a “mechanical”, but you don’t see them talking about having a “biological” nearly as often.

    Anyone know what bike was Levi riding?

    Specialized Crux. – FC

  38. Comment by centurion | 07.16.2013 | 12:58 pm

    A few thing;
    All you had to say was you had the flower on your bike for the same reason.
    I too would have used my socks.
    Imodium.
    Do you and The Hammer have matching bikes as well as kit? Too Cute!(sarcasm)
    How long does it take Kenny to swap a tube?
    I would have used my socks.

  39. Comment by Kwack | 07.16.2013 | 12:59 pm

    What gearing did you and the Hammer use for this race?

    The Hammer: 34 x 22
    Me: 34 x 19
    - FC

  40. Comment by Christina | 07.16.2013 | 1:26 pm

    Also, I ordered my long sleeve jersey. Twin Six jerseys feel so silky smooth. It will go great with my new bike!

  41. Comment by Guest | 07.16.2013 | 1:52 pm

    Ha ha, gross. Hope you burned those shorts afterwards.

  42. Comment by PNP | 07.16.2013 | 4:55 pm

    I was glad to see Levi, though if you hadn’t identified him, I wouldn’t have known who it was! The past is past; I miss watching him ride and I wish him well. I’ve love to ride his gran fondo sometime.

    Great report, poopy parts and all.

  43. Comment by Rumpled/Jim | 07.16.2013 | 4:57 pm

    Man, I hope no one finds those gloves and thinks they’ve scored a nice find!
    Gloves seem best to me, keeps the hands clean at the same the. Using socks might lead to blisters on the feet later.

  44. Comment by ScottR | 07.16.2013 | 5:18 pm

    I appreciate your note Fatty.

    While I personally feel that their time as racers should be done, they are still people.

    Relatively young and healthy people with, hopefully, long lives ahead of them.

    Hopefully they can use that time to leave a better legacy.

    I’m glad to hear that Levi is trying.

  45. Comment by AKChick55 | 07.16.2013 | 11:35 pm

    Fatty, I sincerely apologize if you think I was attacking Scott. That wasn’t my intent. What I get tired of seeing is readers who insult someone that I know you consider to be a friend and, I think I can say, that you have forgiven him and moved on. I don’t understand why people feel it’s necessary to insult someone in the comments section. Please forgive my overprotective nature.

    Also, I feel an apology to Scott is in order. My intentions were purely ones of an overprotective nature for Fatty who is one of the sweetest people you’ll ever meet. He has the grace and class to overlook people who post things that aren’t particularly nice. I felt your comment about Levi was completely unnecessary and still feel that way. Perhaps you aren’t a regular reader, but if you are, you would know Fatty and the Hammer are friends with Levi and his wife. However, if you felt attacked, that was poor communication on my part. I would say exasperated would be more accurate. I took your comment as an insult to Fatty and any class I have went out the window.

    I do not condone what Levi did, but having met him once and having read about all he does through Fatty (because Levi certainly isn’t promoting himself which is really awesome because he is doing things for the right reasons), I think that he deserves a bit of a break. We are all human and do dumb things – some of us do incredibly dumb things and we all deserve a second chance.

    This was one of those things where text is easy to misread. I know that you’re my friend and defender, and I appreciate it. I love knowing you have my back, Sasha. And I really appreciate you for it.

    I’ll just finish by saying I love it that this ends with people understanding each other and each other’s POV’s a little better, and nobody being angry. How often does THAT happen on the Internet?

    - FC

  46. Comment by AKChick55 | 07.16.2013 | 11:41 pm

    Nancy in Mn – I can’t help it! It is so nice to read about someone else who has a delicate digestive system. It makes me feel like I’m not the only one. Fortunately, I’ve never had to worry about the poopy part in a race, just pee. I have come way to close to peeing my pants (hence my mad dash past a LONG line of people waiting to use a portapotty in Davis Livestrong 2012 and peeing behind the portapotty – it was either that or pee my bibs – hydration plan that worked TOO well). And I agree with Wife#1 – bibs are evil but so much more comfortable than shorts. I think we need a suspender bib or as MattC says, an emergency escape hatch. Are the folks at TwinSix reading? :)

  47. Comment by Anonymous | 07.17.2013 | 7:32 am

    Union suit cycling shorts?

  48. Comment by Jeff Bike | 07.17.2013 | 8:36 am

    @AKChick55 Your follow up is real “Class”.

  49. Comment by rob w | 07.17.2013 | 8:53 am

    Save the gloves…..use your socks!! Lol

  50. Comment by roan | 07.17.2013 | 10:27 am

    I think I noticed that a company makes a drop seat bib for women, not that it would apply to ‘your’ situation. Suggestion, when you come to a fork in the road, doesn’t matter which way you go…if not in a hurry. Next time you come to a glove in the road, take it either a right or left take it.

  51. Comment by Lisa in Athens | 07.17.2013 | 10:28 am

    Sometimes, gentility is overrated.

  52. Comment by Heidi | 07.17.2013 | 11:50 am

    @BigJohn: Better a glove than a peanut butter sandwich.

    HAHAHAHAHA!

  53. Comment by Leah | 07.18.2013 | 2:49 am

    Haha oh the glove, that one tickled me. Thanks for the report.

  54. Comment by Jenni | 07.18.2013 | 8:38 am

    Omg. I think based on the comments, we have once again established the currency of this readership, myself included. I too would have used my gloves. And I too would have wished I had thought of the water in my bottle or my socks. Hahaha! How many of us will recall this thread at exactly the wrong (or right, perspectively) time?! I’m cracking up!

    Did you, uh, at least bury the gloves?

    How did this post escape the use of the apropos “shart”?

  55. Comment by NYCCarlos | 07.18.2013 | 12:44 pm

    Fatty, to clarify, this is not what I meant a few years ago when I said “shot out the back like peloton diarrhea”…

    great post.

  56. Comment by Astra | 07.26.2013 | 11:56 am

    I just finished reading “The Secret Race” by Tyler Hamilton and Daniel Coyle. I highly recommend it for its description of the role doping plays in professional cycling and why certain riders make that choice.

  57. Comment by Camp System | 08.5.2013 | 6:33 am

    Thank you for the Race Report: The 2013 Crusher in the Tushars information. fatty, What motivated you to call this blog “Race Report: The 2013 Crusher in the Tushars”, not that the title does not go with the content, I am just wondering. I like this one fatty.

  58. Comment by Mark | 08.8.2013 | 10:11 pm

    Go back and find those gloves and sell them on your website as, ahem…, personally autographed.

 

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