Now Open: 2016 100 Miles of Nowhere

10.3.2016 | 9:56 am

Update: I’ve updated the description so it describes the (very simple) shipping costs for both the 100MoN and jerseys, etc. Specifically shipping on everything is free in the US, and a flat $5 shipping fee outside the US. 

Hi there, and welcome to my post announcing registration for the 2016 100 Miles of Nowhere. If you already know the drill and just want to go to the registration page, click here.

And for those of you who want to know what the t-shirt looks like, here you go: 

Blue mockup

And in case you’re having a hard time reading that GPS screen, here you go: 


And here’s how adorable you’ll look wearing this t-shirt, as modeled by these slightly embarrassed-looking (but still smiling!) youngsters who have literally been backed into a corner for this photo:

IMG 8778

So, if you must, go ahead and skip on to the order page. But that would mean you’d miss my very clever movie-preview-style beginning of my registration announcement, which starts now:

2016 100 Miles of Nowhere: Registration Starts NOW

(Deep, Resonant, Menacing Voice): Now…just when you thought it was safe to stop training. The 100 Miles of Nowhere is back. And this time, it’s personal.

(Deep, Resonant, Menacing Voice, But Now With a Hint of Uncertainty): OK, actually it was already about as personal as an event could be, seeing as how most people ride it alone, in a basement or in their neighborhood. 

White mockup

(Same Voice, But Now With Renewed Confidence): But there’s no denying…that’s pretty darned personal. Because it’s a race without a place. It’s an event in which hundreds of people participate . . . all by ourselves. (Or with a friend. Or with twenty friends.)

What and When is the 100 Miles of Nowhere?

OK, enough announcer voice. Let’s talk about the event, starting with the obvious question: what is the 100 Miles of Nowhere? It’s a very strange thing where you pay $39.95 (NEW LOW PRICE! INCLUDES US SHIPPING ($5 Shipping Intl)! BUY NOW!) for the privilege of riding your rollers, trainer, or a very small course (like around the block or up and down a hill) for 100 miles. The profits from your entry go to Camp Kesem — camps all across the U.S. dedicated to giving kids of parents with cancer a week of carefree fun, at no cost to them.

I did the first 100 Miles of Nowhere back in 2008, by myself, back before I knew it would be annual at all. Now in its ninth year, hundreds of us — from all around the world — do it.

Then, people send me their race reports — some folks talking about their successes, some about their challenges. Some talking about their amazing and incredible efforts:


Others write about their simple and courageous attempts at going a distance they’ve never tried before. 

Red mockup

I love all these stories and publish as many as I can on my site.

This year, the “official” date of the race is Saturday, November 11 through Sunday, November 12. Because we’re super-flexible here at 100MoN HQ. In fact, thanks to the flexibility of the event, if that weekend doesn’t work for you, you can do it another day. And that flexibility extends to whether you ride it alone or with a group of friends. It extends to the time of day: Morning? Fine. Afternoon? Awesome. After you’ve got the kids in bed and finally have some time for yourself? Perfect.

Once in a while, I hear from people who love a different sport — swimmers and runners, mostly, though I keep hoping for a rock climber. If you want to do  a marathon on the treadmill, that would be awesome. If you’re a swimmer, swim five miles. I’m not picky.


And of course, the very best thing about the 100 Miles of Nowhere is that you are going to win your division. You just need to make sure your division is specific enough that there’s no chance anyone else is in it.

In short, the 100 Miles of Nowhere has become a community event for a great cause, even though we all do it alone.

Paradoxes are awesome.

How To Register, And What You Get 
Registering for the 2016 100 Miles of Nowhere is ridiculously easy. You just click here and select your gender (for your t-shirt sizing), your size, and what color of t-shirt you want

Yep. As you may have guessed from all these t-shirt photos, this year you get to choose what color you want. 

Grey mockup

Which means that there are a total of 78 different possible t-shirt size/color combinations this year. I recommend you get one of each.

Crazy, I know. But a bunch of you let me know that you are sick of black event t-shirts. And I didn’t really know what to get instead. So I went with…everything. Black, grey, white, blue, red, and yellow

I also listened to your feedback and am having handlebar race plates made. Why? Because I agree. The fact is, my handlebar race plates are my favorite, most meaningful kind of race souvenir. Check out what the back wall in The Hammer’s and my garage looks like:

HreFHq5RQza5u6UKUb+zxw thumb ad76

I just stand and look at those race numbers sometimes. They take me back. I don’t want to not have a race number for this year’s 100MoN to put on the wall. 

Yellow mockup

But the t-shirt and the race plate are all you get this year. No bags or food or bottles. Just a t-shirt and a race plate. 

