On the Proper Use of Bib Shorts

02.18.2010 | 8:42 am

A Note from Fatty: If you read my post on the H2O Audio headset from a couple days ago and are considering buying one, you can get a 20% discount on anything from the H2O Audio website – including the Interval 3G Waterproof Headphone System – including the by entering the discount code FatCyclist20 at checkout. (Full Disclosure: I do not get any of the proceeds from any of these sales — this is just something nice the H2O Audio people are doing because it looked like a lot of you were interested.)

For the first few years of my cycling life, I wore bike shorts with an elastic waist. This was OK, though I never really cared for the way the elastic cut into my waist, while my belly flopped over the band.

And then I tried my first pair of bib shorts, after which I quickly discarded all my elastic waist shorts.

Yes, bib shorts are really that much better. For one thing, they keep the chamois snug against your nethers. For another — much more important — thing, they keep your stomach compressed, giving you the same benefit William Shatner had in the first Star Trek series. Which seems only fair.

Also, they look dapper.

And in short (ho ho!): I love bib shorts.

Which means that I’m exactly the right person to answer the following email:

On my ride the other day I spied something I’d never seen before. A cyclist riding in bib nicks only. Of course I quickly checked his bike for signs that he was a triathlete, that strange sub-set of cyclists which you’ve quite rightly pointed out in the past are dangerous and to be avoided. But there were none. So it’s quite obvious from that comprehensive check that we can rule that option out. So there you have it. Someone riding in bib nicks only. OK. And shoes and helmet – he wasn’t totally crazy.

As you can well imagine, this left me somewhat confused. Like most people, I feel much more comfortable when I can pigeon-hole people in accordance with my own misconceptions and biases. But here was someone who defied all classification because I realised that I didn’t have any rules of thumb, codes or standards to apply.

In such a disturbing dilemma and time of distress you are the only one I could think of to turn to. A kind of Agony Aunt, or as I’d prefer to think of it Modern Guru. At least for all things cycling, but more probably for everything, such is your insight and breadth of experience.

So, dear Fatty, what is the correct dress for a road cyclist? Is it acceptable to only wear bib nicks when it’s really hot and steamy? If so, does that mean it’s also ok to ride just in regular nicks with no jersey?

Is wearing no socks the start of poor cycling dress – the first step on the slippery slope to cycling dress purgatory?

Help me oh wise one. What is the correct etiquette?



Thanks for your question, Paul! The short answer to your question is that this rider was exactly right to be wearing nothing but bib shorts (or “bib nicks” as you Australians adorably put it) on his ride. But the circumstances in which bib shorts — and nothing but bib shorts — are appropriate goes much, much further than merely on the bike.

I shall enumerate.

For Cycling

Let’s begin by addressing the question at hand. The truth is, bib shorts are so attractive that it’s a shame to cover them with a jersey. And really, why would you want the extra weight? Besides, if you have a hairy chest (and / or shoulders and / or back) you ought to share that with the world.

One caveat, however: bibs do not provide quite as much protection as a jersey in the case of an accident. Not that a jersey protects you from a hard impact, but it can reduce road rash to a degree.

For this reason, you should always wear a jersey over your bib shorts during the rides where you expect to crash, much as you should wear a helmet during those rides.

For extra-attractive awesomeness, I especially recommend wearing a Camelbak over your bibshorts when mountain biking. I guarantee an interesting set of tanlines.

For Swimming

What many people do not realize is that bib shorts also make terrific swim suits! And in fact I think you might find that you would not be the first person to wear such an outfit, as demonstrated in the below photograph.


Really, all you need to complete your look is a parasol, and perhaps a waxed moustache.

Note: Be careful of the chamois, which can hinder movement and become somewhat uncomfortable when soggy.

For Eating

Something most people don’t realize about bib shorts is that they are awesome for more than just athletic activities. I hope that it is not revealing too much to say that I also wear bib shorts when I eat, especially when I am sitting on a couch, eating chips and drinking a favorite beverage.

