Q & A With the Fat Cyclist

05.27.2005 | 8:15 pm

Based on the huge volume of email, the vast number of searches that point to my blog, and the overwhelming number of people who stop me on the street, I can tell it’s time for me to answer some questions the Fat Cyclist frequently gets.

Q. So, did that "Biggest Loser" Ryan Benson guy really ride the White Rim with you? And how come you mentioned him in the beginning and middle parts of the story, but not in the end? Didn’t he finish?

A. I get more hits in this blog from people doing google searches on "Ryan Benson Biggest Loser" than for anything else, so I’m ashamed that I didn’t follow through and at least mention how Ryan finished the ride:

  • Ryan did, in fact, finish the RAWROD ‘05. Furthermore, he finished it with style, a smile on his face and without any particular drama — as if going from 300+ pounds to being able to do a 100-mile mountain bike ride in under a year is no big deal. Major props to him for that.
  • I sat across from Ryan at dinner the evening after we finished this big ol’ ride, and I can promise you he ate a lot more than a leafy green salad. After a ride like that, you get a "pass" on your diet for the rest of the day.

Q. What other ways are people winding up at your blog?

A. There are two Google searches that people are frequently finding my blog with:

  1. "fat cyclist:" To my surprise, this blog is the first site if you do a google search on this term. Five or six people are finding my blog this way each day. I wonder what they hope to find.
  2. "aspirin stack" (and "ephedrine stack"): My admission that I have monkeyed around with ephedrine / caffeine / aspirin stacks to lose weight has brought several readers to this site. My guess is that most of them are looking for info on what the right proportions are for an ephedrine stack. Well, folks, I don’t have an answer for you. I’ve put that behind me. Besides, you can easily find the information elsewhere.

Q. When you’re trying to ride fast — especially up a difficult hill — do you ever pretend you’re a professional cyclist? And if so, which one?

A. Yes I do. Anyone who rides a road bike who says he isn’t fantasizing about being a particular pro cyclist at least some of the time is lying. And I, like most in the US, am pretending to be Lance Armstrong. Except when I’m pretending to be Tyler Hamilton (like after I’ve wrecked and am convincing myself to get back on the bike).

Q. So who do you think Lance Armstrong is pretending to be when he’s riding?

A. Eddy Mercx.

Q. Why do you sometimes refer to yourself in the third person?

A. The Fat Cyclist refers to himself in the third person because many great personalities have done so. He started this as a lark, but finds it addictive. He can no longer stop himself. Also, the Fat Cyclist wishes to disassociate himself from the fact that he is the actually a Fat Cyclist, and the embarassing things he writes are always about himself.

Q. Why is your weight up today?

A. Events conspired against me. My family had a very busy evening last night, so that by the time we finally got around to dinner, the following two things were true:

  1. I was very hungry.
  2. I wanted to eat now.

So we pulled a Papa Murphys Garlic and Chicken pizza out of the freezer and popped it in the oven. 15 minutes later, I had my favorite kind of pizza staring me in the face. Guess how much restraint I showed. I’ll give you a hint: I once again proved the well-known fact that the Fat Cyclist can easily dispatch 1/2 a large pizza.

So there went my "Hooray, I’m out of the 180s" bit. The weekend’s here now; let’s see if I can avoid a major trainwreck, willpower-wise.

Q. So when can I expect your next Q & A?

A. Next time I have nothing else to say.

Up Next: Photo showing my progress, or lack thereof.

Today’s weight: 181.0.

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