Why? Because that’s making it possible for me to make this year really affordable. Just $39.95, and that includes shipping in the US, with only $5 shipping added outside the US

At that price, I really expect to sell through the limit of 500 entries pronto.

So I wouldn’t dilly-dally if I were you. 

Good luck, and let me know in the comments when you’ve registered! 

Bonus End-of-Season, Pre-Christmas Fat Cyclist Gear Sale

While I’ve got you putting the 100MoN registration in your cart, allow me to tempt you with a nice little upsell: All FatCyclist gear is deeply discounted. 

And just like the 100MoN registration, shipping is now free in the US, with international shipping only $5

These are, quite simply, the best-made and best-looking jerseys I have ever had. I mean, look:

Fat Cyclist Black Gray Jersey

And look at this, too:

Fat Cyclist Blue Wns Jersey

These are great jerseys, at the best price I will ever sell them at. And shipping’s a bargain. I recommend you support your friendly neighborhood Fatty (me) by picking one up today, while you make your 100MoN order


  1. Comment by Chase | 10.3.2016 | 10:12 am

    First of all, hurray! I’m excited to do this again, and love the options of colors! Out of personal curiosity, and slight knowledge of your penchant for such things, will you be collecting data on T-shirt color selection?

    Also, “It’s a very strange thing where you pay $39.95 (NEW LOW PRICE! INCLUDES SHIPPING! BUY NOW!)” – I paid $5 skipping for $44.95 total. I don’t mind… If that’s an error just have them send the extra $5 on to camp Kesem as well. Thought I’d let you know though.

    Thanks again for another exciting event!

  2. Comment by Keith Craig | 10.3.2016 | 10:14 am

    Thanks, Fatty! I was worried there might not be a 100MON in 2016. T-Shirt + race plate is perfect. You should add a link for people who would like to donate some of what we saved vs. previous entry fees.

  3. Comment by Bill H-D | 10.3.2016 | 10:15 am

    I’m in! Went with the red shirt. Now to decide on this year’s course…

  4. Comment by KenKoz | 10.3.2016 | 10:17 am

    I’m in. Also had to pay shipping, but no biggie.

  5. Comment by did | 10.3.2016 | 10:25 am

    I’m thinkin’ grocery store parking lot – at night!

  6. Comment by BostonCarlos | 10.3.2016 | 10:37 am

    JeffD… let’s do this together this year… what kind of course should we do? Actually complete 100km of the Western Greenway (I bailed last year at 50km)? 100mi of the minuteman bike path? something else?

  7. Comment by AKChick | 10.3.2016 | 10:38 am

    I’m in!

    I have to admit with all the color choices, I picked…gray for the shirt. The blue was super tempting but I know me, and I don’t think I’d wear that color in a t-shirt. Thanks for offering color choices!

    Also thank you for the discounted price. I wasn’t going to be able to do it this year, but I can at this price! (I also paid shipping and also no biggie – $5 is CHEAP!)

  8. Comment by RichardinCalgary | 10.3.2016 | 10:46 am

    I’m in

  9. Comment by Matt Boulanger | 10.3.2016 | 10:47 am

    I’m in. May ride a short outdoor loop. May use my sister and brother in-law’s spinning studio if we get a group. May use it as an opportunity to demo the goldsprints gear at one of our 2017 race venues.

  10. Comment by Madcityspecv | 10.3.2016 | 10:52 am

    In again this year. we’ve moved, so i can no longer run the Circle Park 500, so i’m still mulling over what my route will be. perhaps a shorter than 100 mile ride, but while towing 15 pounds of kids behind my bright orange Fatbike and its 5″ tires? still need a suitably ridiculous route for it. regardless, i’m in again, and excited to add to my race number collection!

  11. Comment by LKB3 | 10.3.2016 | 10:54 am

    is this a typo?

    “Men’s bibs are now $84.95 (were $84.95)”

    That is a typo; thanks for catching it! Fixed now. They’re $84.95, on sale from old price of $109.95. – FC

  12. Comment by Scott | 10.3.2016 | 10:55 am

    I’m in. All the color choices caused confusion so I went black. Race plate – awesome.
    PNW in November – I may end up using my trainer, unless I can find a day where I want to be wet for six hours.

  13. Comment by Christina | 10.3.2016 | 11:05 am

    To answer your previous question, I went with yellow. This was an obvious choice, since I will conquer the day and Phil and Paul will announce me as the winner of the maillot jaune.

    This is very, very important for me, since I’m usually the lanterne rouge.

    I’m in!