Why? Simple. By pulling the front part of the bib short forward, I have a ready-made kangaroo pouch of sorts, one that will hold at least 3/4 of a bag of chips. Depending on my mood, I will stuff the bag into the pouch, or simply pour the chips down into the opening.

Either way, I’ve got easy access to my chips, and the chips stay with me when I move.

Let me make it clear, though: the pouch is not the only thing the bib shorts will hold. Consider, for a moment, Twizzlers. Or Red Vines. (I don’t want to get into an argument right now over which is better.) You can easily stick several of your favorite red licorice into each shoulder strap, giving you unprecedented access.

And really, this is just the beginning. With all that lycra, the places to hold your favorite foods and beverages close to your body is only limited by your imagination. And by how tight your bib shorts are to begin with, I suppose.

Try eating and watching TV with your bib shorts on. You’ll thank me.

In Triathalons

One place where I do not recommend wearing your bib shorts without a jersey, however, is when participating in a Triathalon. The reason for this is simple: triathaletes have their own clothing rules and customs, and it is important that we observe and obey these.

Hence, if you are going to wear bib shorts when participating in a triathalon, you should also wear a half-shirt. That’s what I’m going to do in the St. George Ironman in May, and I am going to look hot.

Here’s what I’m going to look like:


Nice, huh?

In the interest of accuracy, I want to point out that my bib shorts do not do quite as good of a job in holding my muffin top in as shown in this photograph.

And my quads look about thirty times as awesome.

Other Questions Answered

Paul also wanted to know whether it is allowable to wear regular shorts without a jersey. The answer is — again — “yes,” but with a few caveats: it is permissible to wear regular shorts without a jersey only if

  1. You have 8% or lower bodyfat
  2. You have no hair on your back or shoulders
  3. Your skin is not so pasty white that bystanders must wear special eyewear or risk damage to their retinas.

I should point out that owing to one or more — or all — of the above criteria, I have never worn cycling shorts without a jersey.


  1. Comment by Adventure Nell | 02.18.2010 | 12:08 pm

    Hilarious Fatty! The visual of bib shorts, chips and twizzlers made my day. Thanks for the Thursday laugh :)

  2. Comment by Fuzzy | 02.18.2010 | 12:12 pm


    Without doubt, your status as Style Guru Numero Uno has just been cemented!

    As for the argument between Twizzlers and Red Vines, I can put you out of your misery. Twizzlers rock!
    Number 2 Son says so, so it must be so!

    Luv ‘n Stuff
    Fuzzy from the UK

  3. Comment by Keylin1994 | 02.18.2010 | 12:18 pm

    My wife has accused me of looking like Borat in his bathing suit when wearing my bib shorts without a jersey prior to a ride (I would never dream of leaving the house looking like this).

  4. Comment by Anon | 02.18.2010 | 12:24 pm

    Ummm…first rule of acting like a triathlete – NOT SPELLING TRIATHLON WITH AN “A” IN THE MIDDLE OF IT!

    Thanks for catching that mistake! I’ve since corrected my misspelling of triathlete to the more proper “triathalete.” – FC

  5. Comment by j2dahizzay | 02.18.2010 | 12:28 pm

    Love it big guy. H2 Audio should be honored you are endorsing them.

  6. Comment by Jen Gatz | 02.18.2010 | 12:32 pm

    Awesome post, totally cracking up… but now that you are going to enter the world of Ironman with the likes of us triathletes out there, I feel the need to correct your “triath-a-lon” speak, almost always spoken that way by non-triathletes, it’s just “triathlon” Fatty!

    Thanks for catching that mistake! I’ve since corrected my misspelling of triathlete to the more proper “triathalete.” – FC

  7. Comment by Jabernat | 02.18.2010 | 12:33 pm

    I wonder if wearing bib shorts, and bib shorts only, would be admissible at my office. Of course, helmet and shoes would be included as well. Safety being very important.

