An Open Letter to Myself About 24 Hours of Moab

10.8.2009 | 8:30 am

A Note from Fatty: Drew Carey has made a couple of impressive commitments:

  1. If he gets 100,000 followers on his Twitter account by November 9, he’ll donate $100,000 to the Lance Armstrong Foundation.
  2. If he gets 1,000,000 followers on his Twitter account by the end of the year, he’ll donate $1,000,000 to the Lance Armstrong Foundation.

So if you have a Twitter account, go follow Drew. And if you don’t have a Twitter account, go sign up and then follow Drew.

Oh, and you can follow me, too. Though I’ll sometimes forget about the existence of Twitter for days and not update, I will occasionally let something interesting slip in Twitter before it shows up in the blog.

Dear Fatty,

I just thought you should know that you are going to be heading out tomorrow for the 24 Hours of Moab. And while it looks like it’s just one race, it’s actually a lot more than that. It’s more like you’re doing six or seven races, since that’s how many times you’ll be going out. And it’s a big self-supported camping trip. And it’s in the sandy desert, which is really hard on bikes. And half of the race is at night, which means it’s going to be cold and dark part of the time.

And, in your case, the logistics are even more entertaining because you’ve got to arrange for what the kids are doing — going to Grand Junction to stay with Grandpa — in addition to all of your own stuff.

In short, Fatty, you’ve got a few things to consider for this event. I just thought I’d write and let you know what some of those things are.

How to Race

While your team will be racing for 24 hours, Fatty, you will not be. You will be racing for 12 miles, then having a longish break while your three teammates take their turns doing a lap.

So I hereby give you permission to open it up on the laps. Race each lap like it’s the only one you’re going to do.

However, I do not give you permission to try to ride Nosedive hill. Because while you think you are technically strong now, in reality you are not. And when you are in race mode, you are not thinking that way anyway.

In short, ride out of your noggin, but only to the extent that you remain upright.

What to Bring

And now we arrive at the important part of this letter, Fatty: the list of stuff you need to remember to bring. Your readers will very likely find everything from this point forward this either the most interesting and useful, or most boring and useless, post you have ever written.

Luckily for you, this is their problem, not yours.

For The Twins

The twins will be staying with Grandpa, who will be taking them fossil hunting, fishing, and to church. So:

  • dresses + shoes
  • hiking shoes
  • socks: 3pr ea
  • warm weather clothes
  • cool weather clothes
  • coats
  • food: the weird stuff that they always want that Grandpa for sure won’t have on hand
  • Art stuff for in the car
  • Books for nighttime reading
  • Brush, soap, shampoo, toothbrushes, toothpaste
  • PJs

Camp Stuff

You’ll be spending much more time at the camp than racing, so you may want to consider bringing the following items, which I am not listing in any particular order, since you have the least-organized mind in the whole world:

  • A camp chair
  • Hygiene stuff: think about others! Deodorant (!!!), toothbrush, toothpaste, about a million baby wipes, Purell by the quart, Listerine
  • a blanket
  • a sleeping bag
  • Wood
  • hats for sun, hats for cold
  • Stuff to eat. Spam, maybe?

Bike Stuff

Since this is a bike race, you may want to bring your bike stuff.

  • 2 bikes, both the Singlefly and the Waltworks. Aren’t you glad you have 2 high-end rigid singlespeeds? Redundancy is your friend.
  • Lube
  • Floor pump
  • Lock and cable
  • Tubes
  • Tools
  • Bottles. Lots and lots of bottles

Night Stuff

I know, Fatty, that you would prefer to do this 24 hour race as a noncontiguous pair of daylight races. This is not how it’s going to happen. You’re going to need stuff to help you see around.

  • Princeton Tec light setup (which has arrived and is super-sweet. Thanks, Princeton Tec!)
  • Headlamp
  • Flashlight
  • Lantern


You know what happens when you keep eating and changing clothes over and over during the course of a 24 hour period? You accumulate trash and stinky clothes, that’s what.

  • Trash bags
  • Dirty clothes bags

Cooking and Food Stuff

Your big secret this year — for how you’ve lost weight while still feeling like you have a huge amount of energy on the bike — is simple. Eggs. Specifically, lots of egg whites. You should probably post about how many egg whites you’re currently going through weekly and how you prepare them. Because they seem to be magic. Anyways:

  • 2 Dozen Eggs
  • Frying pan
  • Pam
  • Loaf of bread
  • Salt
  • Pepper
  • Cholula
  • Shot Bloks
  • Peanut butter
  • Nutella
  • Knives, forks, spatula
  • Water
  • Carborocket
  • Ice chests, duh
  • bins

Clothes for On the Bike

What? Not riding naked? Chicken.