  14. Comment by ClydeinKS | 10.3.2016 | 11:30 am

    In once again! For a first (sadly) this year’s 100MoN will be my first ride of the year and likely need broken up between my family and boys’ events. Sounds eerily similar to a previous year I podiumed!
    P.S. love the pricepoint with tshirt and continued race plate.

  15. Comment by Jae | 10.3.2016 | 11:32 am

    Just signed up. I’m a first time participant and this will be my first century. Looking forward to the challenge of riding 143 laps around 0.7 mile loop trail.

    [date correction: Nov 12(Sat) - Nov 13(Sun)]

  16. Comment by Fred | 10.3.2016 | 11:41 am

    After saying, “I’ll never do that again!” (100 MoN Singlespeed CycleOps division Champion – 2014), I’m coming back for 100 MoN v.4.0 in a division to be named later.

  17. Comment by Scott R | 10.3.2016 | 11:47 am

    Man, was going to go with a black shirt until the lanterne rouge got mentioned above!

    I assume sizing is consistent with previous Fatty DNA T’s?

    That’s right. And I think I’ll get myself a red one, too! I love the lanterne rouge allusion. – FC

  18. Comment by Eric Burgeson | 10.3.2016 | 12:32 pm

    Oh happy day, oh happy day, happy as can be
    I registered for that whole ride, oh my gosh what have I done, every year it’s the same thing, every darn year, I get all excited, and then I suffer, i just suffer. It always hurts, because I’m always in worse shape than the ride requires. I always end up riding in my garage, no matter what I do, and it always hurts. What have I done?!

  19. Comment by PNP | 10.3.2016 | 12:33 pm

    I’m in! Good thing my neighbors already think I’m a bit off kilter. I’ll be happy to confirm it for them.

  20. Comment by Don | 10.3.2016 | 12:48 pm

    Done, I’m signed up and plan to bring more cyclists into the 100MON fold. Can I drop my celebrity bloggers friend’s name in order up the participants list?

    Heck yeah. – FC

  21. Comment by Brian in VA | 10.3.2016 | 1:43 pm

    Finally signed up for my first 100 MoN! I’m very excited and looking forward to getting my first podium, too!

    Thanks Fatty!

  22. Comment by Lee Donnahoo | 10.3.2016 | 2:13 pm

    I’m in (again)! Can’t wait to go no where (again)! Hopefully the Marymoor velodrome will be dry so I can ride in 400 oblong circles.

  23. Comment by Corrine | 10.3.2016 | 2:22 pm

    I’m in. Almost forgot to sign up as it was so busy at work. Went with blue T shirt. Can’t wait. I’m going to have a “bear” of a ride this year. That’s a hint about my ride. There may be another video again this year if I can get my act together. Can’t wait for 100MoN reports. They are my favorite.

  24. Comment by Tim | 10.3.2016 | 3:33 pm

    Shipping appears to be fixed. $0.00 Flat rate. I made an inquiry into the St. Louis velodrome to see if that is a possibility.

  25. Comment by Jimbo/Rumpled | 10.3.2016 | 3:58 pm

    I’m in. Went grey, though I did kinda like the blue.
    Trying to get my friends to officially register.

  26. Comment by leroy | 10.3.2016 | 4:05 pm

    I’m in.

    My dog suggested a red T-Shirt to match my eyes, which is weird because my eyes are brown.

    So I went with blue. It didn’t seem like such a non sequitur in the moment.

    Unsolicited Plug Alert: Also got striped socks to go with FC kit because last year’s 100 MON socks are really comfy.

    My dog reminds me I owe you his race report about my Lantern Rouge 2015 100 MON. He says it involves T-shirts, fashion, and rules.

    I’m not sure what he’s talking about — or how it is that I owe you his report — but I guess I’ll find out.


    He says his karaoke and book club schedule has been brutal lately.

  27. Comment by Jim Tolar | 10.3.2016 | 4:11 pm


    I’m in. This year’s 100MtN (Dobson Ranch Edition) will be held Saturday, October 15. I’ll post a write-up after the event, as usual. As always, if you or any of the FattyFamily find themselves in the area on the day of, stop by for a brat on us.


  28. Comment by Matt | 10.3.2016 | 5:47 pm

    Ok, so it looks like I’m in! I went with the black t-shirt though was sorely tempted by a red one, and I finally crumbled to your excellent nudging and bought the fatty-suit for the ride – a pleasure to help support the site.

    I’m pretty sure that running Dublin Marathon two weeks earlier, then immediately going on holiday for a week to drink beer while lying on the beach in Lanzarote will be the ideal training for my first attempt at a century on the bike! Or indeed a half century. Or, in fact, my first attempt at anything over roughly 1/3 of a century. Oh dear, what have I done?