  8. Comment by Rantwick | 02.18.2010 | 12:34 pm

    Do they make super strong girdle-likle bib shorts capable of flattening a middle aged beer gut? If so, I could start wearing real jerseys instead of baggier wicking shirts… hmmm. As always, you have given me much to ponder.

  9. Comment by Dan in Sac | 02.18.2010 | 12:34 pm

    Red Vines, no question.

  10. Comment by KyClyde | 02.18.2010 | 12:36 pm

    I thought the first rule of being a triathlete was that you did not talk about being a triathlete…Oh wait, that’s fight club.

  11. Comment by Dr. Lammler | 02.18.2010 | 12:40 pm

    Your photoshop of my “Luxury Body Ad” looks great… except your head is too big.

    I won’t comment on that.

    I don’t want to jeopardize our friendship.

  12. Comment by Adventure Monkey | 02.18.2010 | 12:47 pm

    Anyone have a favorite bib short? Looks like I haven’t really lived.

  13. Comment by Matt'Sea' | 02.18.2010 | 12:51 pm

    A great post…was snickering all the way down, then I broached the Assos photo and lost it…you sir are an absolute madman. I think you should make sure to donate your brain to science (someday) as it surely works in a unique yet wonderful way! Honestly…you need to quit your day job and just write a daily column for some ginormous newspaper (or magazine, or both). Your posts are as good (or better in most cases) than anything I find in the mags I do subscribe to (and some of them are quite good).

    Though like others, I do feel a good intervention is in order here to save you. Next thing you know you’ll have a flat bar TT bike (or three) and the Singlefly will be gathering dust. Isn’t there a pill or something you can take to get this nonsense out of your head? Your core team needs to take this as their mission. Save Fatty. PLEASE!

  14. Comment by Jenn | 02.18.2010 | 12:59 pm

    Again with the Coke Zero up my nose. Thanks for that!! The photo is priceless!!

  15. Comment by Jeff | 02.18.2010 | 1:01 pm

    I know you either spelled triathlon or triathalete wrong – I’m not sure which. but I have to believe that wearing bibs only would be totally acceptable in a triathAlon, because you could fit lots of brats in that pouch.

    Thanks for catching that mistake! I’ve since corrected my misspelling of triathlete to the more proper “triathalete.” – FC

  16. Comment by bikemike | 02.18.2010 | 1:04 pm

    trick question, one should NEVER wear regular cycling shorts, with or without jersey.

  17. Comment by pipebaum | 02.18.2010 | 1:11 pm

    You are a tri guy now. That means no more shorts (bib or otherwise) for you have to start riding centuries in a speedo.

    Do they make chamois lined speedo’s?

  18. Comment by Kristina | 02.18.2010 | 1:15 pm

    While I definitely used to agree that bibshorts should never be worn without a jersey, I succumbed to the temptation last summer while riding at the track in the middle of a Houston summer. Let me tell you, it is SOOO much more comfortable and they guys I ride with never complained. I still would never dream of leaving the house for a road ride without a jersey on.

  19. Comment by Philly Jen | 02.18.2010 | 1:19 pm

    I know there are female cyclists out there who love their bib shorts, but I have to admit that I don’t really get it. As far as I’m concerned,

    Bibs + boobs = boo-boo

    Meanwhile, most female riders have some passing acquaintance with a piece of apparel that relies entirely on a waistband to stay put.

    It’s called a skirt.

    P.S. Nice Tucci-face on that luxury body.

  20. Comment by jilrubia | 02.18.2010 | 1:21 pm

    That’s it. Stanley must be calling his attorney, right now!

    Thanks for the awesomeness. I almost sputtered birthday cake on my screen. Hey, can you re-link/re-post/regurgitate your recipe for a cake shake?

