Is It Time for a Fat Cyclist Jersey?

11.30.2006 | 1:45 pm

You know, I owe Mr. Lance Armstrong a big “thank you.” Knowing that he’ll be racing the Leadville 100 next year has motivated me to start training for that race a lot earlier than usual. (More about that tomorrow.)

It’s also made me start thinking seriously about making a “Fat Cyclist” jersey to wear.

The problem is, I have absolutely no idea of what’s involved in designing and ordering a custom jersey. I furthermore have no idea how much it would cost. I have no idea what brand would be good to go with. And I have no idea what logos (besides mine) I’d put on it. And I have no idea how many I should make.

I, in short, am the least-qualified person in the world to make my own jersey.

Maybe you can help.

Ten Simple Questions
One thing I’ve learned while writing this blog is that for any given topic, my readers know more than I do. So please, weigh in on the following:

  1. Would you at least consider buying a Fat Cyclist Jersey? I’m not asking you to commit right now, because you have no idea what it looks like, how much it costs, and so forth. But suppose it looks cool and you can afford it. Would you wear a jersey that boldly proclaims you are a Fat Cyclist?
  2. How much would you be willing to spend? I’m not in this for the money. All I’d want to do is break even (and would probably even be OK with losing a few bucks, because I’m pretty darn vain and like the idea of a bunch of people wearing a billboard for my site). But I need to have a good sense of what your tipping point is for buying a Fat Cyclist jersey.
  3. What brands of jerseys do you like? What brands do you hate? Most every brand of jersey, as near as I can tell, will let you do a custom jersey. What I want to know is if there are any particular jersey that several of you have had a great experience with, or conversely, if you’ve had a horrible experience with a brand.
  4. Do you think Assos would give us a special deal if I promised to delete my Open Letter to Assos? Actually, it doesn’t matter. There’s no way I’m deleting that post. Especially since that would mean losing Dr. Lammler’s comment, which I think we can all agree is the best thing that has ever appeared in my blog.
  5. Have you ever designed and ordered a custom jersey before? And if so, would you be willing to help me out if I decide to do this? Would you be willing to do a rough design as part of a contest? The winner would go on to do a finished design and get two free jerseys for her/his work.
  6. If you haven’t designed / ordered a custom jersey, but know someone who has — and has done a beautiful job — do you think you could con them into designing a jersey for me?
  7. Do you have a relationship with a company that might sponsor the Fat Cyclist Jersey, in exchange for space on the jersey? The more companies I can get to sponsor the jersey, the less it will cost me to make it. If you can get a company to sponsor at least the cost of three jerseys, I’ll give you your jersey for free.
  8. Should I just stop asking questions, start acting like a grownup, and design the stupid thing myself? I.e., am I in massive danger of creating the world’s largest committee, ensuring that the jersey will never get made?
  9. Should I feel guilty for padding this list of questions, just so I can get to 10? No, I didn’t think so either.
  10. Do you think my current logo would work on a jersey, or would the guy on a bike be too difficult to recognize when in motion? If so, do you think I should tweak the existing logo, go with a text-only treatment, or design a different logo for my jersey?

PS: It’s not too late to enter this week’s contest to win a totally awesome Banjo Brothers Commuter Backpack. I’ll take entries through Saturday, and will post the winner this Monday.


  1. Comment by Tayfuryagci | 11.30.2006 | 2:05 pm

    I would buy it.
    I’d spend 20 bucks on it, hopefully including shipping.
    Enough with the questions.

    I’d LOVE to see Lance beaten by you. (And no I’m not kissing up so you’ll let me win one of those weekly contests, no, really, I’m not. Kissing up, no.) Seriously, that’d be cool.

  2. Comment by Jay Parkhill | 11.30.2006 | 2:20 pm

    I have been thinking about a custom jersey for my (1 person) business. I trust that you will post on the research & ordering process. I will be interested to hear the details.

  3. Comment by bradk | 11.30.2006 | 2:27 pm

    fatty, talk to racer. hes done several and worked with different companies. me, i like the squadra stuff. you could even team up with him and co-sponsor the team. “racer’s fat cyclist service” or “fat racer’s cycle service”

  4. Comment by BotchedExperiment | 11.30.2006 | 2:30 pm

    Coincidentally, Tau Haas (the subject of my paperclip bike fix story) worked at his dad’s silk-screening company, and he made that white jersey I wear. I don’t know what you’ve looked at, but a local company can print anything on jerseys they get, which are like a generic/knock-off brand, but they’re fairly cheap. . .

  5. Comment by fatty | 11.30.2006 | 2:38 pm

    tayfur – man, it costs more than $20 to send an empty envelope to Turkey.

    jay – maybe your 1-person business should just have a logo on my jersey. just think how many more people would see it. (this offer not applicable if your 1-person business sells internet porn)

    brad – oh, i’ll talk to racer all right.

    botched – i’m looking for something a smidgen sexier than that. my good friend lance armstrong isn’t going to accept a silk-screened knockoff jersey.

  6. Comment by brett | 11.30.2006 | 3:34 pm

    1. no, only because i can’t stand your logo. however, i would wear a different jersey should you change the logo and come up with a kick-ass design.

    2. i would spend $50-$60 for a quality jersey with a kick-ass design.