    Still, I’ve managed to find a not quite exactly 1 mile loop which alongside being not desperately hilly and reasonably traffic free, also has the triple benefit of

    1) featuring a bridge to shelter under like a soggy bike-troll should the British weather live down to expectations,
    2) having a fish & chip shop situated on it for refuelling mid-way (who am I kidding? I’ll probably be in there every 20 laps!)
    and 3) being close enough to home that I can call the wife to bring emergency cake at a moment’s notice.

    Having put up with my marathon taper crazies twice twice already this year, I am sure she’s going to be delighted to know I’m planning on spending a day cycling in circles…

  29. Comment by Fred | 10.3.2016 | 6:45 pm

    I did a little recon ride of my likely course this evening.
    It will be ~150 laps with ~300 U-turns.
    I did 5 miles of recon, and I didn’t go crazy. I was actually enjoying a little bit.
    Just need to get my rest stop staffing and SAG Wagon driver(s) worked out, and I’ll be ready.

    I had never ridden this road before, but it appears perfect for the event. There are already 3 red lines painted on the road for intermediate Sprint Points, and there are a couple of climbs for me to accumulate K.O.M. Points. I’m predicting that I will absolutely dominate my division.

    One U-turn is flat and tight to test the bike handling skills, and the other is wider and banked to help conserve momentum. So much variety in so little space.

    And the name of the road (which will remain a secret until after the event) is so very appropriate for the 100 MoN.

    Target time = 6:40:00.

  30. Comment by Jared13 | 10.3.2016 | 7:36 pm

    In 2014 I was the “recovering from 8 broken bones” category champion and I’m going for a repeat this year!


    Well, repeating as champion but I’m hoping I get in a different category!

    Yeah, I think the “Completely healed, no longer busted at ALL” category should be the one you strive for this year. – FC

  31. Comment by joliver3 | 10.3.2016 | 7:56 pm

    I’m in for my 3rd ride in a row! Got my route selected already, need to come up with a division to guarantee my victory!

  32. Comment by Jerry Pringle | 10.3.2016 | 8:00 pm

    I’m in! So excited to participate again! I’m scouting a 2 mile loop, 1 mile mostly uphill, then coast back down. 50 laps ought to do it!

  33. Comment by Jerry Pringle | 10.3.2016 | 8:11 pm

    I’m in! So excited to participate again! I’m scouting a 2 mile loop, 1 mile mostly uphill, then coast back down. 50 laps ought to do it! Certain to win left-handed 2x cancer surviving engineer from Simpsonville SC division again!

    For some reason, the uphill parts always seem to last longer than the downhill parts. Weird. – FC

  34. Comment by Gary C. | 10.3.2016 | 9:02 pm

    1st ride today in the DNA Cycling bib shorts….they are fantastic! Just as you described. Upon arriving home from the ride, i was compelled to order another pair. Thanks!

    Awesome – so glad they’re a hit! – FC

  35. Comment by Brian | 10.3.2016 | 10:30 pm


    Any chance you (or anyone else for that matter) could help me with the DNA kit sizing?

    I’m 6′1″ and weight 175. I wear a size Large in most Euro kits, and Mediums in some Domestic brands. I like my jersey’s tight and prefer more of a race cut. Based on your experience, do you think a size M jersey would work? Then maybe a Large in the bibs?


    That sounds about right to me. I’m 5′7″ and the Medium fits me until I get heavier than 165. If you’re half a foot taller and only 10 pounds heavier, a medium jersey ought to fit you just fine. Lg shorts should work as well. – FC

  36. Comment by Ingrid | 10.4.2016 | 5:08 am

    Yes! Registered and looking forward to wear my one-shade-of-grey shirt to win the Dutch-walk-instead-of-cycle-around-the-bush division of 42K steps. Probably dog-assisted.

  37. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.4.2016 | 6:12 am

    I’m in. Route selected, I think. Race day hasn’t been dialed in. Maybe I’ll actually write something up this year. Really, though. My wife’s the writer in the family. Maybe I can get her to do it while I’m riding and she can accurately predict the winner of the race!

  38. Comment by Tim | 10.4.2016 | 6:24 am

    @Brian – On DNA Cycling jersey size, I am 6′2″, 210lbs and I needed a 2XL. I purchased an XL and it was too tight. Even if I liked it tight, it was simply too small in the chest, back and arms. Not sure if that helps or not, but just some larger guy input.

  39. Comment by oreneta | 10.4.2016 | 8:34 am

    Signed up, and you’ve got a rock climber. Ask, Fatty, and you shall receive…I’ve done one other 100 miles of nowhere (back in 2012, when I did a long walk with my dog Chuck). This time Chuck won’t be along…he’s not much of a climber. Figuring I’ll call it 100 routes to nowhere – by a middle aged Canadian woman in Spain. Figure that’s a category few will compete it!

