11.19.2007 | 7:41 am

So the “Get A Grip” One Week Weight Loss Challenge — brought to you by Ergon –is over, and…well, I did terrible.

I lost a grand total of 1.8 pounds. Which is a good week, weight-loss-wise, but certainly nothing that’s going to win any contests.

I blame my sister Kellene. She came over on Thursday, and started cooking food. So during the second half of the Get a Grip Challenge, I put back on almost all of the weight I took off during the first half of the week.

“Well, you shouldn’t blame Kellene,” I expect you’re saying. “She didn’t force you to eat anything.”

The fallacy in that argument, of course, is the assumption that I have any willpower at all regarding good food. Especially this time of year, and especially if there are cookies involved (and there were most assuredly cookies involved).

And also, you don’t know about Kellene’s super power: she can make anyone do anything. For example, we went riding Saturday morning. As usual, I brought my cameral. Here’s us, taking a picture I’m perfectly happy with:


Then after that, Kellene said, “Now, let’s do one of us jumping, with no bikes around.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said. “There’s no way in the world you could ever get me to do that.”


OK, I like this picture (click to see a larger version). I’m not sure whether Kellene jumped too late or I jumped too early, but it looks like I’m sitting on a giant, invisible sofa.

I also like the expression on Kellene’s face.

PS: Everyone who entered the “Get a Grip” contest, be sure to send me your results, so I can announce the winners tomorrow.


  1. Comment by bikemike | 11.19.2007 | 7:47 am

    happy turkey day to you and yours fatty (we can call you fatty again, right).

    God bless you Susan, hope you have a great holiday.

    p.s. Elden, you look like Yosmite Sam jumping after Bugs Bunny.

  2. Comment by Bent022 | 11.19.2007 | 7:47 am

    You have the coolest sister! And she has useful super powers.

  3. Comment by KeepYerBag | 11.19.2007 | 7:51 am

    Might as well JUMP!

  4. Comment by | 11.19.2007 | 7:52 am

    Oh my God! Giant sofa, YES! It really does! That actually made me laugh much like a little girl, and snot. Thanks for making me look like a jerk at work!
    Love it Fatty, emailed you my results this morning.
    (*Please note, making me look like a jerk / idiot is not very hard)

  5. Comment by Mocougfan | 11.19.2007 | 7:57 am

    Nice hops for an old guy.

  6. Comment by TIMK | 11.19.2007 | 8:07 am

    What are you trying to get Toyota endorsements now?! Shameless!

  7. Comment by buckythedonkey | 11.19.2007 | 8:11 am

    Kellene’s group photos are fantastic but I think here real superpower is improving people’s static jump PB.

  8. Comment by BotchedExperiment | 11.19.2007 | 8:17 am

    It is well known by readers of this blog that Kellene is a saboteur. I’ll wager she’s in collusion with some contestant who’s going to give her a kick-back from the prizes.

    Elden, that picture gives the impression that you can jump. Who knew?

  9. Comment by Mike Roadie | 11.19.2007 | 8:30 am

    What, no “lay on the ground and make a shape” photo from Sis…….that’s no super power!

    Happy Thanksgiving….eat all you want!!! let’s all give Thanks for those things (and people) that matter most.

    Best to you, Susan and the family!!!

  10. Comment by PC Clydesdale | 11.19.2007 | 8:34 am

    Actually if you look at the photo closely you will see that fatty is obviously not jumping. He is clearly being held up by Kellene using only her right hand. Her superpowers extend to static cling and super human strength.

  11. Comment by Canadian Roadie | 11.19.2007 | 8:37 am

    Happy Turkey Day to all our neighbours to the south! I’m glad ours is a month before yours – I can get a jump start on the healthy eating plan. For the record, I will not be bothering to email my results because I lost NOTHING. However, I did start eating better and drinking more water, so I guess that’s something.

    I know what you mean about the cookies – my boss brought in a giant tub of butter shortbread cookies today and told me they’re good for me! Jerk.

  12. Comment by Big Boned | 11.19.2007 | 8:47 am

    That picture gives the impression that it was YOUR idea to jump. I think Kellene is surprised about the whole jump thing.

  13. Comment by mark | 11.19.2007 | 8:55 am

    I’m just glad I finished drinking my grapefruit juice before looking at those pictures. Grapefruit juice through the nose would have been nasty! Nice photos, Kellene!

    I managed a whopping 3.2 pounds, which I doubt will be enough to put me in contention and sadly only gets me back to where I was a few weeks ago. Now that the challenge is over, I am going to go make some cookies (one of the perks of telecommuting is making cookies or having a barbecue on your lunch break)….My wife–who didn’t officially enter but played along anyway–may have been a contender had she bothered to enter.