  21. Comment by Lana | 02.18.2010 | 1:34 pm

    I hate to break it to you, but triathletes already have their own version of bib shorts – they are called skin suits.

    Example http://www.voler.com/ProductDetails.aspx?Item=V8350101

    Just as funny looking, less funny tan lines.

  22. Comment by Kristina | 02.18.2010 | 1:37 pm

    Philly Jen -
    Have you tried bibshorts, if you have and don’t like them, then that’s cool. I thought bibshorts may be uncomftable on my chest, but I have never had an issue (just for a reference I wear a C (I feel a little weird listing that here, but I am trying to give you a point of reference)). In fact I don’t even feel the strap part of the bibs through my sports bra at all. The material is so light it isn’t like wearing suspenders. If you haven’t tried them you should give them a shot. Although it does making using the bathroom much more difficult, but the comfort is definitely worth it for me. I never noticed how binding the waist band of regular cycling shorts were until I switched to bibs (and yes, my shorts did fit and were not too small).

  23. Comment by Kristina | 02.18.2010 | 1:41 pm

    By the way, this post was hilarious. Ever since I gave in to not wearing a jersey when it was really hot (only at the track when very few people were there) I have felt SOOO guilty about violating such a basic principle of cycling etiquette. This post made me squirm so much.

  24. Comment by Nogocyclist | 02.18.2010 | 2:12 pm

    Fatty, wear anything you want for a triathlon. Just don’t go to Bike Snob NYC’s blog site to get any ideas. At least not at the end of today’s post!!!!


  25. Comment by Greg @ Greg Rides Trails | 02.18.2010 | 2:43 pm

    Haha yes! Awesome post!

  26. Comment by Mary | 02.18.2010 | 2:47 pm

    Hehehe thanks for spreading your funny Fatty!

  27. Comment by FNEditor | 02.18.2010 | 2:52 pm

    I think its also permissable to wear just shorts if you used your jersey to stop a friends bleeding head wound because they crashed downhill while not wearing a helmet, right Kenny?

  28. Comment by Bryan | 02.18.2010 | 2:52 pm

    And here I was thinking this was going to be a post about how Assos sent you ten pairs of bibs to try out.

    Received my Fat Cyclist bibs from Twin Six yesterday. Awesome.

  29. Comment by Lin | 02.18.2010 | 2:54 pm

    As this link can attest, women should NOT wear the bibs only. Unless they choose to ride as this woman is standing, which over the long haul would be difficult and would require excellent balance.


  30. Comment by Chris B | 02.18.2010 | 3:11 pm

    Oh Fatty, question from the back row!!!
    Is it acceptable to wear a jersey underneath the bib shorts, thereby allowing their full glory to be displayed while still allowing me to crash with the extra protection the layer of nylon offers?
    You see I don’t wish to give up my right (not a privileged) to crash at any time I feel it’s appropriate.

  31. Comment by misogynist | 02.18.2010 | 3:12 pm

    I think that as a general practice, women should be required to wear bibs w/o a jersey.

  32. Comment by Clydesteve | 02.18.2010 | 3:26 pm

    I thought I had learned all I could from you and I was fixing to dump you, Fatty.

    Until I got to the part about storing chips (with or without the bag)in the front of my bib shorts.

    That type of insight keep me returning to enhance my wisdom, Captain, O’ Captain.

  33. Comment by Paulscarlett | 02.18.2010 | 3:27 pm

    Oh Fatt, you’ve done it again!
    Great post

  34. Comment by Joel P. | 02.18.2010 | 3:28 pm

    Thanks for the picture of the “crop top”. That mental picture will be sticking with me for some time.
    Joel P.

  35. Comment by Clydesteve | 02.18.2010 | 3:32 pm

    @Kristina – TMI! TMI!

  36. Comment by Turt99 | 02.18.2010 | 3:34 pm

    I’d think you’d need to be careful not to get Chamios Creme on your Chips if you put them down your shorts…

    I don’t want to know what DZ Nutz taste like ….