    3. louis garneau has a good custom program. there are lots of outfits that do custom dye-sublimation, though. you can find a local shop that will do a completely custom design. of course, if you know anyone in the advertising specialties industry (like yours truly), you might be able to get a much better price.

    4. doubtful.

    5a. no.
    5b. absolutely- i have lots of contacts in custom apparel that might be able to help you.
    5c. absolutely. i work in custom-designed t-shirts.

    6. i don’t know anyone, sorry.

    7. possibly. it would be a very small amount, though. it depends on how much money for space, what kind of exposure, would it include links on your website, etc.

    8. if you don’t like the responses, then yes. absolutely. no, you’re not in danger of creating a large committee. only if you invite a few of your MTB friends over to help. i would recommend finding an artist you like via the contest, pick the winner, and keep all decisions between you and him/her. design by committee is the worst idea. ever.

    9. guilty? no. lame? yes.

    10. current logo: NO. sorry, but i dislike the current design. personal preference. and the shape isn’t strong enough to be recognized.
    i would suggest a redesign. something with flames… or a monster truck.

    (that last part was sarcasm.)

    if you need help, feel free to email me and i’ll throw some ideas your way.

  7. Comment by JET(not a nickname) | 11.30.2006 | 3:55 pm

    I would be proud to wear a FC jersey. I wouldn’t mind spending around $60 for one. I’ve never worn anything other than a Pearl Izumi jersey or a Specialized jersey, so I’m limited with opinions. Anyhow, there’s my .02.

  8. Comment by Al Maviva | 11.30.2006 | 4:09 pm

    Voler supports the sport. They run about $60 for most jerseys and I think discount if you put their logo on there. They can print some crazy stuff.

    As for your friend, Dr. Laemmler… I think the back needs some quote from Dr. Laemmler, preferably in gothic script. I suggest:

    “The maximum level of suffer you have experienced on the bike equals having to skip a nice juicy dinner, isn’t it?”

    Or perhaps:

    “Deep in your mind you would love to have a luxury body”

    Or perhaps the King Hell Laemmler Fat Cyclist Quote of All Times:

    “Not being cycling educated, you spalmed it on your balls instead of your butt and this created even more, additional turbulence.”

    Yeah, I’d pay $60, maybe even $62, for a jersey with that on it. Ball Spalming – what being a fat cyclist is all about. Hell, I get all increasingly turbulent just thinking about it.

    Yep, Laemmler: The Gift That Keeps on Spalming.

  9. Comment by Vegas | 11.30.2006 | 4:10 pm

    Absolutely go forward with the jersey. I would personally sport one, and be darn proud of it, but I could also use it as a x-mas gift. The list on the blog left this reader a little cold. Nothin’ more spiffy than a fatty jersey. Voler makes a nice jersey as well as Louis Garneau. My creative juices aren’t very helpful in the graphic design area. Keep up the great writing.

  10. Comment by Al Maviva | 11.30.2006 | 4:10 pm

    Come to think of it, I’d pay up to $66 for a jersey with all three Laemmler quotes on it.

  11. Comment by SYJ | 11.30.2006 | 4:21 pm

    1) I’d buy one in a heartbeat…
    2) try to keep the price around $60-70
    3) I haven’t tried them, but blackbottoms ( are local. Aside from supporting other utes, I’d go with anything that has an 18″ (or so) zipper.
    4) Not even for a ball spalming?
    5) No/Yes…if I can find time
    6) Racer? Whomever did the X-men?
    7 – 9) Perhaps…
    10) While not as averse as brett, I confess, I’m not a huge fan of the logo. That said, I think it would likely work…and one or more Laemmlerism must be present.

  12. Comment by Spence | 11.30.2006 | 4:22 pm

    I love your blog but have never contributed. Here is my 2 cents. I organized a Custom Jersey purchase for 20 or so of my Sunday ride buddies. It was an interesting experience. I would reccomend the company that I used. They are called Borah and are at
    I looked at custom programs and semi custom programs from Voler, Louis Garneau, Sugoi and others. The problems that I had with the other is that with a relativley small order they would not do a full custom jersey just a semi custom. That means that you get to put your logo on a predesigned jersey. I didn’t like that. Also most of those other compaines want you to be a graphic’s guru. With Borah I was able to give them some very limited artwork in a pdf file and sketch the design on one of their sheets. Then they did the real computer layout work. All in all it was a good experience. The cost for the finished product was about the same as what you would expect to pay full retail for a normal Jersey; roughly $75.00 but with a higher pride of ownership factor.
    I am actually getting ready to do another round of Jersey’s and am curious to see if any one has any different reccomendations.
    Let me know if I can help.

  13. Comment by Demonic1 | 11.30.2006 | 4:25 pm

    I LOVE Primal Wear. In fact I only buy their stuff. It’s cool and doesn’t look like “team kit”. Eeww. Then again, I ride Ellsworth and Primal Wear makes Ellsworth kit- but I digress.

  14. Comment by fatty | 11.30.2006 | 4:26 pm

    al – it had not even occurred to me to include a lammler quote on the jersey. that’s genius. thank you. i will definitely do that. maybe the whole back could be covered with lammler quotes.

  15. Comment by Demonic1 | 11.30.2006 | 4:27 pm

    oh yeah the price should be about $50-$75- but for $75 it should be great material- none on this 100% polyester/ nylon stuff.

