Take My Dreamy Dream Bike Survey

10.12.2016 | 2:36 pm

I’m still away from home, working a lot of hours…and riding very little. (OK, none.)

For some reason, when I can’t ride much, I tend to think about riding even more. And — and this is the part The Hammer needs to worry about — I start thinking about my dream bike more often. I ask myself, “If I could have any bike at all, what would it be?” 

Or sometimes I start thinking about some kind of riding I would like to try — bikepacking or track racing — and my dream bike dreaming will run down that path.

I can’t be the only one who dreams about dream bikes. Can I? 

Well, I put together this little survey here to find out. Take a couple minutes to answer it if you would be so kind (it really shouldn’t take you more than a couple minutes).

There’s no trickery here — I’m not collecting any info about you, much less any personal info. In other words, you’re not going to get a call from a bike company if you happen to answer certain questions in certain ways.

Next week, once I get back, I’ll share the interesting bits of how you answer.

OK, enough caveating and preambling. Get started!


  1. Comment by Benfu | 10.12.2016 | 3:31 pm

    Ah, now you have me daydreaming again. It’s going to be snowing here soon so that beautiful fat bike is going to be dreamy.

  2. Comment by mccarthi | 10.12.2016 | 3:35 pm

    I have my dream bike – an option that is not covered by the survey !

    Brian Rourke 953 OS road bike with full manual shimano 9000 and Zipp 202 wheels. Haven’t thought about buying another bike since building this one up, so it must therefore fulfil the role of dream bike.

  3. Comment by Mark in Bremerton | 10.12.2016 | 3:52 pm

    We had an amazing summer riding our tandem – some epic rides and travels.

    Now we want a better tandem than the entry level bike we bought (we already upgraded the gruppo). Saw some really dreamy, and fast, rides at the Tandem Rally in Oregon.

  4. Comment by wharton_crew | 10.12.2016 | 5:09 pm

    I love the fact that you have an option for “I can’t explain it, I’m just drawn to it”. This reminds me of my first dream bike – a Bianchi Infinito in blue and white. Not the top brand, not even the top-end of the brand itself, but for some reason I fell in love with the bike. Even now that I have a better bike (Trek Madone), I’d still probably buy that Bianchi if I had a bunch of cash.

    Weird…I know.

  5. Comment by cyclingjimbo | 10.12.2016 | 6:41 pm

    My dream bike showed up as a result of an email from Fatty saying “Congratulations, you’ve won ….”

    After 3 years it is still my dream bike, and I ride it every chance I get. I cannot think of any way to improve on this marvelous riding machine. It is a way better bike than I am a rider, and anything out there that is even better would be wasted on me.

  6. Comment by Joe Lee | 10.12.2016 | 6:43 pm

    I went with an MTB but it was a TOUGH choice … I mean there’s a dream fatbike and a dream road bike and then just stunning bikes that are dreamy … Bianchi SuperLeggera anyone?

  7. Comment by Anonymous | 10.12.2016 | 7:00 pm

    Mark in Bremerton I captain both a custom Calfee Carbon and a custom Seven Ti Evergreen. Come to the Bay Area and we’ll go down to the Calfee Factory. Go East to Boston and Carlos would probably do the same.

    @Fatty if you’re in the Bay Area give me a call. I’ll get you a bike and take you night riding.

  8. Comment by davidh-marin,ca | 10.12.2016 | 7:01 pm

    Mark and Fatty: I assume you knew who that was above

  9. Comment by davidh-marin,ca | 10.12.2016 | 7:04 pm

    Elden: why does this survey not have the ability to check all of above

    You mean for the “What kind of bike are you dreaming about” question, right? In retrospect, I guess it would have made sense to make that a checkbox answer so people could choose more than one option. I should also have included CX and gravel bike / adventure bike. I’m going to blame these oversights and errors on my quality assurance team, which has been doing a pretty terrible job, frankly, for the past twelveish years. I don’t even know why I keep them around. – FC

  10. Comment by miles archer | 10.12.2016 | 8:22 pm

    I was wondering how he was supposed to get in touch with anonymous.

