Vote for Fatty…Or Vote for One of Fatty’s Friends

01.22.2010 | 10:00 am

The problem with being a beloved internet superstar celebrity such as myself — apart from the many other problems that typically plague the incredibly wealthy, handsome, and famous — is that I have gotten to know other beloved internet celebrities.

I know, that doesn’t sound like a problem. But let me explain. I’ll try to be brief, but you and I both know that I’ll fail.

I have ridden with Jill from Up in Alaska. I have sat in a bar in Brooklyn with Bike Snob NYC. And I have exchanged recipes with the Pioneer Woman.

And as we’ve gotten to know each other, all three of these bloggers have helped me raise huge amounts of money for LiveStrong in the fight against cancer. Jill raffled off a super-sweet camera. Bike Snob raffled off a trip to ride with him. And Pioneer Woman raffled off a whole truckload of photography equipment and software.

These people are my friends.

And now I’m pitted against each of them, trying to win 2010 Bloggies awards.

Here’s how:


As you probably know, I’m an attention whore I really like to win awards. And the “Best Sports” Bloggie is especially important to me, cuz if I win that this year, that makes three times, which would make me the first person to reach “hall of fame” status for that category.

But against friends? Well, the idea of that isn’t nearly as appealing, and for a while I considered just not even asking for your vote.

But then I considered: on a bike, do I race if a friend is in the race? Of course I do. And if I beat that friend, is our friendship damaged? Of course not, unless I really rub it in and blog about it and perhaps have a T-shirt made saying “I Kicked Dug’s Butt in Our 1:1 Challenge.”

Which I of course would never do. I think.

Similarly, if a friend beats me in a race, am I upset? Well of course I am, and you can bet that I’m going to cry as soon as I get to the privacy of my own bedroom. But at least publicly I’m going to punch him (or her) in the arm and say, in an affected British accent, “Good show old boy. Pip pip.”

My Instructions to You

So here’s what I would like you to do. Go to the Bloggies voting page, and vote. I’d really, really like to win the “Best Sports” category, so if you like my blog, vote for me there.

I’d also like to win the “Best Writing” and “Blog of the Year” categories, but against the heavy hitters there, don’t think that I realistically have a shot. But still, why not vote for the little (5′7″ and shrinking) guy?

Or, if you’re a big fan of one of my friends in any of those categories, please vote for them.

PS: For those of you who linked in here via the Bloggies page, here are a few posts from Susan’s and my battle with Cancer:

And here are links to a few of the “sports-y” posts that will give you a flavor of the site:

Thanks for checking my blog out.


  1. Comment by Big Rob in KC | 01.22.2010 | 10:18 am

    Done and done. Thanks for all the great posts, we love your writing and hope you win it all!

  2. Comment by Mindy | 01.22.2010 | 10:37 am

    You got my vote for best sports blog! Hope you win!

  3. Comment by Grayduncs | 01.22.2010 | 10:41 am

    Where do we vote for you in the best dancing (matching costumes) award?

  4. Comment by Clydesteve | 01.22.2010 | 10:46 am

    sure, I’ll vote for you, poppet.

  5. Comment by Dedicated Reader of FC | 01.22.2010 | 10:49 am

    Not only done, but was selected as a panelist and done, done, done there too.

    Go FC! Just convince The Runner to do a blog so we can vote for her too next year when you are not eligible for the Best Sports Blog:)

  6. Comment by Kathleen Lisson | 01.22.2010 | 10:57 am

    I voted for Fatty!
    Kathleen Lisson

  7. Comment by kingsbridgedr | 01.22.2010 | 11:20 am

    I voted for Fatty! Who couldn’t after his amazing RadioShack push earlier this year! Best blog by far! A video podcast of the dancing might be in order to win next year!

  8. Comment by Alyson | 01.22.2010 | 11:24 am

    Done & done. U rock Dude, and deserve all the good things that are coming your way!!

  9. Comment by T Foster | 01.22.2010 | 11:32 am

    No brainer.

  10. Comment by bikemike | 01.22.2010 | 11:40 am

    i would vote for dug but they don’t have a “Bathroom Rant” catagory…crap.

  11. Comment by Annie | 01.22.2010 | 12:10 pm

    Vote for Fatty!! Vote for Fatty!

    It is done. :)

  12. Comment by Susan | 01.22.2010 | 12:19 pm

    I cast my 3 votes…good luck!

  13. Comment by Guy Collier | 01.22.2010 | 12:30 pm

    Mr Fatty – just a quick note to say ta for answering the clothing question last week. Much appreciated from a rainy, dull England.

  14. Comment by Jenni Laurita | 01.22.2010 | 12:33 pm

    I’m gonna need a little more incentive.

    I’ll give you a template to fill in:

    If you vote for me and I win, I’ll _____________ you a______________.