  16. Comment by allan | 11.30.2006 | 4:53 pm

    I’d buy a Fat Cyclist jersey in a heartbeat. If it’s a good quality jersey I’d go $70 for one.

  17. Comment by bryan | 11.30.2006 | 4:56 pm

    I have a secret. Its

    They have only a 5 piece minimum, no set up fees, and no per color charges! Its an amazing deal for FULL custom jerseys, shorts, whatever. They are by far the most afordable and professional jerseys you can get your hands on. Average price is about $59 for a jersey.

    The Evomo Team has used Pactimo for 2 years now and we are very happy. They even have sizing kits you can borrow as well as website based ordering system which is nice. Expect about an 8 week turn around which is a bit long, but most places wont get you stuff back much sooner… maybe 5-6 weeks at best.

    Talk to Teniqua and let her know Bryan at Evomo told you about them. They will treat you well.

    EVOMO MTB Team / Evomo MTB Clothing

  18. Comment by JET(not a nickname) | 11.30.2006 | 5:23 pm

    I would be willing to pay more if it included Laemmler quotes. I forgot all about him until I went back and re-read his comment. Hysterically funny stuff!

  19. Comment by regina | 11.30.2006 | 5:35 pm

    ok you know you are our king because YOUR BRILLIANT,
    1. yes of course.
    2.try to keep under 75 please, that should be so doable.
    3. I don’t care, I am in regardless.
    4.Dont delete anything please but one of my primary personality disorders is that I think I can do anything.(and yes it can be problematic)
    6.local bike shop where I live does one every year and I would so go in and pick their brains clean for you. I bought my kona there so I am in there as a regular.
    7.sorry no, but if one develops I will let you know.
    8.well that is always an option I think you are on to something
    10. Uh no your current logo is perfect, simple, elegant, and we all know it so if we end up somewhere where someone else is flying your colors we will know them right away. And it should really take up a huge portion of the front and back there are sleeves and sides for other stuff.

  20. Comment by K | 11.30.2006 | 6:13 pm

    Heck yeah, I’d sport a Fatty jersey.

    I could swing $50-60 bucks comfortably…but the Laemmler quotes *do* add value, so if you have to hike the price, I’d cough up the dough.

    I don’t like Sugoi or Pearl Izumi jerseys for the simple fact that their women’s XLs are like a size 2. I’m not a tiny woman by any means, but I really don’t require a XXXL in any other clothing; why should I suck it up for a jersey? Cannondale or Canary are good, though. OH! And please make one with Raglan sleeves. They fit us girls much better!

  21. Comment by Scott R | 11.30.2006 | 6:17 pm

    Although wearing a Fat Cyclist jersey is, in my case, redundant I would gladly fork over $70.

  22. Comment by Rokrider | 11.30.2006 | 6:23 pm


    You said you thought that Dr. Lammler’s comment was the best thing to ever appear on your blog. Well I would have to say, that I think Al Maviva’s comment on Dr. L’s comment rates a close second.

    I would gladly pay $100 for one of your jerseys, IF it included the “Splaming” text.

    However, I don’t think it would be a good idea to try to incorporate an illustration of it on your logo.

  23. Comment by Dawn M. | 11.30.2006 | 6:36 pm

    I’ve never posted before, but I check the site all the time.

    We just got done doing the 3rd round of jerseys for our very small triathlon club at Boise State University. Don’t worry, we wear cycling jerseys when we’re on training rides and we never wear arm warmers with our sleeveless jerseys :)

    We have consistantly worked with Voler, and have nothing but good things to say about them. The design was included in the price. All we had to do was give them a general idea of what we wanted, emailed them all the logos that needed to go on the jerseys, and they did the rest. They gave us a sweet design, you can check our for some of their custom designs.

    They have a 25 piece min. But thermal vests, wind vests, sleeveless tri jerseys, and short sleeve men’s or women’s cycling jerseys all count toward the short-sleeve minimum order. Jerseys run ~$58 for 2color design (but white doesn’t count as a color).

    Count me in for a fat cyclist jersey. Less than $60 would be good for me.

  24. Comment by Born4Lycra | 11.30.2006 | 6:43 pm

    1. Yes
    2. $80 US springs to mind but probably would go higher
    3. All the tops other than local Oz brands that have taken my fancy have been Santini the other was exteondo (spelling?). Good Quality no problems
    4. No/Yes/maybe
    5. No/Yes but distance maybe a problem
    6. No but these guys maybe be able to help or might at least be worth a look aI’ve always found Dohnn to be very helpful when I have ordered gear.
    7. No again due to distance
    8. You could possibly end up with a large crossection of differing opinions and we would lose the charm of FC in the top which is why we would buy it in the first place
    9. No as for point it is part of your charm
    10. Absolutely use the logo. If people have to come closer to work it out then it gives us an opportunity to explain FC

    what was the pass mark?

    Looking forward to my new FC top.