    HAHAH… ooh yeah I went there!

  37. Comment by Clydesteve | 02.18.2010 | 3:35 pm

    @Lin – Only women who require the enlarge link under the model’s image in the ad you linked should try this.

  38. Comment by Mandy | 02.18.2010 | 3:55 pm

    Holy crap. I am peeing my pants, this is so funny.

  39. Comment by Barb Douglas | 02.18.2010 | 4:01 pm

    Add to your “permissible to not wear a jersey rules” must be under age 50. Too many old guys think its ok to take their jersey off after they’ve finished the ride UGH.

  40. Comment by Haven (KT) | 02.18.2010 | 4:33 pm

    Nice, Fatty. Now I have the image of Stanley Tucci in a half-shirt and bibs sitting on the couch eating chips out of his bibs. Thanks.

    And Lin? That link is almost NSFW. Just sayin’.

  41. Comment by Frank | 02.18.2010 | 4:51 pm

    Since you are clearly the style guru par excellence I would expect you to enter the Ironman wearing nothing but a proper speedo. However, since WTC now requires that you cover your chest, a bra-top will be very fitting. Take a look at #11, Faris Al-Sultan, at the link below. Ignore the previous 10 since they do clearly do not understand the value of traditional dress in such an important event.


  42. Comment by Eric | 02.18.2010 | 5:11 pm

    Dear Fatty:

    First time commenter. I bought some “Fat Cyclist” Twin Six bib shorts because they look cool, I wanted to try bibs for the first time ever, and I HATE CANCER!!!

    Anyhow, my nipples really dislike how they are rubbed raw by the straps. I couldn’t return them, so I solve the problem with either tape or bandaids over the nipples (never fun after the ride :O). I don’t see ever buying bibs again.

    Any ideas for this problem? I don’t have a gut, so perhaps I need to work on developing a larger “food blister” in my abdomen to push the straps away from the nipplage?

    Is it a huge fashion faux pas to wear the straps over the shirt on the outside?

  43. Comment by the slow ironman | 02.18.2010 | 5:39 pm

    here in austin there is one male bike rider who rides in nothing but a thong – and he does not have a luxury body on display. The next step in cycling fashion for hot summers.

  44. Comment by anon | 02.18.2010 | 5:49 pm

    Eric –
    Base layer beneath bibs does away with the unpleasantness.

  45. Comment by Heidi | 02.18.2010 | 6:03 pm

    I bet in real life you’re a big-time mumbler, seeing as how firmly you’ve got your tongue lodged in a cheek. If you typed it out it would look something like this: Mmmph mmmph mmmph Twizzlers mmmph hahaha!

  46. Comment by LidsB2 | 02.18.2010 | 6:16 pm

    Red Vines rule. Twizzlers are waxy and nasty. As for the bibs, I would love them if it weren’t for those darned shoulder straps.

  47. Comment by Born 4Lycra | 02.18.2010 | 6:23 pm

    Eric try putting your bibs on back to front. Philly Jen maybe that’s the answer for you too. Jabernat I got away with wearing my bibs in the office for about 5 minutes before the police were called.
    Fatty following a big community ride which ended up at the beach I immediately hit the surf wearing just my bibs. After splashing around for a while I came back on up the beach and lasted about 5 minutes until the police were called. Wet Lycra as in absolutely drenched can be quite stretchy apparently.

  48. Comment by Dan in Sac | 02.18.2010 | 6:40 pm

    Kristina, Please post a picture of your bib advice…for the sake of science…. errr, or anatomy.

  49. Comment by Kristina | 02.18.2010 | 6:50 pm

    Picture wouldn’t be that interesting. Sports bra has really good coverage and bibs go up pretty high. It wasn’t meant to be provocative, just not so miserably hot. You should check out the picture of Faris Al-Sultan, he has way more skin showing.