  15. Comment by NYCCarlos | 01.22.2010 | 2:36 pm

    votes are in… I’m not telling you who I voted for :-P

    BTW: reposting all of those entries was great. Thanks for doing that. Even though I had read them before, I read thru them all again. I cried at work, and laughed out loud too… I’m pretty sure everyone here now thinks I’m absolutely crazy and mentally unstable. You’ve done a good thing dude. Thanks. Proud to (even if it is in the smallest possible way) be associated with you.

  16. Comment by Joel P. | 01.22.2010 | 3:07 pm

    Votes have been cast. Will wait for the results with much anticipation. Also, what NYCCarlos said about the reposted entries. I too cried then laughed all over again.
    Joel P.

  17. Comment by lbreyfog | 01.22.2010 | 4:03 pm

    Fatty- i feel responsible- i was one of the 200 random folk who were chosen to build the ballot- and it looks pretty familiar. you got my votes now, too.

    great call reposting, hopefully you’ve inspired more people via bloggies to kick the crap out of cancer.

  18. Comment by Kathleen@ForgingAhead | 01.22.2010 | 5:18 pm

    It’s all so very confusing. Thanks for clarifying. Vote for Fatty.

  19. Comment by Claire | 01.22.2010 | 6:53 pm

    I voted for you, I am fan of Ree over at Pioneer Woman too but she doesn’t make me cry or snort coffee through my nose at my keyboard as often as you do…so how could I not vote for you. :)

  20. Comment by Alex | 01.22.2010 | 9:46 pm

    Voted for ya, all three. Hope you win!

  21. Comment by Matthew | 01.23.2010 | 1:06 am

    I voted for ya, Fatty. You must win. You must win.

  22. Comment by MarylandYaYa | 01.23.2010 | 8:17 am

    You got my vote :)

  23. Comment by Bill | 01.23.2010 | 9:49 am

    Did the deal. Thought it was mildly ironic that my 2 words for confirmation that I am not a bot were “Mr usurping”…

  24. Comment by AngieG | 01.23.2010 | 3:14 pm


  25. Comment by Born 4 Lycra | 01.24.2010 | 2:51 am

    That’s 3 of us so far chosen at random for the panel.
    My votes are in and the winner is…………

    Who won the rasmoossen bottle?

  26. Comment by Mike Roadie | 01.24.2010 | 6:24 am


  27. Comment by Heidi Swift - Grit and Glimmer | 01.24.2010 | 8:56 pm

    Fatty for the win!
    You win this award or I die on my sword, I tell you.
    And Pioneer Woman! If she don’t win I reckon she should send the Marlboro Man and a gang of cattle-wrangling vigilantes out to bring justice to the free world.
    Cheesy Eggs and Cycling Legs,

  28. Comment by SH | 01.25.2010 | 11:22 am

    I’m lovingly throwing this out to The Runner:

    I truly hope you join us, Runner.

  29. Comment by Jenn | 01.25.2010 | 1:33 pm

    Done, done, and done. All three much-deserved. Good luck!

  30. Comment by Will Scott | 01.26.2010 | 10:18 am

    “I’m an attention whore”……..I truly laughed out loud….I also have the uneasy feeling that sometime, somewhere that thought will come to me on an uphill and I will kill it while laughing…….and since I can’t hardly breath when engaged in that activity…I’ll bend my bike….thanks again you are awesome….and I am just happy to be here….

  31. Pingback by Fatty or Snooty? The Hobson’s choice for Bloggies « Bike Intelligencer | 01.27.2010 | 1:06 pm

    [...] FatCyclist: “Vote for me because my third win means I won’t be eligible to harangue you next year!” [...]

  32. Comment by emily | 01.29.2010 | 5:10 am

    i dont even remember how i started reading your blog… 7 hours ago. i think it was a link that someone posted on facebook? maybe? anyway, now here it is, 5am, and i am still laughing out loud all alone in my room. i’m not going to like you tomorrow morning. but i voted for you, and best of luck.

  33. Comment by Surlyrider | 01.29.2010 | 8:23 am

    E. I stopped reading this as soon as I saw you talk about adjusting your bike because I was laughing so hard. When we were at Bike Line in Philly and they gave you your bike and you busted out the measuring tape, I almost peepeed in my pants. This tough urban shop that is used to food delivery folks, messengers, and one or two “serious” cyclists is not really the place that uses measuring tape for bikes. When you broke that out, the look on their faces was amazing and I was trying to keep it together, so I am impressed that you left the tape at home when you went to spin class.
    Some spin instructor tried to tell me how to adjust my spin bike. Their direction was TOTALLY wrong. I had to finally nicely tell them that I am a certified bike fitter. They did not even know what that was. It is horrifying that they give hundreds of people inproper fits every week!


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