  11. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.13.2016 | 5:14 am

    Curse you, Fatty, for not setting the age ranges more compassionately. I was looking for the 30-51 range. But, No! You have to give me 50-59? D’oh!

    And now I’m thinking about my dream bike again…

  12. Comment by Jon | 10.13.2016 | 6:15 am

    There is a theory which states that if ever anyone does perfectly obtain their perfect bike, the Universe will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

    There is another theory mentioned, which states that this has already happened.

    I’m going to grab my towel now…

  13. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.13.2016 | 6:36 am

    @Friends of Fatty – NY State – Albany area edition

    I was crossing Old State Rd in Guilderland, NY yesterday (10/12) around 545PM when a FOF rocking full FC kit went riding by me and my son. Who are you and what are you planning to do for the 100MoN?

    t o m m y s m o (at) y a h o o (dot) c o m

  14. Comment by Brian Ogilvie | 10.13.2016 | 6:54 am

    @mccarthi: “I have my dream bike – an option that is not covered by the survey !”

    That was my original thought. But then it struck me: any bike that I already own is, by definition, not my *dream* bike. A dream bike is a bike that you (the dreamer) don’t already own.

    My current favorite bike is a Boulder All Road with a semi-custom lugged frame, built up myself (except for pressing the headset, which Mike Kone’s shop did) with components I chose myself. My dream bike would be very similar, except perhaps a full custom low-trail 650B bike with standard size tubing. It would look nicer than the Boulder—but the Boulder looks very nice as it is, and performs well. So I don’t dream about a full custom very often.

    I would agree with you. My current geared hardtail MTB is the best hardtail I could want. But it’s mine, so I don’t dream about it (though sometimes I do just stare at it). I use it. A dream bike (in my definition) is one you don’t have, as part of the definition of “dream.” So that’s how I wrote the survey. However, if some readers (cyclingjimbo, mccarthi) feel their current bikes ARE their dream bikes, who am I to argue? – FC

  15. Comment by Christina | 10.13.2016 | 8:07 am

    I ride one bike everyday and another bike some days and my other bike for many days and long distances, but not often enough.

    You know what I liked about this survey? It was just dreamy. It wasn’t “Donate this much to win this bike!” I was just able to wallow around in the pool of bike porn in my mind.


    Dream bike.


  16. Comment by Jeff Dieffenbach | 10.13.2016 | 8:21 am

    @Christina, “pool of bike porn in my mind” is my new favorite phrase of 2016!

  17. Comment by Don | 10.13.2016 | 9:10 am

    @Jeff Dieffenbach, yes, currently wallowing around in the pool myself.

  18. Comment by Christina | 10.13.2016 | 9:17 am

    Thank you, thank you.

  19. Comment by Madcityspecv | 10.13.2016 | 9:23 am

    i’m thinking a Dream bike inspired Free-Verse Friday is in order. nothing better than an ode to your dreams!

  20. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.13.2016 | 9:38 am

    @Madcitycpecv – this blog could become PG-13 in no time!

  21. Comment by AKChick | 10.13.2016 | 10:17 am

    I just read through the comments because I was going to say I already own my dream bike when someone mentioned that you can’t own your dream bike…while I somewhat disagree, it did lead me to think that there is another dream bike I’d like – an all carbon fat tire bike. I already own my dream road bike. I absolutely LOVE that bike. The ride is like nothing else I’ve ever ridden. But for the carbon fat tire bike, that truly is a dream bike so I will go back and fill out the survey. :)

  22. Comment by Skye | 10.13.2016 | 1:59 pm

    My dream bike is cheap, fits itself to me every time I get on it so I don’t ever have to adjust anything (and then readjust, and adjust again), cheers me on while I chop firewood (all the other bikes already do this as well, due to their view of the wood pile when parked in the shed) but New Dreamy Bike will be extra special because it also washes dishes and makes a lunch for me everyday.

    I’m pretty sure this is the bike that Jon’s theory is talking about….