  14. Comment by Harp | 11.19.2007 | 8:56 am

    Nice Pic. I hear you on the willpower thing. I actually surprised myself at how well I held out. I am a chef-instructor for a culinary school and it was a week of some of my favorite foods. Have a great holiday.


    Is twin six going to put out more of the pink gear? I went to buy some and they were all out.

  15. Comment by chtrich | 11.19.2007 | 9:02 am

    White men can’t jump?
    Happy TG…………….Fattness looms!

  16. Comment by Marrock | 11.19.2007 | 9:03 am

    It’s the pink jersey… that’s the source of her powers.

  17. Comment by Megan | 11.19.2007 | 9:13 am

    I gained 2 pounds. Does that put me in the running…oh wait, it was a weight loss contest…

  18. Comment by Clydesteve | 11.19.2007 | 9:30 am

    Woah! Nice hops, Fatty! Kellene, please tell us he just let go of your shoulder after you boosted him! (Thanks for the sabotage, btw.)

    My wife sabotaged me yesterday with pot roast, gravey, (mmmmmm gravey!) rolls and potatoes, and my mother-in-law was in collusion with a raspberry cream cheese cake.

    I was down about 6 lbs, but completely gave in to the fat side. Still, I lost 4.6 lbs for the G-A-G contest. Results have been emailed in, Fatty.

    A great Thanksgiving to the entire Fatty’s Army gang, esp Eldon & Susan, who are still in our prayers.


  19. Comment by Philly Jen | 11.19.2007 | 9:43 am

    No, it’s not the pink jersey that’s the source of her powers — it’s the matching pink gloves!

    Me want.

  20. Comment by DNAtsol | 11.19.2007 | 10:06 am

    My heart goes out to harp! I admire your will power with all that temptation surrounding you everyday, thinking a pinch more of this and it will be perfect, just one more taste…. WOW, no way I could have done that!

    I had my own troubles after getting aff to a great start. Apparently doubling your cycling distance only works for the first two days before you bonk and need some serious rest and hence no exercise, more time for eating……

    However, overall I’m quite please to have hit sub 200 (I think that puts me out of the Clydesdale club) for the first time in over a year. Yippee.. Tonight I celebrate with Pizza and wine. No. Seriously.

    MMMmmmmmm pizza (Drooooooooool)

  21. Comment by Kris | 11.19.2007 | 10:07 am

    Never say never. It seems as soon as I say “I’ll never do that”, a series of events are triggered that end in me doing that very thing. You challenge the universe and you’re going to get sand kicked in your face.

    Did you force Kellene to ride with you as penance for her caloric sins against you?

    Hog Hollow, if I’m not mistaken. Gotta take advantage of these unseasonably warm and dry days.

  22. Comment by DNAtsol | 11.19.2007 | 10:08 am

    Oops, almost forgot. Happy turkey day to FC, Susan and all the fans of the blog.

  23. Comment by Pammap | 11.19.2007 | 10:23 am

    Way to go, Kellene! I thought there was no way I’d even be close. Now it sounds like my 4 lbs. weight loss might get me close to the top six. Probably not, but maybe :)

    Either way I’m super happy to have lost 4 lbs last week. It’s a great start to my diet endeavors. So, I can heartily say, good contest Fatty!

  24. Comment by KT | 11.19.2007 | 10:32 am

    Dang, that’s some serious air! How come you never catch that much air on your bike??

    :) Happy Thanksgiving to the whole Nelson Clan, including accessory friends who will happen to drop by for your famous mashed potatoes. Or your famous pies. Or your sister’s famous pies, and ability to get people to pose however she wants for photos.

  25. Comment by Paul Johnson | 11.19.2007 | 10:36 am

    Really nice pics! Easy to see that in your family she got the ‘goods looks’ genes and you got, well, a good looking sister! The best part about this post is that you got a sister who will go for a ride with you. My sisters think of cycling as something that kids do and suggest (not too subtly) that perhaps I should re-read the “grow up” memo.

    They are kitchen commanders and ALL our family events are food centric. Since food’s the reason for existance, and the line is matriarchal it is the women who take charge in the kitchen, and of course the kitchen is the center for socialization. The men are relagated to ancillary duties: taking out the garbage, shucking the corn, stacking the dirty dishes, etc. Take heart. Your sister could use her superior powers to have you washing dishes you lucky dud! Er, dude.

    PS: Tofurkey is profanity not tolerated in our family, and loosing weight is a popular topic bantered about after dinner over second helpings of home made ice cream and black berry cobler at the family re-union.

    Yr Pal DrCodfish

  26. Comment by Rocky | 11.19.2007 | 10:45 am

    you are such a sissy. your sister is nothing to be afraid of. just don’t tell her i said that. by the way, good air. and nice matching outfits. you’d fit in well with her riding group.