  25. Comment by clydesdale | 11.30.2006 | 6:46 pm

    1. Yes
    2. ~$75
    3. I have only had experience with Sugoi & Louis Garneau, being Canadien eh! European suppliers should be off your list because they don’t make jersey’s big enough for “average size” people like us. Trust me, you don’t want all of these people trying to squeeze into those Euro sizes… eeeewwww!
    4. I don’t think the Swiss sense of humour could tolerate having your logo on there jersey or your followers wearing them ;)
    5. yes, yes and yes, Czech out
    6. see above
    7. possibly
    8. Yes and DEFINATELY YES!! Do it yourself or with one other. Too many Chefs and all that.
    9. Yes
    10. Your logo would look great and I don’t think the speeds that these people go, me especially, could actually be called “in motion” so no need to worry, besides the logo will be stretched across a vast area of fabric so it will be easy to see!

  26. Comment by Fitz | 11.30.2006 | 7:00 pm

    I would totally buy a Fat Cyclist jersey! I agree that $60-70 is about right for a custom jersey. By the way, Voler makes a decent jersey. To liken it to the IT world, Voler’s jersey process is sort of like what Blogspot is to personal websites.

  27. Comment by nathanv | 11.30.2006 | 7:08 pm

    i too would like to recommend champ-sys
    our team used them and while they seem to run a bit small they will allow fairly small orders and re orders at any time.

    plus they can expand your clothing to include jackets etc. (a FC thermal jacket would kick a$$)

    i will begin my design and submit it to you. (i’ve done a few successful ones for my team)

    and finally no offense to your logo designer, but i’m not a big fan and would like to have a crack at that bad boy

    i may be able to scare up some sponsor money from my side business (if you need it)

  28. Comment by Terri | 11.30.2006 | 7:26 pm

    HI Fatty, Yes, I would go for one for myself and I would even buy a couple as gifts for other Fat Cyclists I know. For a decent quality, I would go $75 maybe $80. I like your current logo. I’d go for shorts as well! I am truly a fat cyclist and proud of it!

  29. Comment by Scott Rosenbaum | 11.30.2006 | 7:27 pm

    1) I would buy a fat cyclist jersey in a heart beat.

    2) 75-80

    3) I love Twin Six, they create alternative cycling apparel here in the Twin Cities. They make a great jersey but it is not designed to look like joe junior UCI racer. They could probably even set you up with a Fat Cyclist T-Shirt.

    4) There are just too many bad puns here.

    5-9) no, no, yes, yes

    10) Current logo C+, could use improvement.

  30. Comment by Cara | 11.30.2006 | 7:31 pm

    I would wear a fat cyclist jersey though I only wear 100 pounds.

  31. Comment by Cara | 11.30.2006 | 7:32 pm

    weigh* not wear the second time

  32. Comment by axel | 11.30.2006 | 7:33 pm

    please make it orange, bright orange.
    ever since riding the Womble Trail the day after Thanksgiving/start of hunting season I have wanted a bright orange jersey. Make sure your logo does not look like a deer or quail.

  33. Comment by fatfreediver | 11.30.2006 | 8:53 pm

    Count me in, I’ll buy one, sight unseen.


  34. Comment by heartcondition | 11.30.2006 | 9:06 pm

    Long time reader, first time comment-ter (new word!!).

    I would buy and proudly wear a Fat Cyclist jersey. Dr. Lammler’s quotes are a must have on the jersey. I also prefer an 18″ zipper.
    Can’t wait to see what you come up with.
    Oh, willing to spend around $80.00. Does Assos make anything that cheap?

  35. Comment by fatty | 11.30.2006 | 9:23 pm

    scott – yes, twin six makes awesome designs. but i love the idea of the fat cyclist jersey being designed by someone who reads the blog.

    nathan – seriously, you’re willing to take a crack at the design, and work up a new logo? i’m not married to the logo i’ve got (paid $50 for the one i have at So if you can come up with both a logo i love and a jersey i love, i’d say that’s worth a pair of jerseys, or other schwag i might be able to find. or maybe a quid pro quo thing. email me.

    brett – i’d email you, but i don’t know your email. you can email me at

    everyone – sounds like there’s enough interest that i’ll probably pursue this. i sure hope i don’t wind up with 20 extra jerseys and a debt of $1400 cuz of this. cuz that would suck a lot. although i guess i’d always have a clean jersey to wear.

  36. Comment by Born4Lycra | 11.30.2006 | 10:30 pm

    No way you should be left carrying any costs. Have to come up with a design etc and they we pay our money first before the order goes in. That’s how it worked here with my riding team. There obviously will be a couple of hassles particularly with those of us O/S. Postage and currency conversion etc but that will just be part of the effort required to wear FC’s colours. I realise there will be a number of opinions but I am fine with the logo. It’s on your website and the start of a tradition not sure why we have to change but in the end it’s your website and your logo so whatever you choose should be it.
    Cheers – have a good weekend everybody.

  37. Comment by Caloi-Rider | 11.30.2006 | 10:31 pm

    I’m a big fan of DeMarchi–specifically I like the material they use (my Gary Fisher Jersey’s a DeMarchi). My office Lotoja team got DeMarchi jerseys this past year, so I can probably get you some info about it if you’re interested.

  38. Comment by dodger | 11.30.2006 | 10:31 pm

    I would spend $50-60 no problem. As for jerseys: Being a little big myslef I find most brands have a too small euro cut to them. That being said Primal has a custom option and the jerseys fit very well.

  39. Comment by jill | 11.30.2006 | 11:11 pm

    I would wear it with pride. Money is no object in this case. I’m pretty sure that it would be my favorite shirt since the size-small “Ask Me How I’m Losing Weight” shirt I owned when I was a 110-pound high schooler.