  50. Comment by Monathalete | 02.18.2010 | 7:06 pm

    The very best picture on the link below is #13.


    By the way, the best reason to wear bibs (with a jersey — always with a jersey!), is that no one can do the old “pull your shorts down” joke on you.

  51. Comment by MB | 02.18.2010 | 7:23 pm

    Great post Fatty…definitely a classic!

  52. Comment by Bisso | 02.18.2010 | 7:28 pm


    Some chamois cream will do the trick too.

    and while i too advocate the overall comfort and fit of bibs, dontcha just love it when you are ready to leave the house with helmet on, glasses, and a jersey with pockets full of food/spares/whatever and then nature calls?

  53. Comment by aussie kev | 02.18.2010 | 8:25 pm

    i have ridden only wearing shoes !!!! – it was in a big group though so not to bad !!!.

    another faux pax is bib nicks over the top of a standard short sleve business shirt (that was my father we had to have words) . yes that was over the top – hideous.

  54. Comment by DrBryce | 02.18.2010 | 8:37 pm

    I once threatened to attend a church Halloween party in nothing but Bib shorts as an “All Star Wrestler” in all my Fat Cyclist glory.

    I’ve not been invited to attend any other Halloween parties!

    I love it Fatty, fantastic work, you’ve made my day full of giggles and laughs!

  55. Comment by Mary | 02.18.2010 | 10:13 pm

    I remember seeing a Tour de France rider (Indurain?) wearing nothing but bibs on one of the last legs of the Tour probably 10 years ago or more. And, he looked HOT! Anyone else see it? I’m sure it inspired some bro-mance as well.

  56. Comment by oldman | 02.19.2010 | 12:01 am

    boring crap

  57. Comment by Born 4 Lycra | 02.19.2010 | 4:11 am

    Oldman take something to read with you next time then.

    Born 4 Lycra, I hereby appoint you the Official Responder to Troll Comments for this site. – FC

  58. Comment by Matthew | 02.19.2010 | 6:15 am

    Too funny, Fatty.

    Mary, I don’t know of the pic you speak of, but my girlfriend would like to see a similar pic of Fabian Cancellara. Geesh.

  59. Comment by Tim | 02.19.2010 | 6:54 am

    Visions of IronFatty dancing around to “Sharp Dressed Man” by ZZ Top.

  60. Comment by Anne | 02.19.2010 | 7:14 am

    Hee hee. Thanks fatty for a good laugh. So funny!!!

    Bibs are a most have item as a cyclist and thanks for the tip on the chips.

  61. Comment by Razor | 02.19.2010 | 7:44 am

    Feel free to try going for a ride in just bib nicks over east – say round Kings Cross.

    Don’t try it in Western Australia or you will get full stubbies thrown at you by passing motorists – not just the empties.

  62. Comment by Greg @ Greg Rides Trails | 02.19.2010 | 7:51 am

    +1 on the Red Vines over Twizzlers

  63. Comment by MrTeamPhillips | 02.19.2010 | 7:58 am

    I have done a few mountain bike races against a guy who did the bibs/camelback thing. I tried to make sure I was always ahead of him to cut down on the streaming sweat coming off of him. Oh BTW he was one of those guys who could shave his back with a lawnmower. Not a pretty sight, no not at all.

  64. Comment by GenghisKhan | 02.19.2010 | 8:29 am

    @ Born 4 Lycra: Congrats on the promotion–you deserve it! Looks like you are movin’ on up the ranks of Fatty Corp.

  65. Comment by Conor | 02.19.2010 | 9:15 am

    I take great delight your ability to write with your tongue wedged firmly in your cheek.