  27. Comment by Big Mike In Oz | 11.19.2007 | 11:48 am

    I’m glad you’ve got your helmet on. That’s quite a jump. I hope you don’t mind but I’ve forwarded a copy of that photo to the Australian Institute of Sport (made famous by producing Stuart O’Grady, Henk Vogels, Brad McGee, etc). The static jump is one of their key decision making tools for who makes the sprint squad and I think you’re in.

  28. Comment by Clydesteve | 11.19.2007 | 12:14 pm

    Rocky – You got ‘nose’ on me. What a crackup.

  29. Comment by Harlan | 11.19.2007 | 12:26 pm

    I don’t think you really jumped all that high. If you look at your head in relation to your sister’s head, you only got up maybe 14″ inches into the air. You just look like you’re higher because you tucked your feet up as you hit your apex.

    You’re really lucky your sister came over to help you like that. I would give anything in the world to have a sister who cooks and goes on bicycle rides with me, instead of always hounding me about how I need a therapist.

  30. Comment by AMG in Texas | 11.19.2007 | 12:52 pm

    Call me for your kickback… ;-)

    Fatty, Whats up with the arm warmers?

    I wont be able to send you the results of my weight loss… I stepped on my electronic scale and it read ERR. At least it didn’t read OUCH anymore…

    :-) Enjoy the days off from work!! Best wishes for Susan.

    P.S. – My friend Lupita had her biopsy results… she is now CANCER FREE !!!! :-)
    Keep up the fight Susan, we are still on your support team.

  31. Comment by Sprocketboy | 11.19.2007 | 12:56 pm


    Now I am sorry that I did not enter the weight loss competition (I dropped 2 pounds on a business trip) since we in Canada had our Thanksgiving Day last month and I have nothing to fear in the way of temptation. Except perhaps the binge drinking to counter the cold and the dark of November…

  32. Comment by randomhigh | 11.19.2007 | 3:46 pm

    the law of conservation of mass says that matter is neither created nor destroyed… they’re talking about chemical reactions but is it coincidence that FC lost almost 2 lbs and I somehow packed on almost 2 lbs this week? I think not… now if I can only send the 2 lbs back to FC (you can send them to someone else, FC)…

    Kellene has awesome superpowers… when I say jump, my sisters never say “how high?” I wonder how she got them (was it from a radioactive spider? biking? the pink jerseys?)

    Happy Thanksgiving to Elden and Susan and your family and everybody!!!

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  34. Comment by john | 11.19.2007 | 6:06 pm

    Photo shop is a wonderful thing.

  35. Comment by Anonymous | 11.19.2007 | 6:31 pm

    Har! Great pictures. Though I’d love to see some pics of the cookies that you Hoovered.

    Just sent you my weight loss results. Woo Hooo — I lost 3.2 lbs following a SENSIBLE diet plan. It was still incredibly hard. Only another 25 to go.

    It may not be enough for me to win the grips, but I’m happy.

  36. Comment by Rider34 | 11.19.2007 | 6:50 pm

    It looks like Kelleen is dribbling you like a basketball. But with the expression on her face, I imagine that it is something like a Circ-de-Solei game of horse.

    Enjoy the Holiday weekend.

    4 days of riding in the sunshine!

  37. Comment by dad2bjm | 11.19.2007 | 9:48 pm

    I do not know about the rest of you, but I can hear Fatty with a nice Irish brogue saying something to the effect of those kids are after me lucky charms. Yellow horseshoes, green diamonds etc etc

    Nelson is not Irish right, maybe there is some on your mother’s side?? Since you are in UT, I am sure your family tree is mapped for generations.

    Happy Thanksgiving and you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

  38. Comment by Kiwi_Cuzzi | 11.20.2007 | 3:15 am

    I had a mate that I ride with competing as well. We both did Fatties Stunt Diet but swapped the second Pasta day for Seafood. Prawns, Mudcrab and Oysters seemed much more apatising. We both uped our cycling and were surprised we had no loss in energy level. I lost 3kg or 6.6lbs while my mate Rusty lost a whopping 4kg or 8.8lbs. Nothing beats training in 36deg Celcius Ozzy heat. I even smashed my PB by over 5min today. 20km ride in 40.41min. No Olympic Athlete but smashing PBs still feels like gold!

  39. Comment by Lifesgreat | 11.20.2007 | 6:48 am

    That second picture looks like Kellene is trying to hold her helium-filled brother to the earth.

  40. Comment by Lifesgreat | 11.20.2007 | 6:49 am

    Maybe it’s not helium, but hot air. . .

  41. Comment by db | 11.21.2007 | 8:43 am


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