  40. Comment by Theresa | 11.30.2006 | 11:15 pm

    Oh, this sounds like fun! I bought a Euro jersey that makes me look like a yellow and black wrapped sausage. But it was the Lion of Flanders, I guess I could hang it on a flagpole, if I get too self-consious to wear it. My favorite jerseys are Nike “hybrid” jerseys, next, Louis Garneau. They make room for the hips without showing all the rolls….$75 be fine. And since I just found your site recently, any extras that your regular readers say would be great, I’m sure they know.

  41. Comment by jill | 11.30.2006 | 11:15 pm

    P.S. I personally like your current logo. But I’m also in the design business, so if you’re thinking about soliciting designs for the jersey (you could make a contest out of it!), I’d love to submit. I’d like to play off the whole Moab/teeter thing. Sorry in advance to your roadie readers.

  42. Comment by Tayfuryagci | 12.1.2006 | 12:25 am

    I said hopefully man, everbody seems to be saying they’d spend 75 or so, Please just try to keep it under a hundred. I just have to have a FC jersey.

  43. Comment by Weean | 12.1.2006 | 12:29 am

    I have only ever worn one Voler jersey, and whilst it is a very nice jersey, I do find the zip very fiddly. That wasn’t very constructive, sorry.

    born4lycra- it’s etxeondo (soooo close), which means good house (my wife’s basque, her parents live ~1.5 miles from the Orbea factory).

    It seems we have a very good basis for next weeks competition- design Fattys jersey. Not sure how easy it’ll be to post designs, though- I never worked in IT.

  44. Comment by Tayfuryagci | 12.1.2006 | 12:36 am

    and, yeah. no European makers. I’m (kind of) European and I can’t fit into their sizes. Make mine an American XL.

  45. Comment by Al Maviva | 12.1.2006 | 2:25 am

    Hey Fatty, want to make it easy on yourself? Use one of the online bike registration sites for setting up the ordering. Show of hands – who here has gone through or to register for a race or major charity ride?

    Registering with these services is free, and you can set it up so that “Fat Cyclist Jersey” is an event. Each size could have its own “event”. This will ensure everybody gets more or less the right size of jersey. Moreover, if you really wanted to go nutso about it, you could set up hats, arm warmers gloves and the like as events. Many bike clothing companies charge a one time setup fee to do your graphics- everything after that is just printing, and it really doesn’t cost them much to sling the graphics on other stuff once they have the printing set up. If you wind up doing 100 jerseys, they won’t complain about doing 9 windbreakers, 10 pairs of shorts, whatever. The only real bear of the whole deal is the customer satisfaction part of the gig. You’re going to need to figure out how much shipping costs, and then be prepared to do a major shipping operation when 5 boxes of jerseys arrive. I’d suggest figuring out an average shipping cost – say to Lima Ohio or maybe some funny named town in PA with a theme that fits in with Fat Cycling (Hershey? Fuller? Shamburg? Live Easy? Dumas? (not pronounced “Doo-ma) – and use the shipping to that town as the average cost of shipping, added to the price of the jersey on Bikereg or whatever. Pad the cost by a few bucks too because this is going to eat up a little of your time, and this shouldn’t be a bad experience for you. On the plus side, you can probably just cut & paste print out labels on the computer off the Bikereg list (or even set up a mailer off a spreadsheet), and ship the things in padded envelopes with a bulk rate, where you drop the things off at the post office in a couple boxes.

    Now stop making me (1) give you logistics advice; (2) look out for your financial well being; (3) ensure that this doesn’t eat all of your time; and, (4) outline two future blog entries for you.

    And remember, Only You… can prevent turbulent Spalming.

    I can’t speak for everybody, I already have a team and wouldn’t get a FC “team” outfit, but I’d definitely spring for a couple FC hats. A

  46. Comment by buckythedonkey | 12.1.2006 | 4:04 am

    I’d pay up to $100 for a fully-customised, profesionally designed cycling jersey. No semi-custom shirt please.
    Oh, and I’ll gladly part with £500 for the Luxury Body version (minimum).

  47. Comment by Gewwez | 12.1.2006 | 5:16 am

    try – they specialise in this kind of stuff. know a few persons who’ve bought from them and been satisfied. seems they do a customisation service as well

    have a look at this moab jersey

  48. Comment by Phil | 12.1.2006 | 5:42 am

    I can’t answer most of your questions, but if you can make one for $80 or less I’d buy it for sure. I might pay more if it had some fat related things, like a pouch for cupcakes, a gut releasing zipper or your mashed potato recipe on the inner liner or something.

  49. Comment by Tim D | 12.1.2006 | 6:21 am

    I hope international orders are welcome. I need a new long sleeve shirt for the winter.


  50. Comment by VA Biker | 12.1.2006 | 6:28 am

    My club buys Louis Garneau jerseys. They wash and wear extremely well.

    First lot buy is more expensive than subsequent buys due to set up (even if supplying artwork). Not that this is bad, but just to be aware of it.

    Follow on buys are substantially less expensive.

    I’m sending you a comparison of Garneau to other brands we looked at over the summer to address (Word doc).

    Almost everyone makes a “racer cut” and “club cut”. You’ll have to choose which you want up front. Sizing is significantly different per size designator. Just another thing to look out for.

