The Best Part of the Show Happens Before the Show

09.22.2008 | 6:02 pm

Last night, Kenny — whom I have hired as my photographer, because as my Working Press badge makes clear, I am the publisher of FATCYCLIST.COM, as well as a freelancer for — and I started our voyage to Las Vegas, where we very soon begin our coverage of InterBike 2009, if only I can get Kenny to stop drinking and lounging at the pool.

Anyway, we only got as far as St. George last night anyway, because we had business to conduct there.

Specifically, we wanted to ride the Green Valley Loop and the Zen trail this morning. And I have to say, having never ridden either of these trails before, that after riding them this morning I was giving serious consideration to maybe pushing off my InterBike attendance by an extra day, in order to get some more trail time in.

Green Valley Loop
Imagine a rollercoaster made out of baked desert clay. That’s the Green Valley Loop. You climb for a while, and then just let loose, following the humpty-bumpty-ziggy-zaggy trail to the bottom.

I’m too far away for you to tell, but — trust me — I’ve got a big ol’ happy face on here.


This ride is perfect for a singlespeed and rigid fork, by the way.

Oh, and I got a cool action sequence of Kenny dropping down what in reality looks like a freakishly steep wall and here looks like it’s barely downhill at all.





And here’s Kenny, contemplating his mortality at the edge of a certain-death cliff:


And all of this leads up to the question: if I hired Kenny to be the photographer for this boondoggle, how come I’m the one taking all the pictures? (Answer: because I know who my readers would rather have photos of.)

Confession of Apprehension
After the ride, we finished the drive to Las Vegas. As we got close, my nervousness grew (and it hasn’t really gone away). You see, while I’m perfectly happy to ham it up with a small group of friends — or on my blog, which feels like a small group of friends — I do not like big cities, or convention centers, or crowds of any sort. I don’t go to big parties. I don’t hang out at clubs. I don’t break into sweats, panic, and bolt for the door; I just prefer quieter places, where I have a better chance of being the center of attention.

Between you and me, I’m a little worried that this bike-centric trade show thing is not going to be my kind of thing.

Tomorrow Kenny and I are headed for the Outdoor Expo part of the show, and I am looking forward to that, because I am assured I will get to try out a whole buncha bikes. I expect to behave much like a kid in a candy store, where all the candy is really, really expensive.

And I’ll be wearing a messenger bag, stuffed full of Fat Cyclist t-shirts, which I have decided make a fantastic business card.


  1. Comment by Bob | 09.22.2008 | 6:19 pm

    I was reading your description of the Green Valley loop, when the thought occurred to me, “Green Valley… Green Valley… Hey! I’ve ridden that!” As a desert ride, it was passable. You made the right call in not staying another day for those St. George double-tracks. Go hang out with the cool people playing the slots.

  2. Comment by MikeonHisBike | 09.22.2008 | 6:20 pm

    Don’t worry, you’re going to tear em up Fatty.


  3. Comment by kellene | 09.22.2008 | 6:34 pm

    Have a great week on your “business” trip! Bring home lots of prizes for the kiddos!
    See you soon.

  4. Comment by pipebaum | 09.22.2008 | 6:57 pm

    If you need to get out, Red Rocks has a great road loop.

  5. Comment by KanyonKris | 09.22.2008 | 6:59 pm

    Zen is fantastic – I rode it last year. And Green Valley Loop (specifically the Bear Claw Poppy section) is just plain fun – like a roller coaster on a bike.

    Have a good time at the show! And try that Poca-hotness line on the booth babes – they’ll love it.

  6. Comment by Di | 09.22.2008 | 7:49 pm

    I need to sit on the edge of a cliff like Kenny. I hear it helps with that fear of heights thing. Such a weird issue for a mountain biker to have!

  7. Comment by Ann | 09.22.2008 | 7:57 pm

    NOW I remember why I come here every day. It’s the combination of absolute lack of self awareness and abandon in grown men, coupled with an elegant ability to articulate the experience. It’s the writing!

  8. Comment by Alexia | 09.22.2008 | 8:01 pm

    You’ll do great!

  9. Comment by Don | 09.22.2008 | 8:29 pm

    Man, I really need to get out to the southwest to ride… Anyway, I am jealous. If you remember my post last year, I was trying to start a bike shop just in time to be able to get the papers in line to be eligible to go to interbike this year… yeah, didn’t happen. With that in mind, I need a favor. Have fun for me, OK? OH! And if you see any of the Spin Bike Shop guys hanging around in their team shirts, tell them Don says “hi”, mm-kay? Thanks Fatty! Have fun!

    Oh, and Susan… (still) WIN!!