    Looking forward to it…..not sure the photography will be as amazing.

    I’VE FINALLY GOT A ROCK CLIMBER! Good luck in your #100RoN. You’d better find someone to be your photographer; we’re gonna want great pics/video with this race report. – FC

  40. Comment by esteefatty | 10.4.2016 | 9:48 am

    Weir hill walk again 14% grade. Best wishes to the Nelsons and all you 100M of Nowhere buddies.

  41. Comment by rb | 10.4.2016 | 9:59 am

    I’m in for Blue!

    Last year I had a very ambitious and complex plan. The plan is a work of art. The election of the plan failed in spectacular fashion. Let’s call it a DNS.

    Perhaps I should write up the “100 lines of unexecuted Project Plan”. This year I will do 100 something, and may even tell people about it.

    The bib shorts are amazing. I have the race shorts and the Asolo shorts. Considering getting more of each, and throwing away all my other shorts.

  42. Comment by Chris | 10.4.2016 | 10:36 am

    I’m in again. May do it a week early to guarantee a win in my division (to be named later).

  43. Comment by Fredbob711 | 10.4.2016 | 12:11 pm

    Registered with the blue shirt, and I e-mailed the track official with the St. Louis Velodrome and she said it’s perfectly ok to do it there, but she said I probably want to do a few laps of the track beforehand before committing to a long distance ride on it. Her exact words were ‘it has the nickname Mr. Bumpyface for a reason’.
    My wife registered too though, not sure what her plan is for completing this is.

  44. Comment by Jeff Dieffenbach | 10.4.2016 | 12:33 pm

    @Fredbob711, if you can fit 28mm tires or even larger, and run them at relatively low PSI (50-70, perhaps), you should get a smoother ride AND faster speed. There’s a fair amount of research backing this up.

    That said, it’s quite possible that the research did not include a case for “Mr. Bumpyface.”

    Post on very wide tires and road riding coming very soon, btw. – FC

  45. Comment by Joe | 10.4.2016 | 3:27 pm

    Figures the first time I see you mention you want a climber to do this is the year I’m out of commission with a shoulder injury from bouldering. It looks like oreneta has you covered for this year. I’ll climb it for you next year!

  46. Comment by Mark | 10.4.2016 | 6:29 pm

    Yellow shirt for a great cause.

  47. Comment by Marty Bunge | 10.4.2016 | 9:53 pm

    I’m in! Don’t know what I’ll do for sure, but right now I’m leaning toward finding a bean field outside of town that’s been harvested and riding my fat bike in circles. What else says nowhere than a route with no roads? I thought using a fat bike seems appropriate.

  48. Comment by Alan S | 10.4.2016 | 10:56 pm

    I’m in. For my mom, my mother-in-law, and my friend Kristen.

    [Expletive Deleted] cancer.

  49. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.5.2016 | 6:59 am

    Fatty, Question about the DNA bibs. I’ve got a set from last year. I ordered small – my normal size (5′6″ – 130). The ends of the legs are too big! They actually are loose around my ‘not FatCyclist’ quads. Wondering if anyone of a similar non-impressive quad size has had the same experience?

    That was actually an issue I brought up with DNA when talking about the bibs for this year.. They agreed that this could and should be corrected, but that it had more to do with the length of the bibs being too long — they go below where the quad begins to taper in. This year, the bibs are a little shorter (2cm I believe), and I have not noticed this issue happening. Thanks for asking! – FC

  50. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.5.2016 | 8:55 am

    Dude! Did you just tell me to buy another set of bibs?


  51. Comment by Dave T | 10.5.2016 | 1:05 pm

    I signed us up for the tandem trike family division. Anyone interested in joining us for a very flat route in south San Jose? Food, beer and snarky comments provided.

  52. Comment by khg | 10.5.2016 | 1:37 pm

    Ummm… On my calendar the 11th of November is a Friday? And then the 12th is a Saturday (surprising!)… It would be appropriate to plan a ride to nowhere on a non-existent date–but should one want to do one of the official dates, are we aiming for 11th and 12th, or Saturday and Sunday?

  53. Comment by Carl Frost | 10.5.2016 | 5:25 pm

    Flip flopped between gray and red, but ended up going with gray!

  54. Comment by Katalina | 11.1.2016 | 5:59 pm

    I’m all registered and ready to ride the 100 MON. Course is all mapped out and will be using 100 miles of bike paths that circle around Tucson, Arizona.


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