  • Helmet
  • Helmet cam
  • Batteries for helmetcam
  • Lots and lots of gloves, all different thicknesses. Aren’t you glad you don’t have to try to shift with those gloves on?
  • Glasses: bring everything you own that says “Oakley” on it
  • Under-helmet beanie
  • Shoes: Specialized and Sidis
  • Every jersey, jacket, vest, and pair of shorts you own, basically.
  • Tights
  • Socks: thin socks for day, wool for night

Clothes for Off the Bike

  • Thermals
  • shorts
  • light shirts
  • heavy shirts
  • jacket
  • coat
  • pants
  • sandals
  • heavy shoes
  • beanie
  • hat for sun

You sure need a lot of stuff. Good luck on this race, Fatty.

Kind Regards,

The Fat Cyclist


  1. Comment by Dan O | 10.8.2009 | 11:47 am

    Nutella, the best food in the world!

    Life is good

  2. Comment by kimbrolio | 10.8.2009 | 11:51 am

    Can’t wait for the full race report! Give ‘em hell, fatty!

  3. Comment by Jeff Sebolt | 10.8.2009 | 12:03 pm

    Don’t forget to pack a spare attitude for after dark on the bike. In the deepest, darkest hours at night when you are mentally crushed due to lack of sleep, racing and camping all day, etc., you can pull out your spare attitude and destroy other people on the bike simply by acting fresh and upbeat when you pass them. This will take considerable effort, but it works. Reel ‘em in then dig deep as you pass them and say something witty without breathing hard. Watch them explode and fall off the pace quickly thereafter. Songs work too. They’ll hear you coming. Good luck!

  4. Comment by bikemike | 10.8.2009 | 12:07 pm

    please allow myself…to… introduce myself

  5. Comment by Jessica @ How Sweet It Is | 10.8.2009 | 12:07 pm

    Peanut butter AND Nutella? You know what you’re doing!

  6. Comment by Marla Gnarla | 10.8.2009 | 12:08 pm

    Good luck, Fatty. Or not so Fatty!

    BTW, I love your Singlefly. And look forward to hearing a post race report. Don’t forget oodles of pics!!

  7. Comment by BadBeard | 10.8.2009 | 12:11 pm

    Don’t forget your hardcore.

    Go Fatty!

  8. Comment by MattC | 10.8.2009 | 12:11 pm

    Don’t forget the basic digital camera…(still shots)…need those for the campsite….before and after shots of you all, stuff like that. And keep the rubber side ON THE FREAKIN TRAIL this time!

  9. Comment by Canadian Roadie | 10.8.2009 | 12:15 pm

    Holy Cats that a lot of stuff! Although probably not as much as I would plan on taking. Where is the portable sink and water tank for bathing? I also see that you plan to cook – don’t forget the stove! Have a great race!

  10. Comment by Cyclin' Missy | 10.8.2009 | 12:23 pm

    Good luck, be safe and have fun! Go Fatty!

  11. Comment by Frank | 10.8.2009 | 12:29 pm

    Nutella, I had that stuff almost every day before school back in the 70’s and still devour it several days a week. Yes, I’m old! Don’t forget to bring the I-Pod for in-between loops.

  12. Comment by Rose | 10.8.2009 | 12:29 pm

    Teddy bears, dolls, blankies…..for the girls, not you and your core team.

  13. Comment by Grizzly Adam | 10.8.2009 | 12:30 pm

    Looking forward to seeing you guys rip up the SS division. We will be unofficially racing your team on our geared bikes in the men’s expert.

    Another good thing about having 2 rigid SS’s is that when I steal your single fly, you will hardly miss it!

  14. Comment by Clydesteve | 10.8.2009 | 12:41 pm

    peanut butter, Nutella, egg whites but not the yolk. And this makes sense because???

    I would never advocate switching what you believe to be working for you for a big race, mind you, but the yolks are really really good.

  15. Comment by Alyssa | 10.8.2009 | 12:50 pm

    I’d do well to write a letter just like this one to myself the day before I go anywhere, so thanks in advance for letting me steal your idea.

    Best of luck in the raceā€”be safe!

  16. Comment by Chris | 10.8.2009 | 12:56 pm

    I love that you pack salt and pepper. Reminds me of Snoopy on Charlie Brown. He always has a little red and white checkered table cloth and his salt and pepper. I think Bert [of Ernie and Bert] is rarely without his salt and pepper too.

    I’m off to follow Drew Carey!