  10. Comment by Leon | 09.22.2008 | 8:32 pm

    I’m sure you’ll do just fine.
    btw, are you planning in bringing home one of those expensive candies you mentioned?
    the shirt-as-business-card idea is an excellent marketing tool

    win Susan

  11. Pingback by » Interbike Outdoor Demo 2008: Day One | 09.22.2008 | 8:59 pm

    [...] to come tomorrow. Fatty will be at the Outdoor Demo, maybe I can score a shirt. « Wild [...]

  12. Comment by Kristen | 09.22.2008 | 9:10 pm

    I love the ‘wall’ Kenny rode down! We’ve got one like that on our local trail.

    You’ll do great this week and I can’t wait to hear/see more!!

  13. Comment by Big Mike In Oz | 09.22.2008 | 10:07 pm

    I’d suggest blowing off the whole event in favour of saddle time. You’ve already done enough to make the trip deductible.

  14. Comment by randall | 09.22.2008 | 10:54 pm

    I didn’t catch your name. Do you have a business card I can have??

  15. Pingback by The Best Part of the Show Happens Before the Show | Randomblog blog | 09.23.2008 | 1:00 am

    [...] The Best Part of the Show Happens Before the Show Posted by admin on September 23, 2008 random Last night, Kenny — whom I have hired as my photographer, because as my Working Press badge makes clear, I am the publisher of FATCYCLIST.COM, as well as a freelancer for — and I started our voyage to Las Vegas, where we very soon begin our coverage of InterBike 2009, if only I can get Kenny to stop drinking and loungin…More… [...]

  16. Comment by Mike Roadie | 09.23.2008 | 4:31 am

    Be in it, enjoy it, live it—and you will have a great time. Listen, you’re doing it for all of us who can’t be there.
    Please spend at least a little time checking out the road toys, OK????


  17. Comment by fuzzy | 09.23.2008 | 5:12 am

    Fatty- you are the centre of attention,. didn’t you know the only reason InterBike 2009 is so well subscribed is that the world has heard you will be there!

    Have fun, dribble lots over to bike porn and make sure you leave your credit cards in the hotel safe!

    Win Susan!

    Luv n stuff
    Fuzzy from the UK

  18. Comment by UncleFred | 09.23.2008 | 7:14 am

    Hey Fatty if you have time, go to Mcghies Bike shop and get a Red Rock Canyon Trail Guide, there’s some pretty good Single up in them there hills.

  19. Comment by eclaire | 09.23.2008 | 7:45 am

    Hiya Fatty: My husband Clay is working at the BMC booth at outdoor demo. Make sure to drop by and test ride some bikes. (he’d look good in a fat cyclist t-shirt methinks) When I’m at the computer, chortling and guffawing, he knows I’m reading your blog. But he doesn’t read you himself!?!! (0kay, so he ain’t perfect) Maybe some face time with THE ACTUAL FAT CYCLIST HIMSELF would knock his socks off! Though if that happens, stand back, his feet sometimes (read always) smell just a bit. Wish I was there!

    WIN Susan!

  20. Comment by Fat Guy | 09.23.2008 | 7:52 am

    belt drive belt drive belt drive

  21. Comment by Flatman | 09.23.2008 | 8:19 am

    Hey…I need one of those business cards! :)

    Sweet ride.

  22. Comment by db | 09.23.2008 | 8:39 am

    +1 on the Green Valley loop. I remember that hill where you took photos of Kenny. Great ride. Enjoy the show.

  23. Comment by Daddystyle | 09.23.2008 | 9:02 am

    Interbike can be fun. makes you realize just how large the industry is.

    Embrace and enjoy

  24. Comment by KeepYerBag | 09.23.2008 | 9:16 am

    Why do I have a feeling this whole thing is going to culminate with a frantic quest for a box of grapefruit?

  25. Comment by UtRacerDad | 09.23.2008 | 9:56 am

    Green Valley is still one of my favorite rides in Utah, it is just a rolling blast. the other ride is Thunder Mountain near Bryce canyon, if you get a chance on the way back you should make the detour and take the ride.

  26. Comment by FliesOnly | 09.23.2008 | 1:44 pm

    FatCyclist t-shirts as a business card is an utterly brilliant idea. But then, I guess that’s why you’re the award winning blogger that gets invited to things like InterBike 2009 in Las Vegas, and I’m just a faithful reader stuck in Edmore Michigan.

  27. Comment by graisseux | 09.23.2008 | 4:25 pm

    Whatever happened to the BikeRadar column anyway?

  28. Comment by Rob L | 09.23.2008 | 8:44 pm

    I’ll send convention security a note to check your messanger bag on the way back out for any misplaced carbonfiber rigs.

    Great photo’s of that trail! I’ve heard good stuff about the green valley and zen trails before.

  29. Comment by Hart | 09.24.2008 | 6:03 am

    your buddies tights are tight.


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