I’m exhausted. Just cooked. I am tired in a way that I’ve never been tired before.
I think it’s obvious why.
Without really meaning to, The Hammer and I have managed to ride ourselves through a ridiculously ambitious season. We’ve both been faster than ever, and it’s been a long time since The Hammer has not finished a race on the podium.
But, behind the scenes, we’ve been wearing out.
For example, since racing the Salt to Saint, The Hammer has gone out on the road with me exactly one time. And during that one time, about three miles into the ride, she simply said, “I don’t want to do this anymore,” turned around, and went home.
I was not surprised; I was not confused. I knew what she meant.
Since then, we’ve just ridden mountain bikes. And even then, we will often look at each other at the top of a climb and ask things like, “Was that a lot steeper than it was a couple months ago?”
Because everything sure feels steeper.
And longer, too.
One More Finish Line
So a few days ago, I was texting with Kenny, who is racing the 25 Hours in Frog Hollow in the solo singlespeed category, as are The Hammer and I.
“My season is DONE,” I texted to Kenny. “I have ZERO motivation to train.”
Then I concluded with, “I’m conceding to you NOW.”
Of course, that’s only a partial truth. When it comes down to it — when we line up at the starting line — I know that I’ll get all charged up. I know that I’ll race hard. I know that I won’t get all lackadaisical and give up part way through the day. That’s not my way.
But when this race is done, I’m looking forward to months and months with no races at all. I’m looking forward to putting together a season next year that focuses less on racing and more on riding.
Because I am tired.
In addition to this last one big race, I’ve got some pretty big personal stuff going on at home right now. Not bad stuff, just big work-related stuff (and some behind-the-scenes blog stuff that takes some energy and time). And I’ve got to focus on it this week.
So, I’ll be back Tuesday, November 5.
’Til then, remember: ride for fun. And if you’re racing, do that for fun, too.