2014 Rockwell Relay Race Report, Part 5: The Video

06.23.2014 | 12:56 pm

Before the Rockwell Relay this year, I asked everyone in Team Fatty to do me a favor: keep their phones handy and take lots of pictures and video. This year, I wanted to put together a montage of moments from the race.

And I have to say, I’m super happy with what we wound up with. I think it’ll give you a pretty good feeling for what the race experience is like for us each year.

And, for those of you who care, don’t worry: this has no spoilers — other than the fact that we finished the race. Which I guess is a pretty big spoiler now that I think about it. But we’ve finished it three times in the past; I don’t think too many people were wondering if this would be the year we didn’t. 

By the way, I recommend the following:

  1. Watch it full-screen
  2. Watch it without worrying about the captions the first time
  3. Watch it a second time if you want to read the captions. Keep the pause button handy. 


PS: Part 6 will be posted on Wednesday.

PPS: If you feel really sad about not having something to read today and wish you had an epic race report to dig into, allow me to very strongly recommend you read Janeen McCrae’s (aka The Noodleator) Dirty Kanza race report. It’s wonderful. 


  1. Comment by wharton_crew | 06.23.2014 | 1:34 pm

    Ok, that was awesome. You guys make racing in heat and headwind look so FUN! I guarantee that I would not be having that much fun if it was me.

    Excellent work, and thanks for keeping us all satisfied FOFs.

  2. Comment by The Hammer/Lisa | 06.23.2014 | 1:50 pm

    Awesome video Honey! I loved it!

    Thanks for taking so much of the video and so many of the pics in this, Beautiful! – FC

  3. Comment by Bart the Clydesdale | 06.23.2014 | 2:10 pm

    Nice video, makes me want to do a race like this.

  4. Comment by Paul F. | 06.23.2014 | 2:26 pm

    Great video! It adds a lot to the epic race reports that you do so well also. And I loved hearing Alphaville. Forever Young got me into them and while the title might be marginally appropriate, the beat and mood were not exactly what one looks for in a race video.

  5. Comment by Jon | 06.23.2014 | 2:29 pm

    No bueno on phones

    No? Sorry it doesn’t work on your phone! (Works OK on my phone.) – FC

  6. Comment by Corrine | 06.23.2014 | 2:33 pm

    Great video! Loved watching it but now I can’t wait to hear more of the report. And I loved the Noodleator’s story. She is a great writer. You felt like you were riding the race with her. I highly recommend reading it but not during your break as you won’t get back to work on time!

    Yeah, I’d probably have broken that up into about 10 parts…. – FC

  7. Comment by yannb | 06.23.2014 | 2:35 pm

    Awesome video. Captures the race very well. Was reliving ours as I was watching yours. Looking forward to doing it again next year.

    Thanks Yann! I’m looking forward to your writeup…. – FC

  8. Comment by Heidi | 06.23.2014 | 2:44 pm


  9. Comment by spaceyace | 06.23.2014 | 5:04 pm

    Darn work filters. I will have to wait until I get home tonight to watch this! The agony!

    On another note… when do we get a writeup on the recently concluded FatCyclist/Beeminder weight loss contest? I’m awed at the top few contestants’ success.

  10. Comment by Trevor Jackson | 06.23.2014 | 6:05 pm

    Nice video. Captured the experience of Rockwell Relay well.

    Brings me back, wishing I was out on the road and not stuck here at work.

  11. Comment by Tina | 06.23.2014 | 7:08 pm

    Wow! I take back my complaint of your fondness of writing in serial mode. The older I get, the more “ADD” I get, ie, less willing to read any lengthy pieces cause … cause it’s just too darned long!

    Though, I’m sure it’s well written. Once I read it. Which will be pretty much … never? (no offense!)

    Cute video! Only makes me aware I’m less likely to take up relay racing. But I do like your reports of them, though! =)

  12. Comment by Mike from Melbourne | 06.23.2014 | 7:28 pm

    That was great !

  13. Comment by Libby | 06.23.2014 | 8:18 pm

    Great video…only concern I have is that the captions went by too fast…oh wait you said to watch it without reading first THEN watch & read…I think I need a dog to tell me these things.

    Made me want to do a relay…or any bike riding for that matter….stupid concussion.

    I hope Kenny (“You almost killed Kenny” lol) doesn’t have a concussion from the wild boars attacking–I mean the box hitting him.

  14. Comment by wharton_crew | 06.23.2014 | 9:37 pm

    Elden, I know you’ve made your case for road and mt biking, but can you divulge if you have a true preference for one over the other? Like if someone was forcing you to choose. Let’s say, hypothetically, that one could only have a single bike, and one happened to have a killer road bike (Madone 5.5 with full Dura-Ace gruppo, hypothetically), but one had not ridden said hypothetical bike since hypothetically moving to Texas due to the absolutely NON-hypothetical wind, heat, and crazy drivers. Now, there happens to be a hypothetical nice little single track loop nearby, and it cries for a hypothetical hard-tail (maybe a Specialized Crave or Trek X-Caliber 9, or something). Hypothetically, would you ever sell off one bike to obtain one from the other cycling persuasion?

    Any thoughts out there from others in like situations? I mean, we can’t all have a stable of top-end bikes, right? :-)

    If I had to choose, right now I’d choose my singlespeed mountain bike. It’s been my favorite way of riding for about three years now. – FC

  15. Comment by davidh-marin,ca | 06.23.2014 | 11:17 pm

    Stealing your space Elden to reach out to NorCal Fatties:
    Up the Grade in SR, Mykill Loney, Angie Gibson, LeighAnne, Yann, DaveT, SteveB, ChrisD, and others I can’t remember now; Lets go race Levi August 16th at Annadale. When you catch him hold him in a headlock till we get a picture.


    thanks Elden

  16. Comment by EJOTY | 06.24.2014 | 6:17 am

    Your video is pedestrian, yet authentic.

  17. Comment by Jeff Bike | 06.24.2014 | 8:08 am

    @wharton_crew, Welcome to Texas! All the things you say are true about biking in Texas. To beat the wind and heat try starting your ride at sunrise. I mean really sunrise (6:30) not 7:30! I find I get about an hour before the wind picks up. I also like Sunday mornings because most drivers are at home asleep.
    If you go MtBike go tubeless. Texas is the land of thorns.

  18. Comment by Christina | 06.24.2014 | 8:25 am

    Now I know what you’d do for a Klondike bar.

  19. Comment by Tom in Albany | 06.24.2014 | 10:57 am

    I spent a summer in Freeport, TX for work back in the day. Brought my bikes. Useless move. Too much wind. Too much heat. I ended up driving up to Houston to ride in the big city park there. I’d start my ride at Sunrise.

    This is only relevent to Jeff Bike and Wharton_Crew and is NOT relevent to Fatty’s post. Thank you and have a nice day.

    Well played, Fatty. This video does count for a separate post. In hindsight, with the work required to edit a video, it likely should have counted for two! I’m still sticking with 9 as the over/under.

  20. Comment by L'Hippo | 06.24.2014 | 4:07 pm

    I love your blog. These race reports are fantastic and fuel my Walter Mitty-esque dreams. Thanks!

  21. Comment by Wife#1 | 06.24.2014 | 10:24 pm



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