  17. Comment by Todd | 10.8.2009 | 12:56 pm

    Wow that is quite the list…and I thought I packed a lot for weekend trips…but you can never be too cautious. Well done, sir, and good luck this weekend!

  18. Comment by Zed | 10.8.2009 | 12:57 pm

    Don’t go floggin’ yer noggin! Ride safe and yet crazy at the same time. Oh, and try not to think about how much more fun you’d be having on the Superfly 100.

    P.S. I like BadBeard’s comment, but I’m still trying to figure out what a “hardcore” is. Can you buy this item at an LBS? Whatever it is, Fatty, don’t forget it.

  19. Comment by Hautacam | 10.8.2009 | 1:03 pm

    DZ Nuts!!! Don’t forget the DZ Nuts (or equivalent chamois lube)! You are going to be doing multiple hard MTB rides in a sandy environment. It will be damp at some point, or you will spill some water or sports drink on your crotchular area. You will sweat. Damp + sweat + sand + bike shorts = a surefire recipe for nasty abrasions or irritation around the tender bits. Trust me on this one. Take some chamois lube, apply it liberally. and save your precious skin! Then clean up carefully between laps and afterwards with the purell.

  20. Comment by BCC | 10.8.2009 | 1:21 pm

    Hey, I took my 7 year old twins on a dino dig in Grand Junction, CO this summer, via the Museum of Western Colorado. It was great: . Though I proved I’d make a poor paleontologist- I don’t have enough patience!

  21. Comment by Jo | 10.8.2009 | 1:35 pm

    Hot Chocolate mix and styrofoam cups just went on my list.
    See ya there-

  22. Comment by Jake | 10.8.2009 | 1:49 pm

    Go Fatty Go!

  23. Comment by Anonymous | 10.8.2009 | 1:49 pm

    Don’t forgoet underwear for the girls as well. Replacement socks are not enough. :)

  24. Comment by VT_Rob | 10.8.2009 | 1:52 pm

    That’s a mighty list….I think you’re going to need a bigger truck! Have a good time!

    And when Lance tweeted about @DrewFromTV….he failed to mention 2 things: Drew is Drew Cary, and it goes to $1M! I’m now following @DrewFromTV

  25. Comment by Joel P. | 10.8.2009 | 2:14 pm

    Good luck at the 24 hours of Moab. Ride hard, ride safe. Show ‘em all what the Fat Cyclist is made of, besides egg whites, peanut butter and Nutella.
    Joel P.

  26. Comment by Aaron | 10.8.2009 | 2:30 pm

    Don’t forget Ramen noodles!! They taste great at 2am, when it’s freezing outside. Good luck Fatty!

  27. Comment by Turt99 | 10.8.2009 | 2:32 pm

    You know you guys could really cut out alot of the packing if you just did the race SOLO. Think about it, then you just need your bike, the clothes your going to race in and a cooler full of food and drinks.

  28. Comment by Ant | 10.8.2009 | 2:42 pm

    Magnificent. Given that I am packing for a 24 hour race as we speak ( and have various bike – and non-bike – related items scattered right through the house, I can pretty much follow your list to the letter.

    Although I regret to say that I will be unable to pack either a Singlefly or a Waltworks, woe is me.

    Have a great ride, harness the white line fever, but don’t write yourself off!

  29. Comment by FNEditor | 10.8.2009 | 2:49 pm

    when you read your entire list of food together like that it sound absolutely aweful. Dry erase markers are great for car windows.

  30. Comment by slowdad | 10.8.2009 | 2:54 pm

    This is a very useful post. It makes me want to do a 24 hour race. It’s simple. Just plan and it’ll be easy.

    Tip from the North. Maple Syrup and Peanut Butter on toast is a wonderful treat.

  31. Comment by bubba seadog | 10.8.2009 | 2:56 pm

    i hope you get everything in the truck …..dont forget the kids

  32. Comment by axel in texas | 10.8.2009 | 2:57 pm

    wait! don’t forget the sunscreen!
    lube or nutella are a really poor substitute…

  33. Comment by bikecopVT | 10.8.2009 | 3:07 pm

    Don’t forget clean underwear and one bandaid. You’ll never have the right size anyway so you only need one (bandaid that is).

    Fight Like Susan!

  34. Comment by Paulscarlett | 10.8.2009 | 3:07 pm

    A nude night lap would be ok… yeah???

    Give ‘em hell Fatty


  35. Comment by Boz | 10.8.2009 | 3:32 pm

    Immodium. Nuff said.