  23. Comment by Skye | 10.13.2016 | 2:08 pm

    And not ‘makes lunch’ like the bike that Fatty once test drove and used as noodle strainer because it was made of swiss cheese metal. I would link to the post so you’d remember that it was real and I’m not crazy, but would you believe that ’swiss cheese metal’ isn’t coming up with any hits?

  24. Comment by Jeff Dieffenbach | 10.13.2016 | 2:22 pm

    Search Google using “fat cyclist cheese grater”–I think you’ll find the droids you’re looking for.

  25. Comment by Tim | 10.13.2016 | 2:36 pm

    Just cause we are dreaming…..You know when you are having that great ride and you come to a stop sign in some lovely spot and are distracted for some reason and just forget you clipped in and “doh”, over you go. Or when you are riding up a trail and it becomes steep and filled with gravel and though still pedaling the forward momentum goes to zero and before you can get that foot out, “doh” over you go. That new BMW motorcycle that was announced yesterday has gyros so it never falls over. That would be a sweet option in a bike, as long as it does not add any weight. But that is okay, because this is a dream.

  26. Comment by Ted Shannon | 10.13.2016 | 4:12 pm

    I just got back from a ride on my recently realized dream bike. It’s a MOOTS Frosthammer decked out with 29er + wheels. I sat down to continue researching my as yet unrealized dream bike, came across your survey and am happy to participate. A retirement gift to myself!!!

  27. Comment by Doug (the releaser of poisonous gasses) | 10.13.2016 | 5:15 pm

    Hey is this one of polls that I can keep entering to influence the statistics?

  28. Comment by Doug ( Way Upstate NY) | 10.13.2016 | 5:17 pm

    I’m retiring the releaser of poisonous gasses thing :)

  29. Comment by Jim | 10.13.2016 | 6:04 pm

    Brakes and drivetrain that never squeak, need servicing, or wear out would be really all I could ask for.

  30. Comment by Shugg McGraw | 10.14.2016 | 6:11 am

    It’s not about the bike. Even liars tell the truth sometimes.

  31. Comment by Tom in Albany | 10.14.2016 | 8:40 am

    Thanks, Doug (Way Up NY). I’m stuffing the box as well!

  32. Comment by David Harman | 10.14.2016 | 2:38 pm

    I should be getting mine in… oh… 18 months or so. 40h bday present. planning in advance. Custom built Hans Schneider lugged steel (probably Columbus tubing) for my weird 6ft 1in frame with 29 inch legs. Glossy racing orange with flat black old school rings and accents. Can’t afford my dream components right away, but the frames the main thing. So it’ll start with 105s and some midrange mavic or Reynolds wheels, but someday, mechanical dura ace and some Church aero carbon clinchers.

  33. Comment by Skye | 10.14.2016 | 4:38 pm

    @Jeff, I’m not crazy, thanks!


  34. Comment by Dizzy | 10.15.2016 | 4:15 am

    Relating to Shugg’s suggestion…my dreamy bike isn’t just standing there. We’re riding on perfectly paved roads w/wide, sweeping vistas. Bikes have the right of way and cell phones don’t work in cars/trucks. It’s never cold. It never snows or rains. There are bike shops, coffee shops and microbreweries every 20 miles or so. And I don’t have to work any more so there’s lots of time to ride…..pop!

    Ah…dreamy bike….

  35. Comment by Marilyn Stoner | 10.15.2016 | 5:40 am

    I would love to ride and not feel feel the aches and pains of aging. I’d like to feel in my body the way I feel in my heart and minds fully alive. Life is great on a bike! Any bike!

  36. Comment by MikeL | 10.15.2016 | 6:30 pm

    @Skye and @Jeff: There is one of those bikes available in the Robin Williams bike auction offerings. Here is your chance.

  37. Comment by AC | 11.1.2016 | 4:30 pm

    It’s disappointing to even see ebikes included in this survey.

    You’ll be happy to know that only 0.6% of respondents answered “e-bike,” then. – FC


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