  66. Comment by Bryan (not that one) | 02.19.2010 | 9:21 am

    @Philly Jen and @Kristina

    I know Assos makes women’s bib shorts where a single strap goes between them. At least that’s what I’ve been told. Ok, maybe I saw the pictures once. Or thrice…

  67. Comment by GJ Jackie | 02.19.2010 | 10:21 am

    Good review of bib shorts for men: http://www.bicycling.com/gear/topic/1,7987,s1-15-56-0,00.html

    Of course, there’s no similar review of women’s bibs. Just like when I get my cycling catalogs that have 15 pages of mens clothing and only one page for women. Hmmm.

  68. Comment by Elisabethvi | 02.19.2010 | 10:52 am

    any chance we’ll see some Fat Cyclist Womens small or medium bibs for sale anytime soon?

  69. Comment by Erik | 02.19.2010 | 11:24 am

    To my mind the rules are simple (for guys, anyway). You can wear bibs without a jersey if and only if you’re Gary Fisher. Otherwise you’ll have your bike surgically removed and be condemed to a life of swimming. You can wear non-bib shorts if… OK, I can’t think of any reason anyone would ever wear non-bib shorts. As for the luxury body – I think that’s appropriate in any triathlon, anytime. But don’t you need to cut the sleeves off too? That would look absolutely awesome on a dualie mountain bike with clip-on aero bars and slicks!

  70. Comment by tommysail | 02.19.2010 | 12:08 pm

    talented following Fatty, comments as funny as you are. if the cycle clothing people are paying attention, i would like to see a manssiere in the top of my bibs. also, what is the deal with the painted on shorts on the speed skaters tights. looks stupid.

  71. Comment by Lisa T | 02.19.2010 | 1:40 pm

    Thanks for telling the hairy dudes to forgo the shorts with no jersey. Excellent advice.

  72. Comment by BellaBike | 02.19.2010 | 2:36 pm

    This all reminds me of Nekked Frank, who rode with our local club for a few years. Nekked Frank was so named because regular, elastic-waisted bike shorts was the only article of clothing he wore while cyling. I used to ride behind him taunting him to “Take off your shorts, Frank. Why are you wearing shorts, Frank?” and then worrying a bit that he would! Ah, alas, Nekked Frank moved back to Florida and it’s boring now with everyone clothed.

    Hilarious Giordana bibs ad, @Lin, thanks for the giggle.

  73. Comment by drandersen | 02.19.2010 | 3:28 pm

    Another great look for bib shorts is when you add your arm warmers and a Mexican wrestling mask! Further to this, (I realize Fatty’s hatred for the knee warmer) I would proclaim that only wearing knee warmers and arm warmers is probably the hottest look a man can get. Period. On many occasions I have used this look to entice my beautiful wife into… well you know. It’s not because I am particularity handsome or hot, it’s simply because I can make her laugh… at me… while I wear the arm warmers/knee warmers combo.

  74. Comment by tony | 02.19.2010 | 5:11 pm

    I’m surprised no one has mentioned that bib shorts and bib knicks (not nicks) are not the same thing at all. Shorts end above the knee, knicks end below. In order of length they are: bib shorts, bib knicks, bib tights.

    (I think knicks is an abbreviation for knickerbockers – not that anyone ever uses that word any more.)

  75. Comment by Anonymous | 02.19.2010 | 6:35 pm

    I’ve been waiting for a “Fat Cyclist Fake News Story” on the lastest doping news story (hint… it involves a warrent). Is it in the works?

  76. Comment by BulkOnWheels | 02.19.2010 | 8:06 pm

    Redvines, Bibs, Boobs! All too funny!!!

  77. Comment by Sprocketboy | 02.20.2010 | 7:15 am

    dranderson: while living in Europe, it was suggested to me that the best way to deal with cyclist’s tan lines was to go to the nude beach wearing arm and leg warmers only.

  78. Comment by Trekker | 02.20.2010 | 10:02 am

    Fatty, I have been despondent ever since Bicycling magazine retired Style Man. Thanks for filling the void.