  51. Comment by James | 12.1.2006 | 6:33 am

    As the creator of the original fat cyclist jersey, I feel obligated to come out of my hidey-hole and comment.

    1. Hell no, I’ll just make another one :-) Seriously…probably. I have more jerseys than I need, but not as many as I want.

    2. $50-$70. That’s more-or-less what we have to pay these days.

    3. My club stuff, which I wear most of the time, is Voler, and it’s totally fine. I have a Biemme custom jersey that fits me better than most other brands (I’m a little short in the torso).

    4. The words “Assos” and “special deal” shall not be used in the same sentence until the Euro falls back below parity with the greenback.

    5. Yes. Don’t you remember, I’m the creator of the only Fat Cyclist jersey in existence? You know, the one you gave to Botched? He’s crashed it already, hasn’t he? I’m going to cry. Anyway, that was a semi-custom from Voler, which was relatively easy to create for a non-graphic-artist type such as myself. However, the cost per-piece is higher, the printing probably isnt’ as durable as a custom dye-sub job and the design area is fairly limited.

    6. No. If you have a design school or college nearby, you might see if you can get a design student to do you a design as a school project or as an “intern” for cheap.

    7-9 No, Maybe, Yes

    10. If you want it to do what I think you want it to do, it better have http://WWW.FATCYCLIST.COM in big block letters somewhere on the upper back, or maybe across the pockets.


  52. Comment by regina | 12.1.2006 | 7:32 am

    one word for not getting stuck and having a 1400$ debt. Pre-order, then only get like 5 over, you have the technology for the pre-order.

  53. Comment by BotchedExperiment | 12.1.2006 | 7:36 am

    James, Fatty decided to save The Original Fat Cyclist Jersey(TM) for the Fat Cyclist Museum/Mayonaise Tasting Bar he plans opening next year. Like all of Fatty’s projects, this one is going to be high zoot, with Fat Cyclist memorbelia signed by stalked stars of US cycling and mayonaises (wow, what is the plural for mayonaise?) from around the world.

  54. Comment by dru | 12.1.2006 | 7:39 am

    Fatty: Would you wear a jersey that boldly proclaims you are a Fat Cyclist?

    hahahaha….every jersey i wear boldly proclaims that i am a fat cyclist. one from this site would simply do so more proudly!

  55. Comment by BotchedExperiment | 12.1.2006 | 7:40 am

    Fatty, although I’m sure after 50+ suggestions you’ve stopped reading/paying attention to them, here’s mine:

    I like the current fat cyclist logo, but the “Cyclist” should be centered under The “Fat” and biker guy, so that the whole logo is more vertically oriented and fits better on a jersey.

  56. Comment by barry1021 | 12.1.2006 | 8:36 am

    I like the current logo too, adapted to a shirt it could be cool. The lammler quote would be precious, and almost guarantee a lawsuit or something which would be really cool to see you two go at each other again. Please do not make the word FAT too obvious tho. It’s painfully redundant, and i don’t need people passing me going “No S__t”.
    Put me in for two. Really. No Really.

  57. Comment by RevBudGreen | 12.1.2006 | 8:47 am


    Call John Merli of Dogfish Apparel. He sponsors our team and is in the custom jersey business. email me and I’ll get you his info if you are interested. You can check it out at

  58. Comment by Argentius | 12.1.2006 | 10:37 am

    I’d love a FC jersey, though I practically only wear team stuff any more and just had to fork over for both my amateur team and my collegiate team.

    I helped the collegiate team design last year’s jersey from Verge, and it was a good experience. 2 hours of design work from Verge was included with our deposit. Their minimums are fairly high, however.

    Last year was through Garneau, and it was a terrible process that I wouldn’t like to repeat. This year we have a smaller team, and are using Pactimo; seems decent but we haven’t gotten the kits yet. Voler is a lot like Verge, Castelli Squadra charges $$$$ and their stuff is made by Verge anyhow. My amateur team uses VOmax and a it’s pretty nice small company.

    NOTA BENE: There are two types of kits available: “Digital Sublimation” and “traditional.” The digital sublimation is cheaper for multiple colours, but the colour doesn’t come out as bright and crisp, and can fade more. I’d prefer a 2- or 3- colour traditionally sublimated jersey to a 5-colour digital one.

  59. Comment by Eljimador | 12.1.2006 | 11:09 am

    Hey Fatty. I would buy a FC jersey in the $70-90 range.

    Our company would also be happy to be a sponser (for the cost of at least three jerseys in this range).

  60. Comment by Olivia | 12.1.2006 | 11:26 am

    I’d wear one if you make women’s sizes. $50-$60 sounds good to me.

  61. Comment by ridethewomble | 12.1.2006 | 11:35 am

    You’re way past reconciliation with Assos. If you promoted Dr. Lammler, however, I think he might furnish cash and other consideration. First, he would weave a glove from the throat hairs of Alpine goats (who were raised on a diet of Milka bars, natch) and fibers from the chamois panels of the Assos shorts of past great European riders. He would then butter that glove, using a Victorinox chamois cream spreader, with a mixture of menthol, camphor, capsaicin, melted Toblerone bars, Emmental and Gruyere cheese, ground gold Swiss franc coins, and heavy cream (from cows who lived their whole lives on the first floor of a beautiful chalet above Davos). He would then flag you down with the gentle pealing of an authentic large cowbell at the 75 mile mark at Leadville. Since you have no appreciation of cycling tradition, and will be wearing inferior, bastardized, inexpensive, American (shudder) cycling shorts, he will spalm your balls with the magic glove (with a mixture of neutrality and financial accumen) so you can carry the jersey to the finish line ahead of the great destroyer of cycling tradition, Lance Armstrong. It’s up to you to extend that olive branch, though.