  36. Comment by Hamish A | 10.8.2009 | 3:55 pm

    That is an incredibly comprehensive list. I’d hate to see what you’d pack for a week long trip!

    Remember to enjoy yourself. It might be a race but you’re riding with good friends and dozens of like-minded maniacs so make the very most of it.

    Have a great time, keep it rubber side down!

  37. Comment by Mikeonhisbike | 10.8.2009 | 4:08 pm

    What about the mayonnaise for the helmet in case you run out of gas in the dark. It could be a life saver. Remind yourself to pack it.

    “Self, remember to bring the mayonnaise! OK, OK, Self quit bothering me.”

  38. Comment by El Gato | 10.8.2009 | 4:57 pm

    BACON! You forgot the BACON!

  39. Comment by Jason | 10.8.2009 | 5:09 pm

    Good luck on the race!! (be safe, but ride like the wind!)

  40. Comment by Mike Roadie | 10.8.2009 | 5:10 pm

    Way to go Drew!!!!!


  41. Comment by AngieG | 10.8.2009 | 5:33 pm

    Fatty, Fatty- you can’t forget to bring extra batteries! You know when you think everything is going great, your light goes out and you don’t have any friggin batteries!!
    I concur to also make sure the DZ Nuts is in the bag. YIKES, very necessary. You can’t represent yourself as the The “Sexy” Fat Cyclist if your failure to properly lube results in you walking around like you messed your pants. That’s definitely no good.

    Have a great time and looking forward to the video. :-)

  42. Comment by Lizzylou | 10.8.2009 | 5:41 pm

    You forgot to pack the laptop for the liveblogging while you are hanging around camp. Are you just going to leave us all hanging till all 24 hours are over?

  43. Comment by ChefJT | 10.8.2009 | 5:56 pm

    Dear Fatty:

    If you forget that you’re not technically strong and you do decide to go down nosedive hill (the way you endo’d on me at Leadville,” please remember its Walt’s turn to crash!

    Love and affection:

    Your Singlefly

  44. Comment by Kathleen@ForgingAhead | 10.8.2009 | 6:05 pm

    I love lists! They warm my heart. I know, I’m sick like that. But organizing events is in my blood.

    My Bert (not Ernie & Bert) loves Cholula too! It’s magic sauce.

    Good luck this weekend! I predict much fun and many many stories fabulously shared.

  45. Comment by Haven (used to be Kt) | 10.8.2009 | 6:07 pm

    So…. are you cooking your eggs over the CarboRocket? Or will there be a stove and fuel for said stove already there? Because, you know, raw egg whites? Eeewwwww.

    And yeah, clean underwear for the kids is a big important thing. Don’t forget that.

    And clean underwear for yourself, too. Because, you know, EEEEWWWW!!!!

  46. Comment by Nick - seattle | 10.8.2009 | 6:27 pm

    Good luck mate – Highly recommend Crocs for when you are not on the bike – give your feet a rest.
    Swing by Costco and get a tin of the Macadamia nuts. Great on the bike energy food.
    Also, pack a hot tub to loung in between laps.

    I think that’s it.

  47. Comment by Anonymous | 10.8.2009 | 7:12 pm

    Why are you bringing Listerine???

  48. Comment by Born 4Lycra | 10.8.2009 | 8:30 pm

    Have Fun!

  49. Comment by Andy Reed | 10.8.2009 | 9:12 pm

    Your race list is similar to what I would bring. Cholula is essential. The only thing you seem to be missing is Bacon.

    Good move on not riding Nosedive. You should be fast enough now that it will not matter. Also, you can always default to “I’m on a rigid singlespeed.”

    This is coming from one of the Granny Gear 24 hour rigid SS co-champion teams from 2008. We didn’t even have to race at Moab to keep our co-title. We hold every SS record at what was the 24 hours of Killington.

    Be fast and keep the rubber side down.

  50. Comment by Pinkrrt | 10.8.2009 | 9:58 pm

    What is choulua????

  51. Comment by Carl | 10.9.2009 | 8:49 am

    Have a great race and a great time. Is everyone wearing their Team Fat Cyclist gear?

  52. Comment by Tom Fury | 10.9.2009 | 9:20 am

    Oh yeah … Spam. I love that stuff, but then again, I always hike up my pants, too.

  53. Comment by Jeffy | 10.9.2009 | 9:24 am

    Sun Shower and towels (and maybe a tarp for modesty)

    Nothing feels better than a quick warm rinse after a lap or race.

    Have a great time! Jeffy

  54. Comment by ChickWhoRips | 10.9.2009 | 10:18 am

    Don’t forget a robe they are very popular during downtime between laps. That was you can air everything out.