  79. Comment by Marlys | 02.20.2010 | 3:01 pm

    You are so funny! Who else could make such a commentary out of bib shorts! Whatever makes you comfortable, that is how you should ride!

  80. Comment by buckythedonkey | 02.20.2010 | 5:53 pm

    Last year on our summer holiday in Catalunya we spotted two guys wearing baggy white T-shirts were worn *under* their bib shorts. Discuss.

  81. Comment by Charlie | 02.20.2010 | 9:06 pm

    No one seems to have addressed Paul’s question regarding whether going sockless is the slippery slope to poor cycling attire. I think not. One of the joys of the summer season is slipping bare feet into an old and supremely comfortable pair of Sidi Titaniums or Dettos. Ahhhhh. This time of the year, it is wool socks and fleece-lined Vittorias.

  82. Comment by Matthew | 02.21.2010 | 3:57 am


    Baggy t-shirt underneath bib, hmmmmm. I suppose that would be the equivalent of tucking in a jersey into the waist portion of non-bib cycling shorts :) Should this be done? Not so much. Is it done? Sadly, yes.

    But whatever makes you comfy during your ride, correct?

  83. Comment by Richard | 02.22.2010 | 1:34 am

    Hi Fatty,

    Completely off topic:

    My bike was stolen last night from my house here in North Perth, Western Australia.

    Keep your eyes peeled for a 2007 Cadel Evans signed Ridley Noah.


    rmedinger – at – bigpond.com if anyone sees anything.

  84. Comment by Bob | 02.22.2010 | 10:04 am

    Whenever I see a guy with bib shorts and no jersey I always think “Village People” for some reason.


  85. Comment by Bob | 02.22.2010 | 10:08 am

    Sorry, forgot to add the chorus to my above post:

    “Macho, macho man, I want to be a macho man”

    or maybe “Nacho man” if you prefer.


  86. Comment by Soulfull Commuter | 02.23.2010 | 12:37 pm

    I like this idea of only wearing bib shorts. I am thinking of carving the callouses on my feet into cleats and using Jimmy Johnson (former Dallas Cowboy and Miami Hurricane parole officer, oops. I mean former football coach) hair spray to replace my helmet.

  87. Comment by Rica | 02.23.2010 | 6:14 pm

    First off, forget about the concept of Stanley Tucci’s image in the cut-off shirt, his kid goes to my kid’s school (public school, no less.) So, now, I may actually SEE him, in person, and try not to snicker in his face. Oy vey!

    Secondly, I have a bone to pick as a woman. I WANT bib shorts. However, since I’m somewhat stacked up top, I understand I can’t WEAR bib shorts. And there are rarely female-versions of bib shorts.

    What am I to do!

    I need the Shatner lift!

  88. Comment by Richard | 02.23.2010 | 9:53 pm

    Good news

    Cops got my bike back froma pawn shop.

    Idiot got AUD$100 for it.

    You can all stop looking.


  89. Comment by Eunan | 02.24.2010 | 12:06 pm

    Recently spied someone who i shall classify as ‘newcomer to cycling ‘wearing ‘bib nicks’ OVER cycling jersey…is this proper etiquette? or should they be scolded?

  90. Comment by Bob | 02.26.2010 | 11:48 am

    That’s the way the cool kids are wearing them now. To be REALLY cool wear them backwards.


  91. Comment by Asher | 02.27.2010 | 3:13 pm

    You know, the ‘food pouch’ bit gave me an idea.

    They do make those continuous Twizzlers/Red-Vine things now, and I’m thinking that with some combination of those, bibs, and Camelbaks, we might be able to entirely eliminate rest stops from centuries. Imagine it — just run the Twizz/Vines up through the jersey (internal snack routing for aerodynamics, of course!), hook them through the helmet harness to prevent yourself from having to stop if you lose the end, and chew-as-you-go!

    (Also, for the record, this may be the most hilarious blog on teh Intarwebz. Just sayin’.)

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