  62. Comment by fanin | 12.1.2006 | 11:40 am

    How about instead of just quoting the good doctor, incorporate his invaluable cycling education onto the jersey. For example, “For added turbulence, Dr. Lammler suggests spalming chamois cream here,” with the appropriate arrow.

    Also, can we start a pool for donations to be used to send a Fat Cyclist jersey directly to Dr. Lammler on behalf of Fat Cyclist readers?

  63. Comment by Caloi-Rider | 12.1.2006 | 12:11 pm

    Okay, forget DeMarchi. They’re way more expensive than I’d be willing to go for a jersey (close to $100) even if it IS nice material.

  64. Comment by Ben | 12.1.2006 | 12:22 pm

    Hell yeah, I’d buy one if I liked the design. 50 to 70 bucks but would prefer less. Half the year my butt etc are busy proclaiming that I’m a fat cyclist anyway.

    My team used Giordana for a full custom kit which is really nice. I’ve also heard good things about Voler’s custom program and I’ve worn most of the major brands and they’re all ok.

    Wouldn’t use the current logo. Don’t think it would stand out that well on a jersey and it is not fat enough!!! I like the Lammler quotes ideas :)

  65. Comment by Terri | 12.1.2006 | 12:33 pm

    Wide the Womble….stop…I’m peeing my pants. I haven’t laughed this hard in a long time.

  66. Comment by Ben | 12.1.2006 | 12:38 pm

    Or how about a version of Cipo’s muscle skinsuit (
    as a jersey but showing all the bodyfat and inflamed heart tissue etc.?
    OK, maybe not sucha good idea…
    Maybe showing a stomach full of cake and mashed potatoes?

  67. Pingback by Fat Cyclist » Blog Archive » Please Try this at Home | 12.1.2006 | 2:19 pm

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  68. Comment by BIg Mike In Oz | 12.1.2006 | 2:24 pm

    I have nothing constructive to offer on the jersey front other than my money is waiting to be mailed. Whether it’s US or Aus bucks is open to negotiation.

    Here’s a few responses to the responses…

    I think Muse Monkey or Toad Pizza could be the design artist you’ve been looking for. I have their email addresses if you wish.


    You don’t have to worry about Jay being in the internet porn business, however he does have 3 things batting against him.
    1. He’s a lawyer.
    2. He’s from California.
    3. He looks more like C. Thomas Howell than C. Thomas Howell does.


    It sounds like Al Maviva is willing to write a blank cheque (imperial spelling). $60 for the jersey plus $2 per Lammler sentence. You could possible get a copy of a Lammler autobiography from Amazon or eBay and plaster quotes all over the jersey then you could retire to the Carribean once Al’s cheque clears.


    Cara – I like your sentence structure. It has such potential. I’m going to start using it right now. “I weigh 160 pounds, I’m only wearing the other 97.”


    heartcondition – Assos does make something for $80. It’s that 18″ zipper you mentioned. Jersey and installation are extra.


    James – “I’m a little short in the torso.” I think you’re sidestepping the real issue.


    Botched – The plural of mayonnaise is mayonnaise, a bit like dog and dogs but without the s.


    I think ridethewomble has graduated from the Al Maviva School o’ Excrement du Vocabulaire… with honours.

  69. Comment by BIg Mike In Oz | 12.1.2006 | 2:25 pm

    And by adding nothing meaningful to the conversation I am now commenter number 69 as well as 68.

  70. Comment by Listless Crab | 12.1.2006 | 3:24 pm

    I think you should go the whole hog and get bib/socks/arm warmers.

    And make the bib shorts like a girdle to put my gut in.

  71. Comment by Sophia | 12.1.2006 | 3:38 pm

    I’d probably be interested in a jersey, depending on price and design (maybe even two if my friend wants one as well). Unfortunately, I’m cheap and poor, so I can’t even imagine spending over $50.

    And I love Laemmler’s “ball spalming” quote.

  72. Comment by kitchen sink | 12.1.2006 | 8:58 pm

    As well as the quotes, the jersey should have a pictures of a paper clip, duct tape, fatties fabulous desert, and at least one place to store a paper clip. Personally I’d also like to see a kitchen sink, but I don’t there’ll be much support for that :-(

    Regarding jersey production, what about using one of those promo companies that will put a picture or a cartoon on anything and everything from t-shirts through to mugs, caps and ladies underpants. It outsources production and distribution and means you won’t be left holding unpaid stock, or run out when they become really popular. Consider that you could even have The Fatty thong !

  73. Comment by tlaloc | 12.1.2006 | 10:09 pm

    Go wool and I will buy one up to 120.

  74. Comment by Rachel | 12.3.2006 | 4:11 am

    Fantastic IDea!
    Do you think there are enough aussies checking out your site,
    to get the jersey??? They might just think Im owning up to being
    fat………….. that would be wrong !