  55. Comment by kiwi | 10.9.2009 | 10:31 am

    Done many 24 hour races….Its a head game! If you think you can or think you can’t YOU ARE RIGHT!

    stay up right!


  56. Comment by HappyBiker | 10.9.2009 | 11:46 am

    Or you could just wear the same thing the whole time…
    Seriously to all of Fatty’s readers – Drew has a great challenge re. number of followers – currently up to 68,945.

  57. Comment by BonzoGal | 10.9.2009 | 12:00 pm

    Don’t like Drew’s politics much, but I’ll follow him ’til he coughs up the dough.

  58. Pingback by Me and Nick Hornby « Forging Ahead | 10.9.2009 | 12:58 pm

    [...] then wandered through the lush garden of my favorite blogs. Fat Cyclist used the word noggin in his post too and it gave me a such a giggle. In short, ride out of your [...]

  59. Comment by Heather | 10.9.2009 | 1:48 pm

    Have a GREAT ride!! Can’t wait to read the recap. And so nice to know that I’m not the only person in the world that makes lists in groups. And definitely following @DrewfromTV (and you…)! Go Fatty!!

  60. Comment by buckythedonkey | 10.9.2009 | 2:10 pm

    I am Drew’s 69,485th follower. Whoever he is.

  61. Comment by rachel | 10.9.2009 | 3:48 pm

    ***Comment by Clydesteve | 10.8.2009 | 12:41 pm

    peanut butter, Nutella, egg whites but not the yolk. And this makes sense because???***

    Protein. Lots and lots of protein. And the kind of fat that’s good for you.

  62. Comment by Mary in NC | 10.9.2009 | 4:04 pm

    WOOT Nutella made the list. You are GOLDEN

  63. Comment by Zed | 10.9.2009 | 4:51 pm

    The race start is getting closer, Fatty. If you read this before the race, let me just say, GET SOME SLEEP ALREADY! And, for heaven’s sake, have a good, safe race.

    Sincerely, I hope it’s a blast!

  64. Comment by Jeb | 10.9.2009 | 7:55 pm

    Exhausting. Now I know why I gave that up (besides the fact that I am fat). Very clever way to kill two pigeons with one rock. Nosedive hill isn’t THAT bad, now, is it? Just because guys that tried it and failed lay around on stretchers waiting for the meat wagon to come back for another load, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t ride it, right? You don’t have a history of crashing in technical situations, do you?

    I hope you didn’t stuff your twins in the wrong bag, and send your clothes and food off to grandpa’s house. That would suck.

  65. Comment by Big Mike In Oz | 10.10.2009 | 2:37 am

    Umm…..? Charge the Princeton Tec light setup.

  66. Comment by Miles Archer | 10.10.2009 | 9:10 am

    Probably too late, but are you going to wash the cookware and dishes? soap might be a good idea.

    Also, you need a few big ziplock bags to stick your stinky riding clothes in.

    A clothesline and pins might be good so you can rinse of your stinky riding clothes and have a hope of them drying before putting them in a ziplock, or god forbid, having to wear them on another leg of the race.

  67. Comment by Laura H. | 10.10.2009 | 2:31 pm

    Two words for you, Louis Baker…I’m just sayin’! :)

    Go E!

  68. Comment by Sasha | 10.10.2009 | 6:40 pm

    Yay! I can’t wait to read about it! :)

  69. Comment by Bill H-D | 10.10.2009 | 8:21 pm

    Live Team Fatty results here:

  70. Comment by Chris | 10.10.2009 | 10:04 pm

    Hey, Just a quick shout out to the Fat Cyclist Jersey wearer on the Seagull Century ( today… ‘nice jersey!!’ (saw you in downtown Berlin, MD)

  71. Comment by Frank | 10.11.2009 | 7:31 am

    What happened to Rick Sunderlage (not his real name) in the 13th lap? Maybe I don’t read the chart correctly but it looks like he is out there riding for 3:24 hours compared to the 1:34 hours of Kenny before him. I hope nothing happened…

  72. Comment by BrianM | 10.11.2009 | 8:32 am

    Be interesting to find out what happened to Fatty on lap 10 and 14 – hopefully everything is ok

  73. Comment by BrianM | 10.11.2009 | 9:09 am

    Or maybe the way the results page updates is just strange

  74. Comment by Gunther | 10.11.2009 | 3:37 pm

    Congratulation to your second place in the Single Rigid category. Great stuff. I’m looking forward to all the behind-the-scenes-footage (pictures, videos, stories…). Did all the equipment work ok?


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