  75. Comment by niki | 12.3.2006 | 9:54 am

    We have ordered custom clothing from Louis Garneau for the past 3 years – I’d recommend them. Reason we like them:
    - the design is exactly what we want
    - the designs are sublimated ** YOU SHOULD ONLY GET SUBLIMATED CLOTHING *** None of this screen printing crap – it doesn’t last!
    - the fit of the jerseys is really great for women – we get “pro raglan” fit
    - minimum order for full custom jersey is 16 pieces
    - 50% due at time of order, 50% due before they ship
    - about a 12 week turn around time
    In terms of payment, we charge our members 100% of the cost ($63.00 per cycling jersey) at the time they order. Say we get 20 orders. We use that cash to pay the 50% fee, but we’ll really order 40 jerseys. So we’re still out no cash. Then, we have 12 weeks to sell/collect cash for the remaining/extra 20 jerseys that we ordered. In 12 weeks, the jerseys ship, and then we just deliver to everyone. Worst case scenario is that we still have a few extra jerseys to sell, but you’re only talking a couple hundred dollars, not $1400 or anything like that.
    - I’d recommend setting up a paypal account for people if you really want to get serious about this – and include a “shipping fee” so that is automatically included.

  76. Comment by walter | 12.3.2006 | 7:26 pm

    - I’m definitely interested in a Jersey
    - Would be willing to pay $100 or so, more if some portion were going to a worthy cause
    - Our PMC team has had jerseys made by Voler, which are ok — pocket placement (too high) and shape (too deep) could be better
    - The Serotta bike forum had a jersey made by Hincapie which cost about the same, which I like much better
    - Louis Garneau stuff is also nice, as mentioned above
    - No offense, but I think you can do better than the current logo…

  77. Comment by Lurch | 12.4.2006 | 8:56 am

    Sir Fatty,
    One bit of advice – get a sample (of anything they will provide a sample of – colors, sizes, material, etc)! By the looks of the level of interest, you will have a fairly substantial order. I’ve had 2 custom jerseys made. The first (for a 24 hour MTB race) SUCKED. The material was bad, the printing was bad, the colors were wrong, etc, etc.
    The second (for RAAM) was GREAT. The difference. The second producer sent me a sample so I could approve everything before they were produced. Still wear that jersey on occasions when I plan to dash off the front, then “make a wrong turn” so as not to be suffering off the back later.

  78. Comment by Uncadan8 | 12.6.2006 | 3:16 am

    Hey Elden, I know that the guys at have checked out your site and really liked it. They have been pretty busy, but they should be in contact if they haven’t already.


  79. Comment by FatCyclistIsMyHero | 12.20.2006 | 8:53 am

    Since I am currently a fat cyclist who is working hard on my bike to lose weight as well as have fun, I would absolutely buy and wear a fat cyclist jersey. Heck, as the weight kept coming off I would even buy and wear them in smaller sizes as I shrank.

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  81. Comment by TonTn Garment (Shenzhen) Co.,Ltd | 08.10.2007 | 10:15 pm

    Dear Sir,
    We are a garment company in China.One of our production department is specialized in producing dye sublimation textile and promotional products. The sublimation textile includes ice hockey,lacrosse,cycling,soccer, paintball, basketball, baseball, rugby jerseys, casual wear. The promotional products include sublimation bags and cups. We use two processes to make sublimation textile. One is screen printing (the order is large, above 500pcs), the other is digital printing (the order is small, above 15pcs).
    I just get your information about your company from web site.
    I wonder if you have got some new projects about sports jerseys at present, which we can provide some services.
    The attached are some sublimated productions we ever made for our overseas customers.
    Please browse them.Thanks.
    If you have the possibility to order above 500pcs for each design, the price will be about $8-16/pc.
    If between 300pcs and 500pcs, the price will be about $18-$20/pc.
    If less than 100pcs, the price will be about $24-$26/pc.
    If you are interested in them, would you like to play an order with us?
    Not only we supply sublimation sportswear but also teamwear made with plain fabric. The price is also much lower.

    Hope to hear from you.

    Best regards
    Xinzhen Hu

  82. Comment by TonTn Garment (Shenzhen) Co.,Ltd | 08.10.2007 | 10:15 pm

    Dear Sir,
    We are a garment company in China.One of our production department is specialized in producing dye sublimation textile and promotional products. The sublimation textile includes ice hockey,lacrosse,cycling,soccer, paintball, basketball, baseball, rugby jerseys, casual wear. The promotional products include sublimation bags and cups. We use two processes to make sublimation textile. One is screen printing (the order is large, above 500pcs), the other is digital printing (the order is small, above 15pcs).
    I just get your information about your company from web site.
    I wonder if you have got some new projects about sports jerseys at present, which we can provide some services.
    The attached are some sublimated productions we ever made for our overseas customers.
    Please browse them.Thanks.
    If you have the possibility to order above 500pcs for each design, the price will be about $8-16/pc.
    If between 300pcs and 500pcs, the price will be about $18-$20/pc.
    If less than 100pcs, the price will be about $24-$26/pc.
    If you are interested in them, would you like to play an order with us?
    Not only we supply sublimation sportswear but also teamwear made with plain fabric. The price is also much lower.

    Hope to hear from you.

    Best regards
    Xinzhen Hu

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